Hi I am new to this posting board. I am however, not new to AA. I almost have 18 months and this disease just makes me angry. My ABF just went out last Monday and he nearly killed himself by taking Adavan & drinking enough that the drink alone should have taken him out.
He is in rehab now and says this is the last time. Being an alcoholic myself, I know that is always possible that he will go out again. I am lost and I am looking for any advice. I just don't know when I am going to get sick and tired of being sick and tired. I am, thank God, still sober. I don't plan on changing that. But you take away alcohol and I still have "me". The static that goes on in my head.
Does anyone out there have any words of wisdom? Yes I am going to meetings. Even when I don't want to go. Which I've been wanting to just isolate. I hurt and I want to just sit here and have a pitty party. But I know I can't. Darn disease. I hate it.
Hi Serenity, im pretty new around (just over 10 months) so I dont really feel in a position to give any advice but what I can do is share my experience.
My 16 year old son has been drinking alcoholically for some years now, once I got sober, I knew that my sobriety came first and I would go to any lengths to protect that, even to the point of telling him that he would have to find somewhere else to live. He has gotten himself into some really dangerous situations including taking my car in a blackout and getting caught speeding in it. I just had to pray to my Higher Power and hand it over because worrying about him wasnt doing my sobriety any good. Also talking to my sponsor helped.
He has now joined the fellowship himself so we live quite a programmed life which is good but when he starts to miss his meetings etc and with him being so young there is a niggling feeling that hes going to go back out there and again I just pray and hand it over.
Please keep coming back and letting us know how you are doing.
Hi S Welcome to the board! Congrats on 18 months! Sorry to you you have to deal with all that is going on with your BF!! For me, when people go out, it reminds me of where I dont want to be! Dig deep into your program. Share with your sponsor where you are. Its great that you found this board and can reach out.
Im surprised your still so angry after a year and a half. Maybe switch things up or try something new with your sponsor. My little brother said to me once when I was pissed off at the disease:
"You know, Im glad Im an alcoholic because I would have never changed my life without the program!" Today he is happy in sobriety, and so am I. Nothing changes if nothing changes....
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
You stated you're going to meetings, so does this mean you're working / practicing the steps? and have a sponsor? If not, get busy, made all the difference in the world for me.
Sounds as if you qualify for AlAnon......... Glad you're here.
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
i would say your boyfriend is bothering you more than any thing else, you need to make up your mind on that part, and get serious about it, unless your married of coarse then u might be stuck.as doll said . 1 meetings. 2 find a sponsor. 3if you dont want to do that then stick around the older sober members. 4 read the books. you need to get your toolbox going as you dont have one, so your mind is snowing you under, by the way u can tell your head to shut up, but dont curse at the same time, just say SHUTUP it works when i do it, usually alone as others might not understand lol.
