some of you might have suspected it since I keep coming to an AA message board and claiming that I'm never going to drink again but only last a week before going on another 6 month bender :)
Good to see you back. It took me a long time to really accept that I was an alcoholic. But, acceptance really was the key to me getting sober, and going to meetings and working the steps with a sponsor is what keeps me sober.
Just hang in there and it will get better. Honestly!
Please keep posting and letting us know how it is going, won't you?
Take care,
Carol
__________________
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
Hi Tipsy, I'm in the same position except ive got about 47 points on my driving licence now. Welcome back, I've not been here for a while either! Can't tell you what to do, don't even know my self, but the road I'm working on that fits for me (having no belief in a higher power) is to go and see professionals such as a community alcohol support team or in the case of desperation: Samaritans (in practice, not much use, but you can rant and lose anger). NHS direct can supply the answers to any medical alcohol related question you may have).
Don't ask me though! I'm not stable enough to advise other than to point you in the direction of people who know better!
Good luck.
(hi to everyone else here!)
Best wishes
Chris (cabbagehead)
__________________
"Computer games don't affect kids; I mean if Pac-Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music." -- Kristian Wilson, Nintendo, Inc, 1989"
hi, tipsy and chris. welcome back. well.. go to meetings.. and work those 12 Steps! That's what it's about,, there are all kinds of groups,,, but the special thing about AA is the Steps. And I couldn't do it without my Higher Power. It was only when I admitted defeat,, and decided to let God have a go,,, that my real recovery began.
love in recovery,
amanda
__________________
do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
Hi guys. :) Im thinking... where to start... hmmm. Id say if youve tried every thing else, why not give the program of AA a shot... Got nothin to loose. Hit up a meeting, and speak up. Ask about sponsorship, and step one. It will work if you want it to.... I promise.
__________________
My warranty on tomorrow has run out. My guarantee on the past is void. Nothing is going my way... and I like it like that.
McStagger, Welcome back among the ......LIVING. Yeap, your among those who are LIVING the beautiful life of sobriety and all that comes with it. Looking for the "easier softer" well better go on. There ain't a one of us here who have found it easy to overcome our imperfections. It takes work......and either you're willin to do it or you aren't. We have all come through it ....... a day at a time. We are all here to give whatever support you need. However, it is a choice, one that ONLY you can make. None of us can force you to take that first step towards recovery. We will help you anyway we can. Suggest you take that first step, as we all have. Then another and another. Before you know you will be walking on a path like no other that will afford you rewards as never before. Pick up that phone, make that call, go to a meeting (or meetings) and put a little "elbow grease" into the 12 steps. Let's us know how things are going ...... You can do it!!!!! Best of Luck, Wanda
Hi Chris, It's been quite awhile, huh? Glad your back. Missed your humor!!
You have no idea how nice it is to see that you people are still here.
Maybe there's still hope for this little drunkenstumblbumpisspot in the world of the living, sober, happy people.
The funny thing is that whenever I encounter people who are considering AA I always do my best to convince them to go and try it and be open minded. I often find myself getting into debates about AA myths and falsehoods...why I haven't taken my own advice is a mystery. I guess I'm a slow learner.
Hey McStagger, First of all there is a reason I chose the name "Learning". It is what we ALL do!!!! Secondly, YOU ARE NOT A DRUNKENSTLULBUMPISSPOT! (God only knows I am glad this is the only time I will have to spell that one. LOL) You are human. And as humans, we tend to make mistakes. Some big some small. It is what we do with those errors. How we cope with them....correct them......or continue the same. Did you hear anyone here call you names? So dont be so hard on yourself. Thirdly, you HAVE taken a step......admitting you have a problem. One that you can't handle on your own. That my friend has taken courage to do. Fourth, you are not alone in this. Look at the number of replies. You have all kinds of support here. Heed what is offered you.......believe in it........forgive yourself......and it is promised you will begin to reap the benefits.
Hi Tipsy... Hi Chris... I am happy you are here! Chris your hair is great haha... I think you have gotten some great advice.. and I think I should take it also... I don't work the program like I should AT ALL either. I have gone to a few meeting and thats about it! Keep us posted as to how you are both doing... great to meet u both :)
__________________
"Advice is what you ask for when you already know the answer but wish you didn't"
Hey Tipster, good to see you back. Gosh, you've gone around with this, I'm so glad to have seen your post. You keep posting and keeping us informed, k? big hug, Wren
(hey, Chris!!!!!! You're hair looks greener. How cool to also see your sweet face back!)
__________________
"Never argue with an idiot... They'll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience..."
For all its worth here is my understanding of the program peppered with my experience and doubtless laced with my opinion.
