Somebody has just emailed this to me and I wanted to share it. I guess that it is something that we all need to think about, but it may be especially helpful to anybody just starting out with AA. I know that it is advice that I certainly need.
Have a great day,
Carol
Every slip has a beginning. Know your danger signals.
1. Start missing Meetings for any reason, real or imaginary.
2. Become critical of the methods used by other members, who may not agree with you in everything.
3. Nurse the idea that someday, somehow, you can drink again and be a controlled drinker.
4. Let the other fellow do the 12th Step work in your group. You are too busy.
5. Become conscious of your A.A. seniority and view every new member with a sceptical and jaundiced eye.
6. Become so pleased with your own views of the programme that you consider yourself an 'elder statesman'.
7. Start a small clique within your own group, composed of only a few members who see eye-to-eye with you.
8. Tell the new member, in confidence, that you yourself do not take certain of the Twelve Steps seriously.
9. Let your mind dwell more and more on how much you are helping others, rather than on how much the A.A. programme is helping you.
10. If an unfortunate member has a slip, you drop him at once.
11. Cultivate the habit of borrowing money from other members, then stay away from Meetings to avoid embarrassment.
12. Look upon the 24-hour plan as a vital thing for new members, but not for yourself. You have outgrown the need of that long ago.
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
"The drink is the very last part of the Slip" is one of my favorites to remember.
And this is a little Roadmap on how these simple errors that can be made by ALL of us. When I read the list, scary, but I have to admit, said yep, in an area, I don't want to really ackowledge, denial, is not a good thing.
Really scary, and for me, somehow I do need to get SCARED into right action.
I have come to the conclusion lately that having time in this Program, can easily work against this Alcoholic, and having been seaching for some clear directions in this new Fear.
Thank you So very much for this list. it is going on the center of my Frig. "The capacity to be honest" starts here for this alke.
3. Nurse the idea that someday, somehow, you can drink again and be a controlled drinker!! it says in the big book this idea must be smashed. hard one here for me, cunning baffling and powerful, take care, thanks for the post! wagon
As soon as I saw the list I scanned through it and instantly had to say 'guilty' to one or two of them. I'm now going to make it part of my AA day and reading to make sure that I don't slip. Fear of slipping is total for me. I truly don't ever want to go back there.
One guy, with almost twenty years of sobriety, often says 'if you don't want to slip, don't go where it is slippery.' I really like that one and it helps me enormously.
When I first started with AA I would listen to everything that was said, but I have since learned that I wasn't really listening. Now, I listen to everything and anything and carry it with me.
Have a great Sunday.
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
From the very first day with AA I had to get rid of any feelings that I would ever be able to drink 'normally' again. Every now and then, my alcoholic brain tries to tell me that I am not alcoholic. Thankfully, I finally know better and try to pay no attention to it. I cannot say that I am glad to be an alcoholic, but I'm very glad that I know I am. Now, I can do something about it.
Take care,
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
It was a few weeks ago, that someone Posted about how to remain "safe" in this Program, if that is even really possible, but I did like what he wrote.
If I can recall correctly it was, going to a Meeting, focus on the new people in the Rooms, remember first thing in the morning to be Grateful and Humble for our Sobriety, put much effort into staying in the Center of this Program, not on the outskirts.
He wrote it in a much simplier version, I think he said, "A truly Grateful Alcoholic, has a good chance of getting through this next 24 hours".
Many years ago, when my "Gorilla" (Alcoholism) was going down for a long sleep, I Pray to God, he remains asleep, but I did keep wondering, never, ever, ever drink again??? Finally, listening to this subconsious nagging, I addressed it consiously, with "o.k., if the day ever comes, where I am in Communist Red China and am looking at a prison sentence, for life, because I am an American, Then, and only then, will I agree to have a drink. Maybe it sounds silly, but it stopped the subconsious nagging of never, ever, ever. With my history, and how I crawled into this Program, from a very ugly gutter, one of my true life's ambitions is to die, Sober.
I used to think that my 10 year Relapse freaky years, were going to be my Rock, in Recovery, my insurance, but I have discovered that there is no real insurance. But I do believe with all my heart, that I do not have another Recovery in me, so need to do what ever needs to be done, in this 24 hour daily Reprieve Program.
We only know on the inside how dilligent we are being, am I being Proactive, or am I giving "lip service" to being Proactive.
Lots of good, thought provoking items are on that list, so thank you again, for the list, the one that baffled me, was, are you spending so much time doing 12th Step work, you are overlooking your own Program. Yicks!
"Go directly to Jail, Do Not Pass Go" hahahahahaha Funny, but not funny because this Program, is anything but a game.
It is similar to me as walking a tightrope, balance, balance, balance.
For me, if I ever felt 'safe' in this program, then I would know that I was doing something badly wrong. Early in my recovery, I was told to 'stay in the middle of the AA life-raft'. That's what I am working at on a daily basis.
I go to three meetings every week. Yesterday, I went to my lovely Saturday morning meeting and I was asked if I would do the main share as the speaker hadn't turned up. I took it as an enormous compliment and opened my heart without any problem. I knew that I was with good people; with my friends. In July, I am chairing four meetings and I have the four speakers that I wanted to share their experience, strength and hope. I am in charge of the birthday book for my home group.
In March 2004, I joined AA for the first time. I knew that I was an alcoholic and that I simply couldn't fight this illness on my own. I had eight blissful weeks of re-discovering the sheer joy of waking sober every morning. Then, I went back 'out there' and spent the worst eighteen months of my life.
I lost my long term boyfriend and I almost lost my home. I lost the final shreds of any respect and pride that I had for myself. Blackouts were normal for me. I was constantly covered in cuts and bruises were I had fallen, but I had no recollection of the fall. I never woke up, I always 'came to'. I had done damage to my liver. I had done damage to relationships with my family and neighbours. I didn't want to live any more. I couldn't face my life with alcohol and I couldn't face it without.
I hit my rock bottom with one hard, resounding smack.
When I started back with AA in November 2005 I went with my head hung in shame. I dreaded meeting people that I had known only eighteen months before. How wrong could I have been? Folk who I had known welcomed me back with open arms, literally. Several people cried with joy to see me back. I wept with a wonderful feeling of having 'gone back home'.
I promised myself that I would devote every spare minute that I had to my recovery and to giving back to this wonderful Fellowship in any way that I could. I am fortunate for a week or two in that I have more spare time than I usually have. So, I am fulfilling the promise that I made to myself.
Have no fears, I have been working on my Step 4 this weekend and, although at times it is so very hard and painful, I am feeling better and stronger every minute. My sobriety is the most important thing in my life. Without it, I wouldn't have anything left.
Life feels great and this grateful alcoholic is grabbing this opportunity with both hands - and I ain't letting it go this time!
I'd like to thank the wonderful people who make this message board possible. How wonderful to know that there are some truly wonderful people in this world.
Take care and enjoy the rest of your Sunday.
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
I had to say guilty to more than just a couple of 'em. I guess my previous relapses would explain that! I have to keep asking myself "what's different this time?" Life is still tough but it's a million times better than where I was before. Have to remember that. Take it easy everyone. Another day sober is a victory!
I was thrilled when the Danger Signals were emailed to me. That's just what I needed. I have saved it and have it backed up twice! I'm not going to loose it.
Take care and have a super day everyone.
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
I collect akronyms, and that one is a doozy... 