On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.
In thinking about our day we may face indecision. We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don't struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while.
What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind. Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times. We might pay for this presumption in all sorts of absurd actions and ideas. Nevertheless, we find that our thinking will, as time passes, be more and more on the plane of inspiration. We come to rely upon it.
We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems. We ask especially for freedom from self-will, and are careful to make no request for ourselves only. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. We are careful never to pray for our own selfish ends. Many of us have wasted a lot of time doing that and it doesn't work. You can easily see why.
If circumstances warrant, we ask our wives or friends to join us in morning meditation. If we belong to a religious denomination which requires a definite morning devotion, we attend to that also. If not members of religious bodies, we sometimes select and memorize a few set prayers which emphasize the principles we have been discussing. There are many helpful books also. Suggestions about these may be obtained from one's priest, minister, or rabbi. Be quick to see where religious people are right. Make use of what they offer.
As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day "Thy will be done." We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves.
It works - it really does.
We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God discipline us in the simple way we have just outlined.
Pg 86-88 Chapter 6 ~ Into Action Taken from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous
(Let it be a God or Higher Power of your own understanding)
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Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
For the past 20 months or so, I have read these pages each morning along with my meditation books. This has been a tremendous help in getting my day started off right.
I know Ive read this also but didnt realize it was from the big book! Holds greater meaning for me today and thanks BGG for the tip on reading it each day as it is a great reading! Thanks for sharing it today Danielle!
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
I felt I would seeing as my new supplementary sponsor has instructed me to read it everyday. I'm a terribly undisciplined person. I'm scatty, disorganised, unable to prioritise & very easily distracted. I reached another point of dispair at my women's group on Tuesday & let go into tears as I couldn't see a way out of the mess of my very shaky program other than to turn away from it all, leave the rooms of AA & completely go my own way & risk everything that could involve.
I think I've been running on self will again with my defects in full flow. I haven't known the first place to start so luckily for me the right lady was in the right place at the right time after that meeting & gave me comfort & reassurance. I told her that the way I have been learning about the Steps & my Program has not been very methodical or in the way I have dealt with Sponsorship so far & that I needed more. That I was now ready to be told exactly what to do & would follow & be willing to the best of my ability.
To begin with she told me to read those pages everyday, which I am. I've also began to familiarise myself with the 7th Step prayer cuz all shocks of horrors, since I finished Steps 4&5 I hadn't been taught how to move onto 6&7. I've also not done any assets work at all. I'd been left hanging with all the awareness of these defects & in my defective thinking I haven't been working very hard to be willing to offer them up thoroughly to my HP. I will say this is my fault as I could have worked this out on my own but I didn't & I feel it was my Sponsor's role to specifically direct me how to do so. She is the type that Always expects me to call her & doesn't really share with me where she has been. Maybe distrust between us is two ways.
I'm sorry I can be such a baby but I really do need everything spelling out for me or I tend to just get very vague & forget tasks at hand. I've very little concentration & now having suffered as a result of all my shortcomings I've now asked this new lady to help me string together all of the work that I have done on my Steps so that I can tie it all together & have a program that functions in some manner of discipline. I told her I wanted to be obedient & to do as I was told. I've never been good at following instructions so this is new & positive changes for me I really need!
I think my previous sponsor has found it difficult to work with me at times as I've been full of pride, defenceful thinking & arrogance making it hard for me to get humbly honest with her. I've admired & looked up to her but I don't think I've entirely trusted her as she has seemed somewhat remote to me & I become reluctant to call & ask for her help. This has stood in my way & I've even found it difficult to admit to myself that this Sponsorship hasn't been working for me or rather I've not been working for it!
So this new lady has longer sobriety & is well experienced in travelling with women through the steps quick smart. Which is what I need. I need that discipline. I need someone with the confidence to tell it to me straight no matter what I say because this is what I said to her in the first place. 'Please frogmarch me through the Steps!' At least until I'm strong & practiced enough or made enough sense of them to do it by myself. I need someone else to direct my thinking because on my own I simply cannot do it. And that's from looking at the evidence of what I've been doing so far over the last 20mths. I have been working hard on my knowledge of the content of the Steps but not the structure. I've all the rudimentary ingredients for my Sobriety cake, at least upto 6&7 but not a solid sense of it. My HP's been in & out too.
I know it's not a race but I'd like to have some semblance of consistent peace & serenity by the time I reach 2yrs. I don't want to be tortured forever! I might be being mean with myself & forgetting how much of a mess I've really been in but the truth is that ever since I came into recovery & layers upon layers have lifted, all the while I have been learning.. 'Oh My Gosh, look at the state of Me!' I was a high bottom drunk so this deflation of ego has been extremely painful & no wonder I have fought it often kicking & screaming (silently, stubbornly, on the inside) My thoughts have been really complicated about the whole thing & I have missed having a Sponsor who I can confide & share all my innermost fears & reservations with.
I trust this new woman. She's in the field of work I want to train in too & maybe another good reason for my wanting what she has. I will do my best. And I will read these pages everyday until I have learned to pray consistently each morning. God please teach me how not to think I am in charge! Thanks for listening everyone here & good luck with yours, Daniella x
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Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
Wow Danielle, You took the words right out of my mouth! I am exacty in the same place as you and it can get very miserable! I tend to hide, isolate and pretend that all is well. I want to scream at times, "grab my hand and show me what to do!!!" Mostly, I need to pray for the Willingness to do the things Im told to do! So hang in, thanks for sharing and as always, You are not alone!!!! You put it in words sooo welll!!!!
Love ya Lani
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
