Even after its inception, A.A. - with all its glowing endorsements - still remains a work in progress. As the largest recovery outlet for the last 80+ years, AA still manages to provide a welcome relief to countless victims around the globe. AA will, of course, have its detractors, here and abroad, yet it still remains a positive force in the treatment of active alcoholism.  I'm only one out of a handful of recipients who not only experience this magnificent reality firsthand, but live out the principles of recovery every single day. I'm so blessed to be a part of this wonderful fellowship and so are you.

Sobriety has always been an exercise in humility. For more than a decade, I've reflected positively on the virtues of sustainable recovery. The beginning, however, felt more like a 'De Facto' state of war than a step in the right direction. It was a nerve wracking exploration in human emotions. I followed that elusive first drink more times than I could remember. After 14+ years of continuous sobriety, I can honestly say it wasn't without regret. There were times when I felt like a complete washout, maybe a dropout even. I had to drag myself back to this thing with nothing more than the particular words I use to describe failure. I also spent some time in limbo, encountered a few more scrapes and even suffered a heartbreaking loss due to my overzealous bravado, but at some point it became crystal clear -something had to change.

Letting go was the hardest thing to do. Getting over myself felt equally difficult,  but those two things -combined with a ridiculous amount of rest and some time alone in the wilderness- have given me a whole new perspective on life. I've vowed to do things completely different. I actually swore to start living, really living, and not drum up past mistakes with reckless abandon. It took a long time to breathe normal again and not run away from those gnawing insecurities. I had to wear out those demons every single day, whether in the rooms or during my daily travels. Tough stuff, I know, but the alternative is just as pitiful. I only hope it proves worthy just for today.

Then, came the moment we all anticipate; the moment where sobriety and callous reasoning collide. I found myself surrounded by two equally challenging dilemmas - the virtues of the AA program and the neurotic fixations of a broken down alcoholic. Keeping the buzz going was one thing, but maintaining sobriety was something completely different. My breath becomes fragile with awe, as the anticipation of lifelong recovery continues to unfold. I became painfully aware of just how much life has changed. There were no more hangovers, no public shaming, and no broken flask pressed against my side. I am no longer choked by the debts of bad judgment or saddled anymore with neurotic fixations, big or small. It's the moment I've always dreamed of - the one where a drink is the last thing on my mind.

As we celebrate this moment, let us all reflect on the virtues that make this program truly unique. Individuals from all walks of life continue to support this program in some unique way. Without this forum or recovery programs like A.A, where would we all be? That may seem like a rhetorical question to some, but in our own unique way it makes A.A. what it is today. Oh, one last thing: It feels good to be home. I hope that sentiment is continues.  Onward...