Today's Gift - Aug

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Today's Gift - Aug

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

We need the courage to start and continue what we should do, and courage to stop what we shouldn't do.
--Richard L. Evans

What is courage? Many of us think it involves surviving against all odds. Some of us believe courage is personified by an individual like Helen Keller, who coped with many physical defects to vastly change her life and the lives of those around her. Others of us believe courage is personified by people like astronaut John Glenn, who took risks trying something new knowing he could fail.

Are we courageous? Compared to those people we would probably say no. Yet we are because we have taken risks to change our lives. Being willing to change is an act of courage. Believing in change and forging ahead on the new, uncharted path is an act of courage.

We are the only ones who can change ourselves. Just as Helen Keller and John Glenn made decisions to alter their lives, so do we make decisions to risk changes. Whether we started on our new way of life years ago, days ago, or even hours ago, we are filled with courage because of the decisions we made.

I can say the Serenity Prayer and remember my courage.

You are reading from the book:

Night Light by Amy E. Dean

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

No tap dancing around problems

Our program calls for a "searching and fearless" moral inventory, not only in the beginning, but as we continue to follow our new way of life.

What this means is complete honesty about who and what we really are. We should not tap dance around our problems in order to evade responsibility. This will not bring the cleansing we need for real sober living. We need deep changes, not mere surface ones.

Difficult as it is to be fully honest, it's made easier when we remind ourselves that it's all for our own recovery. We benefit in proportion to the amount of honesty we bring to our inventory. If it's searching and fearless, the results will be far-reaching and substantial.

I will not shirk from facing the truth about myself as I go through the day. What I need for self-improvement will be revealed to me.

You are reading from the book:

Walk in Dry Places by Mel B.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Reflection for the Day

The slogan "Live and Let Live" can be extremely helpful when we are having trouble tolerating other people's behavior. We know for certain that nobody's behavior - no matter how offensive, distasteful or vicious - is worth the price of a relapse. Our own recovery is primary, and while we must be unafraid of walking away from people or situations that cause us discomfort, we must also make a special effort to try to understand other people - especially those who rub us the wrong way. Can I accept the fact, in my recovery, that it is more important to understand than to be understood?

Today I Pray

When I run headlong into someone's unpleasant behavior, may I first try my best to understand. Then, if my own sobriety seems threatened, may I have the courage to remove myself from the situation.

Today I Will Remember

Live and let live.

You are reading from the book:

A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Other people's actions need not affect us.

Our program friends are showing us how to detach from other people and their problems. We have learned we aren't the cause of a family member's alcoholism or the never-ending trauma in a friend's life, though our family and friends may try to blame us for their difficulties. The program teaches us that we don't have the power to make others go against their will. But when others cast blame our way, it's been our nature to absorb it. Now we are learning how to refuse the blame.

Part of the problem is our desire to be liked. The anger or criticism that's directed at us hurts. Few people are wholly immune to barbs from others. Even strangers can trigger reactions in us. But we can change - we can learn detachment. Our program friends are good role models. Daily we can work at letting whatever someone else says or does roll off us. In time, detachment will become our nature.

I will ask my sponsor for help if I let someone get to me today.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is the lightning that does the work.
--Mark Twain

Thunder demands our attention. From the ear-splitting boom overhead to the faint rumble in the distance, it is an impressive part of nature. Yet, it is the lightning that discharges electricity from one cloud to another, or to the earth.

We are sometimes like thunder. We may shout our intentions to family members, or quietly tell our dreams to friends. No matter how we say it, it is the ability to follow through that is most important. When we've completed what we've set out to do, we will feel a sense of satisfaction and energy. With this energy, and the knowledge we can finish what we set out to do, we will make our dreams come true.

What is left incomplete that I can finish today?

You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Loving others begins with respect.

So many books have been written on how to love that many of us assume we don't know how and maybe will never learn. We can simplify the process, however, by focusing on the Golden Rule. For starters, we can treat others as respectfully as we'd like to be treated. People respond well to respect, and they often pay us respect in return.

Next, let's put the needs of at least one other person ahead of our own today. It's imperative that we do it willingly, not resentfully. We can ask God to help us. We'll discover an unexpected benefit; not being self-absorbed, for a change, is really quite refreshing.

Finally, we can ask God for freedom from the thinking that keeps us from loving others. Each person who enters our circle of experience today can be loved by us if we are willing to turn to God for help.

Loving others is easier if we keep it simple.

I will focus on courtesy today.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Changing

The old saying is true: You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink. It's the same with addiction and recovery. People can take away our drugs and put us in treatment, but no one can make us clean and sober.

