There is one meeting in my area which I have heard about and haven't been to--yet. Everything is very formal. I have heard they even roll out a red carpet for people attending it. Had I heard it from one member--I would have thought he was joking. I have heard it twice. Men have to wear ties and women have to dress in Sunday attire. These days people attend church in jeans, so I feel like they mean more formal than that. I am not sure if that is just for the homegroup member or everyone though. No one is allowed to get up during the meeting and get coffee. And I have heard that they have a bunch of food all laid out for each weekly meeting.
It sounds a bit stuffy for me. I don't know, maybe I am being "stuffy" for not giving it a try. I was wondering if anyone has ever heard of this type of AA meeting where they live?
Well, of course I would be very interested in giving it a try, just to see what it was all about! And if all the reports were true. If I did not approve of this excessive formality once I arrived, I have to remember that every group is autonomous. If this is what they want to do and it's helping them stay sober to dress up and lay out a buffet, who am I to say it's inappropriate? There are other meetings I can attend if I don't feel comfortable. I kind of hope you'll visit this unusual meeting, hopefulone, and keep us posted! Who knows, you may end up wanting to keep attending meetings there.
Yeah, I hope you check it out. I know of a group that sounds like that in my home town. The description of the group in terms of the impressions of an individual will depend on how that individual perceives things.
The group I am thinking of could be described as stuffy, overly formal, rigid, controling, too organised.
But having been there, and over the years seen the results this group gets, I would describe it as well organised, on message, considerate of those who attend by insisting on a standard of courtesy to all the group (don't get coffee while someone is sharing), a provider of opportunity for their members to learn and experience all aspects of AA, group servants are competent to do the jobs they do because the group supports them and trains them, the groups makes a good contribution to AA as a whole, and actively carries its message to the acoholic who still suffers. They provide sponsorship and fellowship. The group activities extend beyond merely holding a meeting.
If I have a need for assistance with a 12 step situation, this is the group I ask and they always respond. Most of our other "groups" are really just meetings with an ever changing parade of faces. It is almost impossible to get 12 step help from most of them.
By their works you shall know them. Look beyond shallow descriptions and see what the group actually does for its members. You may be surprised.
Most unrecovered alcoholics hate commitment and responsibility, so they are not overly keen on well organised group when there is an easier less disciplined path open to them.
Well, I have a different attitude about it now since you both posted your thoughts. I never thought of any of that. I formed my own "judgements". And I know one of the things that I let bother me is when those "parade of faces" change like you said Fyne Spirit. I love seeing the same folks--as wells as new ones--at the meetings and get concerned and missed them when they stop coming. And I love what you shared about courtesy, opportunity--well, just all of what you said, FS and you too, emmi331. It has given me a whole new perspective about attending now. Thanks to both of you.
Zoomtopz,
That meeting sure wouldn't work for this drunk. I tried getting sober on my own several times--without God and the Steps I would be empty inside--as empty as I was when I was drinking. I don't want that "emptiness" anymore.
I have to say I love study meetings. Though I know I SHOULD be re-reading my Big Book every day, I don't always. My first sponsor told me, "If you want to sponsor others, you need to keep your nose in the literature, so you know what you're talking about." I agree with this. Right now I go to a study meeting once a week; we're currently finishing up the stories in the back of the book, and will be starting at the beginning again soon. Some study groups skip the stories, which is okay, but this one does not; I'm glad, because I think they carry a powerful message.
-- Edited by emmi331 on Thursday 17th of December 2015 09:18:04 AM
I love study meetings, too, emmi331. I go to a Step Meeting once or twice a week. I started to talk myself out of going to it the other day because "I was busy"....then I had this strong feeling I couldn't let go of that I had to go to that meeting. I am so glad I did. I have never been to one where they read the stories in the back of the book, but they prob. have one around here somewhere.
