I'm so afraid of failing yet again. It hurts my daughter that I've tried and failed. She takes it personally. I don't want to fail, I don't want to let anybody down. I want to stop feeling ashamed.
This is a program of action. If you want to see real results and to not feel those bad feelings anymore, you have to put your guard down and make yourself vulnerable to the program. This means going to face to face meetings, talking directly to someone that has walked this walk and get involved with the step work.
There are great people on this board but at best we can point you in the right direction. You have to get yourself out there and do the squirmy parts on your own. Wish you the best.
Phoenixjen Ours is a lifetime program...the disease doesn't and will not stop trying to take you and every other person, place and thing around you down. If and when you don't drink and/or use and attend to recovery as the old timers and sponsors direct you to recovery will come more easily though never perfect. Ours is a "do" program and if you don't it will not work.
Check your area for Alateen meetings and if they are available and she is by age qualified direct her to it and then let your HP have her and her process.
My grand-daughter recently attempted suicide and said before she made the attempt the visions of her father's drinking, using and immoral behavior played in her mind and she felt guilty and shameful. Isn't that amazing? Others take responsibility for our disease also.
Keep coming back here often and don't ever give up asking for help. ((((hugs))))
it is rare for any of us to stay sober at first ... I've been to 4 rehabs early on ... hiding my drinks, the shame I felt afterwards, the weakness I felt was overwhelming ... Only when I was desperate enough, did I start to follow the direction and the advice of those who were successful in staying sober ...
Being afraid? .. normal ... we learn to live with the fear until we see what our predecessors did to be successful ... and then the 'promises' in the AA book came true for us and the fear disappeared ... What I feared most was 'change' ... the unknown ... I'd be dead now had I given up and not worked the program of AA ... THAT is the honest truth ... (sober 10+ years now) ...
Good Luck and God Bless, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Jen...how are you doing today? Have you practiced again what kept you sober yesterday? If you have you might have less fear of continuing to be sober and less fear of trusting those who came before you and a Higher Power. Today is another 2/8 (February 8th) anniversary for me who stayed around and learned even while I didn't like being here from the start and stayed anyway. I will ask my Higher Power to stand with you and your daughter thru sobriety like HP did it for me. Keep coming back. ((((hugs))))
Mahalo Tanin the morning meeting here was such as those that have kept me coming back ever since I felt the love and empathy of AA and decided to stay and follow in the footsteps of those who came before me. I got asked to journey with a relative newcomer and will offer him the ESH tool box I have including MIP without breaking our anonymity. What say the board about referring others like us to participate?
