"About this slip business-- I would not be too discouraged. I think you are suffering a great deal from a needless guilt. For some reason or other, the Lord has laid out tougher paths for some of us, and I guess you are treading on of them. God is not asking us to be successful. He is only asking us to try to be. That, you surely are doing, and have been doing. So I would not stay away from AA through any feeling of discouragement or shame. It's just the place you should be. Why don't you try just as a member? You don't have to carry the whole AA on your back, you know!
"It is not always the quantity of good things you do, it is also the quality that counts.
Bill's wisdom is certainly for the ages ... He still never ceases to amaze me ... his understanding of the alcoholic and a power greater than ourselves and his use of that power to communicate such wisdom to us is noth'n short of a miracle in and of itself ... and I feel it will stand the test of time ...
Pappy
__________________
'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
For some reason or other, the Lord has laid out tougher paths for some of us, and I guess you are treading on of them.
Letter, 1958
This thinking has always been such a shady subject in my rattler. Most of us had a family or friend that did not make it out alive (probably multiple people) and I can't help but to wonder why that angel of mercy was on my shoulder and not theirs. Those people seemed larger than life and were hip and cool. I was just a loner and pathetic drunk that holed up in an apartment eating leftover tv dinners scratching my nuts.
The gift of being waist deep in the aa process is your perception shifts after some work and those moments of clarity last longer. Maybe my loner status as a drunk was keeping me alive, not out driving ending up at the bottom of a river? Never know.
Bill's wisdom is certainly for the ages ... He still never ceases to amaze me ... his understanding of the alcoholic and a power greater than ourselves and his use of that power to communicate such wisdom to us is noth'n short of a miracle in and of itself ... and I feel it will stand the test of time ...
Pappy
Maybe someone can tell me why alcoholics don't act like that is true anymore?
- Some say that the 3rd step is merely about making "a decision" --- if only they would read the Big Book!
- I have heard one say several times that the 3rd step "decision" is a "decision" to do the 4th step --- if only he would read the Big Book!
- Some say that "character defects" and "shortcomings" aren't the same --- if only they would read the Big Book or pick up a dictionary!
- Some say that the 4th step and 10th step inventories aren't the same --- if only they would read 4th step discussion in the Big Book!
- Some say that a 12 step program is a 12 step program --- if only they would read the long form of the Traditions or even just read the first step! Why not just one 12 step program or we bring back the Oxford group?
- I have heard one metaphorically pound his fist on the table at least twice insisting he has the right to say anything he wants before discussing some of the details of his incestuous relationship --- if only he would remember that he doesn't have the right to be selfish and make others uncomfortable or if only he would read the Big Book regarding how to do a 5th step!
The 5th chapter of the Big Book tells us we must be rigorously honest and our tokens say "To Thine Own Self Be True" which means we should be true to our own principles, at least those we adopted when we became members of AA. What happened to the prime directive that we go out and live a sober life (in accordance with a good conscience and the principles of AA)?
In the same way that Bill W. was concerned about the collapse of AA when we to ignore AA's singleness of purpose, I believe that we are looking at a slow collapse of the AA program when we are untrue to AA's principles: "We have to confine our membership to alcoholics and we have to confine our A.A. groups to a single purpose. If we don't stick to these principles, we shall almost surely collapse. And if we collapse, we cannot help anyone."