im trying to not drink after yet another failed attempt of trying to be a normal drinking. everything has fallen apart. im like a prisoner in my mind to paranoid to go anywhere if im not drinking. i have that sick feeling in my stomach from guilt.
anything that you could say that may help right now would greatly be apprecieated
I feel your pain brother! Been there for sure. One thing is for sure....you can turn this around, but not alone. We need help to quit drinking and recover. All of us in here, in AA etc. have all gone thru this. Me personally, I had to go to a 5 day detox, then to a 28 day program. I found that very helpful (lifesaving in fact). It sounds like "normal" drinking may just not be possible for you. When I realized that I couldn't drink "safely", I did the only thing left for me to stay alive, threw myself into recovery. It may be hard to see that there is hope....but there is.....
scott
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Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. ~Buddha
Congratulations on your 1st day! You are in the right place - we have all been exactly where you are. I found when I first stopped drinking that I spent a lot of time going through this forum and reading other peoples' stories. It gave me the strength to get to my first meeting.
So I would have to say that is probably your next step. It comes with a lot of anxiety, but it is just fine - I promise. There is such support and understanding in those rooms! At some meetings they freely give you their number so you have someone to call when you want to drink THAT UNDERSTANDS. They have social functions - for those of us with "How do I have fun without alchohol?" (that would be me) - you get together with sober folks and have fun - and stay busy so drinking is not forefront in your mind.
I have a little over 30 days and there have been changes in my life. Just not drinking changed my life and I feel so much better. But to have the added support and friendship - I never thought I would be pulled out of the drinking and isolation - but here I am. I am slowly but surely going from being in an abusive relationship which required my isolation and really inspired my heavy drinking - to being sober and learning how to be free and trust again. It is incredible.
Imagine being able to say to someone "I am so glad I am not hungover today" and getting an emphatic nod of understanding back. Know anyone you can say that to today that completely understands and is there 100% to make sure you don't do it again?
Try a meeting. You will be surprised.
Please come back and share with us. We all care and wish you well.
tlc
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__________________ "By swallowing evil words unsaid, no one has ever harmed his stomach." ~Winston Churchill
Welcome Greg! Glad you found MIP! The only requirement is a desire to quit drinking! Once youve had enough, now is the time to get busy. Scott is right, we cannot do this alone. Look up some AA meetings and get to one fast. You will find you are not alone! There are thousands of people right where you are now.
When I first decided I had a problem, I went to meetings and just listened. Eventually it all sunk in. I had to play a game where I said, "today I will not drink, maybe tomorrow...." When tomorrow came, I did it again. I finally strung a few days together and started feeling so much better. Give AA a chance. Reach out for help! Its there, alls you have to do is want it!
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
Just take it one minute at a time. And seriously try to get to a face to face meeting today. It will REALLY help. I toughed it out for 3 weeks on my own before hitting my first meeting and now I wonder why I waited so long!
There is nothing wrong with reaching out for help, we have all done it. That's why we are here.
Take care.
In peace, Jules
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even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you --Psalm 139
Welcome to MIP. I know exactly what it is like to try to control my drinking and to fail yet again. I did it for years.
Eventually I decided to give AA a go and it was the very best thing that I could have done for myself. It has turned my life around.
I would suggest checking out AA meetings in your area. They are so important to me and it's great knowing that I am with other people who have exactly the same problem that I have and understand my fears and worries.
Congratulations on your first day of sobriety. Just hang in there and it really will start to get better for you.
Please keep posting and letting us know how things are going for you, won't you? You're not on your own.
Take care,
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
Let's see, normal drinker --- that's my sister, she can nurse one drink all night and leave half of it when see goes home. I hated her for that.
The paranoia will go away in time. Get to an AA meeting and you'll hear that it's not as uncommon as you may think it is.
And I am absolutely pleased to hear you have a sick feeling in your stomach from guilt. Wonderful news ... celebrate it!
A counsellor at the 28day program I went to walked into the class one day and said:
What's guilt?
He sat down and waited. Five minutes later and not a sound, people started fidgeting and looking at their hands, sitting on their hands, looking anywhere but at the counsellor. Finally he said:
Guilt is the feeling you get when you go against your own principles.
"What principles," I asked, "are you telling me that with all this guilt I have in me that I have principles! I don't think so!!"
"Sure you do, otherwise you would not feel guilty. Guilt tells you you are a principled person and that you have done something against those principles. And now that you know that, it's time to do something about it...."
Hey, talk about a rush ... realizing that took a good hunk of that guilt and destroyed it.
What a nice place to be; knowing that you have principles.
Have a great sober day, gregmc
Keep coming back
Bruce
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Until I know what I'm doing, I'll ask questions from someone who has what I want. If I don't like the answer, it's probably the one I need!
