"I wanted to be famous but God made me anonymous."
I had some pretty big plans when I entered the program. Even though my sponsor told me it wasn't about money, property and prestige, I knew better. I was convinced that, being sober, I would finally write the books and create the products that would get me the recognition and riches I deserved. I even told my sponsor how good of a circuit speaker I would be and asked what I needed to do that. He smiled and suggested that a year of sobriety might be a good start.
As I began working the program, I made some startling revelations. In doing inventories, I found that there was a time when I had a lot of money, property and prestige, but I was still miserable. As I did more work, I discovered that the hole I felt inside could never be filled up with anything outside me, and the more I chased that, the emptier I felt. It was only when I surrendered the character defect of feeling terminally unique that I began to feel better.
One of the truest things I've learned in the program is that I will always feel less than when I compare my insides with someone else's outsides. It has taken years, but I now understand why character building and my spiritual connection must come ahead any outside success if I'm to be happy. And I now appreciate the powerful role anonymity has played in helping me develop these essential qualities.
Today I understand the folly of wanting to be famous, and the wisdom of Gods anonymity.
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Copyright @ 2017 Michael Z
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'