I found that we actually rent the clubs for the meetings so therefore it is A.A.-not the club at that time. Therefore if the club knows anything about what happened at our meeting then our anonymity has been broken. Therefore the clubs cannot ban us from meetings.
I went to the buisness meeting and all of this and more came out. The chairperson who is the president said "If you rent a house and someone comes and makes trouble it is up to you to get rid of him right?" I said you just made my point. If we rent from them it is up to us to handle it.
__________________
False Events Appearing Real
Sometimes one must stand to do the "next right thing"
My sponsee was banned for bumming sigs. and I was banned because the person who cross talked me while I was asking how my sponsee could be banned when we don't ban anyone said "He's banned!" However, she was talking about my sponsee; but someone from the "club" was told that she banned me. So what happened at the meeting didn't stay there. And connfusion set in.
Why did A.A. finally drop all its membership regulations? Why did we leave it to each newcomer to decide himself whether he was an alcoholic and whether he should join us? Why did we dare say, contrary to the experience of society and government everywhere, that we would neither punish nor deprive any A.A. of membership, believe anything, or conform to anything? The answer, now seen in Tradition Three, was simplicity itself. At last experience taught us that to take away any alcoholic's full chance was sometimes to pronounce his death sentence, and often to condemn him to endless misery. Who dared to be judge, jury, and executioner of his own sick brother? As group after group saw these possibilities, they finally abandoned all membership regulations. One dramatic experience after another clinched this determination until it became our universal tradition.
Neither is General Service Conference, its Foundation Board,* nor the humblest group committeecan issue a single directive to an A.A. member and make it stick, let alone mete out any punishment....Trad. Nine.
We believe there isn't a fellowship on earth which lavishes more devoted care upon its individual members; surely there is none which more jealously guards the individual's right to think, talk, and act as he wishes. No A.A. can compel another to do anything; nobody can be punished or expelled. Our Twelve Steps to recovery are suggestions; the Twelve Traditions which guarantee A.A.'s unity contain not a single "Don't." They repeatedly say "We ought..." but never "You must!".....Trad. One.
Where does A.A. get its direction? Who runs it? This, too, is a puzzler for every friend and newcomer. When told that our Society has no president having authority to govern it, no treasurer who can compel the payment of any dues, no board of directors who can cast an erring member into outer darkness, when indeed no A.A. can give another a directive and enforce obedience, our friends gasp and exclaim, "This simply can't be. There must be an angle somewhere." These practical folk then read Tradition Two, and learn that the sole authority in A.A. is a lovingGod as He may express Himself in the group conscience.
I hope this helps. Thanks for being here for this A.A.
__________________
False Events Appearing Real
Sometimes one must stand to do the "next right thing"
I have to agree that there is something wrong with a group that would ban a person whos only infraction was asking others for cigarettes. As a moderator, the only reason I would ask someone to "move it outside" was when it was obvious they were being disruptive at the expense of others. If it appeared they were acting with disregard to others sobriety, especially newcomers who might be driven away by their behavior, I would first approach them privately. If they reacted aggressively, and it was obvious they did not care that their actions might be harmful to others, I would offer them time to think about it for a while before they came back(in harsher words -temporary ban). If they came back after that and immediately went back to behaving with disregard to the harm they caused to others sobriety, the ban would be reinstated (again, only long enough to give them a chance to think about the negative behavior), not because I wanted to "pronounce his death sentence", but because I wouldn't want him/her pronouncing it for someone else.
On the other hand, I agree with Doll, in that, if I found that a group I was in had that type of group mentality, I most certainly wouldn't want to be a part of it, and wouldn't be wasting my time or risking my sobriety to fight with them. I would just be thankful that I had discovered that they weren't right for me or my sponsee, and move on to another meeting.
From the Big Book chapter "How it works": "The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self-will can hardly be a success. On that basis we are almost alawys in collision with something or somebody, even though our motives are good."
The funny thing about AA literature is like my minister daddy taught me about the Bible. The more that is written about a topic, the more any of us can cite a scripture and verse that backs up our own personal convictions.
I believe in what great thinkers such as Confucius, LaoTzu, Buddah, and Jesus taught, which can be largely summed up in, "Wear your life like a loose garment." or "Live and let live."
"Let it be, let it be. Let it be, let it be. Speaking words of wisdom; let it be." -McCartney/Lenon
Groups have tried to expel members, but the banished have come back to sit in the meeting place, saying "This is life for us; you can't keep us out." Committees have instructed many an A.A. to stop working on a chronic backslider, only to be told: "How I do my Twelfth Step work is my business. Who are you to judge?"...Tradition is Tradition. My sponsee is homeless. And has the right to the same Great chace as us.
Tradition is to group survival what the steps are to the individual.
__________________
False Events Appearing Real
Sometimes one must stand to do the "next right thing"
