Sorry everyone for being away for so long, not had a good time of lately, thought i'd hit my rock bottom until last Monday...really did it this time. But that is in the past and now things are on the up, my husband and i have never been closer, i've been a fab mum of late, were moving house(as our house now hasnt been a home for a long time), we're all looking forward to the future and a new home, and finally...i have now been sober for 6days. Had a really down day today tho, was crying all morning and extremely confused, but this afternoon have got stuck into housework and am now feeling extremely tired but not weepy. We're living at my mother and father in laws house which is a bit stressful, but all trying our best, and speaking to my higher power everyday to give me and my family strength, so please dont be dissappointed in me, as me and my husband are looking forward and see the events which happened last week, as a blessing in disguise. Just for today i havent wanted a drink. Night night all, Karen xx
Hi Karen.... Sorry you have had a rough time. Housework is good. Come on over here to my place if you run out of things to do...LOL...just kidding of course. Just wanted to tell you that in this program, you do not really have to worry about "disappointing" anyone. Please please, try not to think like I have for most of my life. That has caused me to feel worse more times than I can count when I felt like I didn't live up to others expectations of me. I had gotten out of a great part of that nonsense after working the Steps and trying to focus on pleasing my HP, and then I started slipping back into that old way of thinking. Got off track and well, you prob. read all that. Hopefully, I won't get derailed again.
You are doing great! Bad days are normal. It is what we choose to do when things don't go as we'd like and if we don't always make the wisest decisions, we have the choice to try harder the next minute, hour, day. Sometimes we have to drink that lemonade we made out of all those lemons--no matter how sour it is....we just try not to add that alcohol to it thinking it is going to make it better.
"Progress not perfection". We're human. No one should make any judgement of you, me or anyone...especially in AA.
So glad to hear from you. I think about you often.
-- Edited by hopefulone on Sunday 4th of October 2015 02:25:29 PM
Kaz, we are glad you are still working your recovery program.
Do not underestimate the power of the 24 hours approach to AA recovery. If you are sober today, you are doing pretty well. Tomorrow, well, tomorrow you can work on the next 24 hours.
There is no cause for us to be disappointed in you. You do not need forgiveness from us. We are all equal, ever subject to the possibility of the same dangers and compulsions.
We know what you've been through because we have the same affliction.
Keep up the good work. We are all pulling for you.
I've been 'out of pocket' for a couple days ... so it's great to come back and see your post ... you will have some difficult days ahead, but I pray the worst is over for you ... please be sure to call someone if you get a little shaky, or come here and talk with us ...
Please try your best to get to your meetings daily for now ... it's the only thing that got me through those first few months ... trust me, it's the only way to get your sanity back and to be able to love yourself and your family again ... you are in my daily prayers ...
I want your daughter to have the best mommy around ... and your husband to have the best wife there is ...
Love you and God Bless, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
