I'm not even sure if this is the proper forum for me but here I go. I am the very definition of a functioning alcoholic and for the last several months I've been wanted to stop drinking altogether. I purchased the AA The Big Book and Daily Reflections... I've been reading the book and even cut down some for a week or so.. but now I'm back to where I have always been. My question/request for advice is how is the best way to focus on a date and just go for it... I quit smoking 6 months ago and so glad I did. Oh and I drink one big bottle of white wine every day. I know what the answer is for me just looking for another perspective.
Not an Actual face to face meeting, just this forum. I'm not even sure I want to do that, it was hard just writing the post. I'll continue to read with the hopes that soon I will say.. this is it - no more.
Well, good luck with the "focus on a date" approach.
The only advice I can think of is: stick to the date. If you can stick to it, then great. If you cannot stick to it, you should be aware of what it means to your health.
Congrats on your smoking quit. That's a tough one. Keep up the good work.
If you are lucky, being an alcoholic will beat you into submission making you open enough to recieve the gift of desperation.
If you are not lucky, you can secretly hate what you see in the mirror causing you to keep up the facade that drinking brings on and continue battling with being an egomaniac with an inferiority complex that doesn't have the goddamn guts to jump off that bridge and face the truth that you killed the party in drinking long ago so the only reason you continue to do so is because you have failed to find a mature coping mechanism to deal with life. Back on your heels, always.
wow, Thank you for those words, all true. I tried stick to the date and it worked for a while.. and before the date I really drank. But, last night, on the way home from work I did not get me a bottle of wine. Did not drink last night, does that make it my first day! Last night I also read a few chapters of the big book . Some of the stories hit home other not so much but I'm enjoying the book. I don't want to drink tonight. Tonight I'll practice the piano some more, been trying to self-teach myself, it's a slow process but I like it. Have a good day everyone
I did the same. Had a Big Book and a Bible, read them both, but they were nothing but black letters on white pages. Make note that in the Doctor's Opinion chapter is clearly states that unless a man undergoes an entire psychic change there is little hope of his recovery. The following paragraph states that once a man has changed he finds himself easily able to control his desire for alcohol.
This is true. My own experience bears it out. Look at the title page. The Big Book is the story of how many men and women have recovered. The chapter There is a Solution starts off by saying that nearly all have recovered, the problem has been solved. The promises that appear after the tenth step make it clear that once we have embraced the principles of the steps and made them a part of our daily lives that the problem has been removed. It no longer exists. This use of the past tense has been my barometer. If I don't have that, I have work to do. I am missing something.
In the chapter More About Alcoholism it tells us that if we still have an alcoholic mind we will drink again. This is why the Doctor says we must undergo an entire psychic change. We must become new people. The old us was insufficient. If I still want to drink, I haven't changed. It used to be said that when you take the bottle away from the horse thief, you're still stuck with a horse thief.
The only suggestion I can make is to learn the principles of the steps, preferably with a strong sponsor since, left to your own devices, you are still stuck. Remember that the steps are not black letters on white pages that form a checklist that we put on the refrigerator to look at when we are done. The steps are a pattern for changing lives through the grace of God, and for living that changed life. Make an honest start, be willing to grow, and, if putting your old life behind you sounds good, join us on the road to happy destiny.
Thank you for taking the time to comment. So, my work day is over.... a little edgy - I'm avoiding the food store. If I go there, I'll get what we need and some wine, I just know it. Nevertheless, no Wine in the house so if I don't drink tonight, it will be Day Two Tomorrow.
-- Edited by Francisco on Tuesday 19th of March 2019 02:58:55 PM
Tanin, I do appreciate the words of encouragement. Last night I did it again, did not get me my dear old friend, that large bottle of wine. today is Day 6. woohoo -
I suggest you stay in contact with others like you. With us here on this forum...with others in online meetings....with others in face to face meetings....your choice
Don't drift away from the path of recovery. You cannot do it by yourself.
I drank everyday and night I quit 100 tomes I had to believe Something greater, Guitar for me Music at first then Came to Believe something in the Rooms of AA
Hope you're still around Francisco, ... next to smoking, alcohol has been the biggest battle in my life ... and with this program, I've not found it necessary to have a drink for 11 years ...
Good Luck and God Bless, Pappy
__________________
'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Another alcoholic in Hawaii caring about your and your wife's journey. How your doing Francisco? Having a Convention this weekend in Kona and planning on heading that way to join the rest of our world wide family. Keep on keeping on and make sure you have a Higher Power sticking by your side.
It's my sincere belief that if you can quit smoking you have it in you to quit anything. I know because I struggled with that damn monkey for decades! I've been nicotine free for over two years now.
Whenever I get discouraged about my failure with giving up alcohol, I remind myself how many kicks at the can it took for me to quit cigarettes until it stuck. It inspires me to keep fighting.