When it hurts enough, when we're scared enough, when we're sick and tired enough, when we've lost enough, then we'll begin to change. But we have to want to change. It's the key.

What am I willing to do to recover?

Higher Power, help me to want what I need; to want what is best for me.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

We honor the spirit in other people when we listen to them.

God's messages surround us. The 24 hours before us are special, never to be repeated. The people we share the day with carry our lessons within their words and actions. Let's be vigilant in our attempts to listen.

We have so much to learn, and that's why we're here. Our lives have purpose, even though we might fail to grasp it. Remembering that God is trying to reach us in even the most mundane of circumstances keeps us attentive to everyone in our lives. Our attention to others triggers their lessons too.

The cycle is never-ending. We are not here by accident - we are here by design. The role addiction plays in our lives is part of the design. We can learn our lessons and fulfill our purpose only by acknowledging the spirit, the presence of God, within each person God has ushered to us.

I will pay special attention to the people in my life today. It's a wonderful feeling knowing they are part of God's plan for me.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

I thank God for my handicaps for, through them, I have found myself, my work, and my God.
--Helen Keller

All of us have unique talents and gifts. No obstacle, be it physical, mental, or emotional, has the power to destroy our innate creative energies.

In order to tap our inner resources, we must first be willing to explore our interests and abilities. Then we need to make persistent efforts to acquire the necessary skills and knowledge which will help us achieve our highest potentials.

Helen Keller's life story is an excellent example of this kind of courage and persistence. With the help of her teacher, Anne Sullivan, Helen learned to speak and read. Because Helen did not allow her blindness and deafness to destroy her innate gifts, she inspired millions to challenge their own physical, mental, and emotional handicaps and limitations.

Today I will not allow my limitations to overwhelm me. I will see them as challenges that I and others can benefit from. I will acquire any new skills or information I need to make my limitations work for me, not against me.

You are reading from the book:

The Reflecting Pond by Liane Cordes

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

If you don't have any loyalty to what you are doing, you ought not be doing it.
-- Tom Harding

We understand loyalty to friends and family members, but does loyalty to an activity imply the same thing? To be loyal to an activity means to stick with it even when we hit the inherent snags. Let's consider a hobby for instance. Are we so frustrated when we can't track down a particular stamp or seem unable to complete the 5000 piece puzzle that we consider quitting the activity in disgust? If so, we probably lack the loyalty that Tom alludes to.

Each of us has to consider for ourselves whether or not we value this kind of loyalty when it comes to the "extracurriculars" in our lives. We're not failures if we decide to drop some hobby for another one. Sometimes we can't see that some interest doesn't fit us all that well until we get deep into it. What's more important is that we remain loyal to our values, whatever they are. When some activity loses its appeal, for any reason, and we continue to stay with it out of shame or embarrassment, we're not being loyal to that which is most important - ourselves.

Today, I'll ask myself if my hobbies suit my true interests.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

A.A. Thought for the Day

Our faith is apt to be weak, and so we have to strengthen and build up this faith. We do this by going to meetings and listening to others tell how they have found all the strength they need to overcome drinking. Is my faith being strengthened by this personal witness of other alcoholics?

Meditation for the Day

It is the quality of my life that determines its value. The most valuable life is one of honesty, purity, unselfishness, and love.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be honest, pure, unselfish, and loving.

You are reading from the book:

Twenty-four Hours a Day for Teens by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - and stay there, lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove lid again... but also, she will never sit down on a cold one any more.
--Mark Twain

"Last night I asked for help, but the person couldn't give it to me. Tonight I'm not going to ask because I'll be refused." Poor us! One person has rejected us, so now we've got the whole world rejecting us. We believe if one person lets us down, everyone else will too.

Such thinking, as negative as it is, can provide safety. If we believe we can't trust anymore, then we won't. But there won't be any growth in this kind of safety. By condemning everyone, we won't see those who want to help.

To find help we may have to ask several people. If a few people turn us away, we shouldn't give up hope. There are many flowers in the field of life, but to pick the best, we need to look at them all.

If I get rejected it doesn't mean I'm a bad person or no one can be trusted. It means I need to take another risk or maybe two.

You are reading from the book:

Night Light by Amy E. Dean

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Differences
. . . with no hidden cutting edge.

