When I was new in recovery, there were many days when I felt I just wasnt going to make it. I would see others take chips and cakes on their anniversaries, and I was pretty sure Id be drunk tomorrow. When I met with my sponsor, he told me that even if I couldnt see the progress I was making, others could. When he saw my look of disbelief, he asked if I was sober that day. I told him I was, and he told me the program was working for me even if it didnt feel like it.
As I made my way through the Steps, it continued to be a roller coaster ride. Sometimes the pink cloud returned and I was filled with hope and gratitude. But other times I descended into the pit of despair and felt like I was going backward. During these dark times, my sponsor told me to just hold on. Dont drink today, and I guarantee it will pass, he said. And it always did.
After many years of sobriety, there are still times in life when I dont feel as though Im making the progress I would like. What Ive learned is that it is okay to just hold on during these times. I have found the solution is for me to stay sober, turn things over to God, get grateful for what I do have, and be open for what His will is next for me. Each time I do this, I find that holding on is actually part of the process that leads to the progress I was hoping for.
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Copyright @ 2017 Michael Z
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