My experience is yes I used because I loved it I loved to be stoned the problem was when it wore off I began my using like all of my peers, I wasn't aware of trying to escape anything or a twos up to the world in general. I was from a fairly privelaged background and had no worries other than wheres the party. I drank and used because of the ease and comfort it brought, I was more confident could party longer and always be in the mood. Same as all my friends, only I always pushed it and even after cringing and saying never again I did again and again and again as I did this that cringe ( shame and remorse) became a compounding reason for doing it again and again. Until these feelings were so huge I could not bear them and made the choice not to feel at all close down to myself. I put down the substance the feelings overwhelmed me I did not know where to begin so I used and used and used. To me this is the cycle of addiction which I believe to be seperate form my defects and shortcomings which I believe are the human condition this is where I need the spiritual solution the steps and the application of a program so I do not use on my feelings. I maintain my abstinence to safeguard me from falling into this 'habitual' cycle I TRY to maintain a program to be spiritually well.
Whilst I do not believe I have a disease, I do believe I cannot use in any way shape or form because of perhaps just the fear that this will trigger all over again.
More recently I have been struggling with my spiritual wellness probably as a result of half measures not finishing the steps not having a sponsor and not attending meetings However i believe that the solution lies in the steps and the maintenece of a program.
My first sponsor once said to me 'this is a twelve step program, we do 1-12 in the order intendend, now i can show it to you but you must find it for yourself' I know what that means now
Good luck to you and best wishes for your journey of recovery ( it gets better)
DISCLAIMER: The above is MY opinion not the opinion of Alcoholics Anonymous
Nice to meet you Tipsy you've really given me a good laugh. Thanks for coming back & enjoying the old faces. What do you think of the new ones? ;) I'm 7months sober today & it's been a trip! So glad to know that there's others still struggling but willing to have a go. I really hope you find something more this time around too. We do have to give up the fight & let go. It's much easier when we admit we're licked & try this easier, softer way. There is no other & I do believe that. It's my choice to believe that because it helps me to stop fighting. I don't have to fight anymore cuz I decided I didn't want that mess anymore. You don't still want it do you? Does it have to get any worse? Bad enough hey! The only way is up. Let go & see what catches you. We're here & you'll find us at meetings too. Lots of us at lots of meetings. The fellowship offers the same program everywhere so hook yourself, lay back & let go. We'll see what you can learn. Keep us posted & letting us know how you are. We can give you some tough love too if you'd like :) Take good care Tipsy. How about a more past tense name~sake like 'Was McStaggered!' Over & peace out Danielle x
__________________
Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
I'm sort of looking for that "easier softer" I remember hearing about...
seriously though, I'm thinking the 15th time is the charm.
Thats brazilliant. Well, so far, its not working for me...
I'm scared. SCARED.
Scared I will never be willing, even though I prayed for the willingness to be willing, scared I'll never turn my ass around, or crawl out of this frighteningly intense shelter I've built for myself. What happens when your walls are so high and thick you can't get out yourself?
Should I tell another lie, and pray the miracle happens this time?
Go through withdrawel (again), and hope that this time, this time, I can put the 11th step prayer into practice?
Anyhow I am rambling, and I buried this one pretty deep so...
-- Edited by StPeteDean on Tuesday 14th of April 2009 06:03:00 AM
I spotted your recent post to TMc! Luke, go to meetings, get a sponsor, read the literature, work the steps. You will have a spiritual awakening & need not take a drink again 1Day@aTime. The whole point of the steps is to gain this psychic change & I believe that change is especially in the art of surrender. It is my experience that in learning this crucial skill we achieve emotional stability, serenity & recover from all the reasons why we drank in the first place. Keep up your hope. Do as suggested & you will get it. Danielle x
__________________
Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
I began my using like all of my peers, I wasn't aware of trying to escape anything or a twos up to the world in general. I was from a fairly privelaged background and had no worries other than wheres the party. I drank and used because of the ease and comfort it brought, I was more confident could party longer and always be in the mood. Same as all my friends, only I always pushed it and even after cringing and saying never again I did again and again and again as I did this that cringe ( shame and remorse) became a compounding reason for doing it again and again. Until these feelings were so huge I could not bear them and made the choice not to feel at all close down to myself. I put down the substance the feelings overwhelmed me I did not know where to begin so I used and used and used. To me this is the cycle of addiction which I believe to be seperate form my defects and shortcomings which I believe are the human condition this is where I need the spiritual solution the steps and the application of a program so I do not use on my feelings. I maintain my abstinence to safeguard me from falling into this 'habitual' cycle I TRY to maintain a program to be spiritually well. 
However i believe that the solution lies in the steps and the maintenece of a program.
I know what that means now