The respect and dignity a couple shows each other set the table from which they are nourished for all other activities in their lives. Any feeling can be expressed in respectful or disrespectful ways. Anger is one of the most difficult to express respectfully. Everyone feels frustrated and angry at times. The crucial thing to learn is how to be angry and still be respectful how to deal with our impatience without blame or put-downs. Many of us have to learn how to love without being possessive, how to be playful in a lighthearted way with no hidden cutting edge. When we treat our partner with disrespect, we pour poison into our own well. It may feel satisfying at first, but the long-term consequences are not good to live with.

When we are committed to respect in our relationship, we continue to learn at even deeper levels what respect truly means. We find that simply listening to each other and letting in our differences is a form of respect that nourishes us.

Name a difference between you and your mate that you respect.

You are reading from the book:

The More We Find In Each Other by Merle Fossum and Mavis Fossum

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Forming new habits

We form habits and then these habits begin to form us. For so long we had such self-destructive ways of being: We were self-centered, angry, and critical people, and so we behaved selfishly, angrily, and judgmentally in the world.

To stay clean and sober we must develop new habits, new patterns of living. We must give up old hangouts, old friends, old attitudes, and ideas. It seems this is the only way to form new habits - for example, kindness, love, and honesty - on which our program is based.

What habits do I want to develop?

Higher Power, Help me to form new habits to replace the old ones that nearly destroyed my life.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Reflection for the Day

Looking back, I realize just how much of my life has been spent in dwelling upon the faults of others. It provided much self-satisfaction, to be sure, but I see now just how subtle and actually perverse the process became. After all was said and done, the net effect of dwelling on the so-called faults of others was self-granted permission to remain comfortably unaware of my own defects. Do I still point my finger at others and thus self-deceptively overlook my own shortcomings?

Today I Pray

May I see that my preoccupation with the faults of others is really a smokescreen to keep me from taking a hard look at my own, as well as a way to bolster my own failing ego. May I check out the "why's" of my blaming.

Today I Will Remember

Blame-saying is game-playing.

You are reading from the book:

A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

No person could save another.
--Joyce Carol Oates

We encounter the experiences we need in our lives. It's sometimes hard to believe that when we're grappling with disappointment, anger, or loss. Yet everything that comes our way is material for our growth.

Many of us entertain a fantasy that some person can complete us. We don't believe that we're complete in ourselves. Only when we do will we become able to share in a life-enhancing partnership with another person. Only when we love ourselves can we love others realistically, instead of seeing them as fantasy figures, projections of our own desire.

No one can hurt us emotionally unless we allow the hurt. We're full partners in everything that we do, and taking responsibility for our actions and our desires is our first step toward being fully lovable.

The only one who can save me is me.

You are reading from the book:

The Promise of a New Day by Karen Casey and Martha Vanceburg

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

I couldn't hit a wall with a six-gun, but I can twirl one. It looks good.
--John Wayne

Many of us fake emotions because our past experiences never taught us how to use boundaries when dealing with feelings. Now we are oftentimes stumped when it comes to knowing how we should feel or act when we are faced with emotional situations.

Sometimes we need to learn to "fake it till we make it." What is asked of us is to act the part until the part becomes us.

We may not know how to feel anticipation around holidays - but we want to experience joy. We may not know what it feels like to really trust someone, but we would love to be in that position. What we can learn to do is "act as if" - working all the time to liberate the frozen emotions of years gone by - until we actually do experience what we seek.

Like new shoes, my new behaviors and feelings will feel stiff and uncomfortable for a little while. I am willing to live through the "breaking in" period.

You are reading from the book:

Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

One day at a time.

*****
You've got to give time, time.

*****
Insanity:
Doing exactly the same thing over and over,
expecting different results.

*****
The Serenity Prayer is the handrail to grab
until you can work the Steps.

You are reading from the book:

My Mind Is Out to Get Me by Dr. Ron B.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Patience is needed with everyone, but first of all with ourselves.
--Saint Francis De Sales

One night Sandra was having trouble putting a puzzle together. Angrily, she pushed all the pieces into a huge pile.

"I can't do this," she said. She got up and walked over to the couch and plopped down.

"Let me tell you a story," said her dad, as he sat down next to her. "There was a daughter who helped her dad take care of her baby sister. Again and again, she helped her baby sister stand and try to walk. One day the daughter tried to put a puzzle together but gave up after only a few tries. She had forgotten how many times she had helped her baby sister."

We are all like Sandra, sometimes. We forget to allow ourselves to fail, even though our growth up to now has been a series of failures that we've learned from. With patience, we allow ourselves to take chances we might not otherwise explore, and we widen our world of possibilities. Life has been patient with us so far, now it's our turn.

What have I failed at that I can try again today?

You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

He's making me crazy. I don't understand. Why would someone say they were going to do one thing, then do something so different from what they say? He looks so good and talks so good. His promises sound so, so real, but then everything falls apart. Then about the time I'm ready to blow a gasket, he calls, charms my socks off, and the whole cycle starts over again. I walk away, scratching my head and wondering, What's wrong with me? Did I just imagine this whole thing? Did I overact? I don't get it, I don't understand.

Maybe it's time for an Al-Anon meeting.

And when we're talking on the phone, I feel like I'm the only one for him. But then when I see him, I know he's lying to me. I know he's seeing someone else and standing there looking me right in the eyes and lying about it. I don't understand why I feel so insane.

Maybe it's time for an Al-Anon meeting.

And then I catch him straight-out lying to me, and I blow up. I just can't stand that lying stuff, especially when I knew all the time he was lying to me and he denied it. I put up with it and put up with it and then finally I can't take it anymore. By the time I blow up, he's standing there looking calm and serene and I'm acting like an insane person.

It's not you, It's him. How about that meeting?

Oh yeah. That Al-Anon meeting.

"Step One: Powerless over people, places, and things. My life has become unmanageable." Take a deep breath. Say it again. Then say it one more time.

Detach in love. Disentangle. Un-embroil yourself from other people's insanity so you can be restored to sanity. It's a value many of us learned the hard way.

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Conscious Contact by Melody Beattie

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Many people think they can't paint, but I think everyone has artistic ability of some kind.
-- Eva Wines

Many of us probably don't agree with Eva, particularly if we haven't tried to paint or weave or write or throw pots. We mistakenly think that others have talent, never ourselves, but that's because we misunderstand what talent means. Talent is really just an inclination; it develops from a desire to pursue some activity that we then proceed to cultivate with a passion. It's not mysterious. It doesn't just happen. We persevere because we feel good when involved in the activity. When we define talent this way, we realize how right Eva is. It's just that many of us haven't followed our passion yet.

Coming to understand that we do, indeed, have talent, that it has simply lain dormant until now, is perhaps one of the most exciting aspects of our lives presently. If we haven't yet realized this, dare to believe it now. It will change every minute of the rest of your life.

Today is a good day to pursue one of my dreams.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Anger helps straighten out a problem like a fan helps straighten out a pile of papers.
--Susan Marcotte

Some of us have temper tantrums. Like black clouds, we threaten an outburst at any moment. Other people learn to check us out for storm warnings. They want time to clear out or at least to put on a protective covering. We've caught them by surprise before, and they didn't like it. Now they've learned to watch out - to stay on their toes when we're around. Intimidating people, making them glad when we're not around so they can relax, is a poor way to relate to others.

And what do the outbursts do for us? Is there a cheap sense of power or control for a few minutes? Are we advertising to the world that we're short on coping skills? Or do we tell ourselves that letting off steam is necessary once in a while, conveniently forgetting the steam blasting in other people's faces?

No tirade ever solved a problem. Anger is not a strategy. We don't have the right to rain on other people's parades. Our program can teach us better ways to deal with our anger - with honesty and fairness to ourselves and others.

Today, I ask my Higher Power for a peaceful and honest heart.

You are reading from the book:

Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Suffering is a journey which has an end.
--Matthew Fox

Pain is part of life. To live a spiritual life, we need a way to understand the suffering we sometimes endure. Looking back at other difficult times can give us a better perspective of the pain we feel today. All of us can recall a loss or a sudden difficult change that we never would have chosen for ourselves. Perhaps it brought us face to face with insecurities or doubts about our survival. Now, after the suffering has ended, we see how much we grew. We changed; we were strengthened and, perhaps, were liberated by what happened to us.

Thoughts about today's suffering may not be clear as to what good it holds for us. But we are on a journey, and it can only happen one step at a time. We know that journeys teach us great lessons and they do have endings. Our pain today affirms that we are vital and alive people. We know others suffer as we do, and we can turn to each other to give and receive comfort while we are on the journey.

My pain will teach me something I need to know, and it will have an end. I will pay attention to its lessons.

You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Clarity

I know better than to not trust God. But sometimes, I forget that.

When we are in the midst of an experience, it is easy to forget that there is a Plan. Sometimes, all we can see is today.

If we were to watch a weaver sewing a tapestry for only a few moments, and focused on only a small piece of the work, it would not look beautiful. It would look like a few peculiar threads randomly placed. How often we use that same, limited perspective to look at our life - especially when we are going through a difficult time.

We can learn to have perspective when we are going through those confusing, difficult learning times. When we are being pelted by events that make us feel, think, and question, we are in the midst of learning something important.

We can trust that something valuable is being worked out in us - even when things are difficult, even when we cannot get our bearings. Insight and clarity do not come until we have mastered our lesson.

Faith is like a muscle. It must be exercised to grow strong. Repeated experiences of having to trust what we can't see and repeated experiences of learning to trust that things will work out, are what makes our faith muscles grow strong.

Today, I will trust that the events in my life are not random. My experiences are not a mistake. The Universe, my Higher Power, and life are not picking on me. I am going through what I need to go through to learn something valuable, something that will prepare me for the joy and love I am seeking.

You are reading from the book:

The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Love is the best motivation. When we are plugged in to our Higher Power, we are plugged in to love. It flows through us like a current, energizing our sluggish hearts and minds.

As we work the Steps of this program, we are given increased ability to love. By turning over our lives and our wills, we become receptive to the love which surrounds and sustains us. By taking inventory and being ready to have our character defects removed, we are able to get rid of old ways of thinking and acting which have been blocking out love.

We cannot produce love for others by ourselves, but we can receive it from our Higher Power. We can even receive love for people we don't particularly like.

Love gives energy for action and directs its course. May I grow in love.

You are reading from the book:

Food for Thought by Elisabeth L.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Happiness is not a matter of events; it depends upon the tides of the mind.
--Alice Meynell

It's all too easy to blame a friend, spouse, or co-worker for the uneven quality of our lives. If only others would behave according to our plans and dictates, then all would go well, we think. What seldom is remembered or even understood is that each of us has an individual perspective on any single event - our own. We need to stretch our minds and hearts to understand an experience from another's point of view. However, we need never fully understand how another perceives life. We need only to accept that another's perspective is legitimate.

Our happiness is not dependent on the perceptions or the actions of someone else. Nor is it dependent on attention, or lack of it, from a loved one. Our occupation may be challenging and fulfilling; however, the joy we get from it depends on the attitude we carry to the job. In every way, whether in the company of others or by ourselves, we make our own happiness.

My opportunity for happiness is guaranteed if I opt for it today.

You are reading from the book:

The Promise of a New Day by Karen Casey and Martha Vanceburg

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Don't be a Victim

Some people refer to us as victims of our problems, but we should not accept such labeling. A better term for us is survivors.

Working in step with our Higher Power, we should view ourselves as capable of rising above all the challenges and conditions that confront us. If we call ourselves victims, we'll soon be inviting more people and situations to victimize us. As survivors, however, we will always learn to sail through the roughest storms.

Looking at the general world situation, it does seem realistic to say that lots of people are victims. But we must always take into account the vast power that resides in every human soul. People have tremendous power to change their conditions, and when word of this finally gets around, we'll see a worldwide spiritual awakening that will change everything for the better.

Whatever I'm facing today, I'll know that the spirit within me also gives me the qualities I need to survive.

You are reading from the book:

Walk in Dry Places by Mel B.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Walk. Don't walk.
--Traffic Light

Signs direct us on our way in life. Traffic lights tell us to walk (or not), Golden Arches point us to dinner, geese flying south herald the coming winter, flashing neon tells us what to buy. We know how to read these signs of worlds and weather; they help to guide us on our journey.

We can learn to read the signs of human beings, too, to be detectives of the human spirit. Laugh lines around eyes and mouth, the texture of hands, tension in jaws and shoulders can tell much about a person, if we stop to look. All around us are signs that tell us others feel the pain and joy we feel, others need us as we need them, we are understood, and we are not alone.

The marvelous bonus in learning to read these signs in others is that we can begin to let ourselves be read, also.

You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

All things pass... Patience attains all that it strives for.
-- St. Teresa of Avila

Some days, it seems like our struggles will never end. The pain, the loss, the heartaches, the failures we can recount them all. Where is the strength to go on?

What if we began our day by acknowledging that all things pass? That given time, effort, and patience, we can accept or accomplish most anything? But patience does not mean complacency. On the contrary, each day in recovery requires a new attitude, a new outlook that in time generates its own positive energy for growth and change.

We need strength and patience not only in the difficult moments, but in the easier ones - the days of comfort when things seem to be going almost too well.

Soon, we can look back across the months and see growth. As the skills of the dancer or the carpenter increase with time and patience, so do our skills in recovery. As we grow in recovery, becoming ever more patient, we become ever more in tune with our Higher Power and the promise of a new life.

Today grant me the patience to live in the moment. Help me be willing to believe that all things pass and I can live better in sobriety.

You are reading from the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous