Hi, I'm new to this site. I was googling ADHD and the 4th and 5th Steps and found this site. I have ADHD, diagnosed before I got sober, I have 2 1/2 years sober and had a hard time getting my 4th step written out because it's hard for me to think in chronological order. My 1st "5th Step" didn't go so well,. I had a new sponsor, it lasted about 45 mins and I felt worse after. I'm currently doing a back to basics workshop and did part of my 5th resentments yesterday, but not all . The person I'm doing it with is having a hard time following me, anyone without ADHD would. My brain skips all over the place. In a post someone mentioned someone named Pinkchip who works with people with ADHD, but I don't know how to get in touch with anyone specifically on here. Has anyone else had a really hard time with these 2 because of ADHD? I'm afraid that if I don't get it all out this time, I won't make it. As they say, you're as sick as your secrets. We're on a timeline for this step, only a few hours tonight. If anyone can help I would be so grateful. Thank you
PS sorry for any typos, I'm writing this from my phone.
To get a private message to Pinkchip, click on 'User Details' above right, and select 'New Message' in the left tool box ... then type in Pinkchip in the 'send to' box and then type your message ...
Some of us come here several times a day and some come here 2 or 3 times a week ... so try not expect an immediate response ... not unless someone is expecting your message ...
Congrats on 2 1/2 years sober ... getting the 4 and 5th steps done is certainly better done 'sooner' rather than later, for sure ... let us know how you're do'n ...
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
I did not do my 4th and 5th steps in chronological order. I couldn't. I was jumping all over the place myself. I just did the best I could and got what I could get written down as they came to my mind. My sponsor didn't tell me they had to be in order and I am glad. I too would have had a very difficult time doing so. I have never been tested for ADHD however, I have a strong feeling I do have it myself and have had family members tell me they think I do.
I wish you the best of luck.
BTY
Welcome louanne....I don't think I could have done a thorough 4th step in a couple hours...And I know if it took me 4 years...I'd be dead. There is a happy medium. If I could suggest something...It would be to do the best you can with the workshop 4 and 5th steps...Ask for you HP's help in doing so. They mention in the directions....
Perhaps there is a better way - we think so. For we are now on a different basis; the basis of trusting and relying upon God. We trust infinite God rather than our finite selves.
pg 68
They mention asking for God's help quite a bit in the directions...I know I couldn't have done it without it. Maybe when you get it all down on paper...Something will come up in your fifth step discussion you missed.....Ask for help with that. And do the best you can. If you feel the need to do them again with a new sponsor...Maybe you won't....You always can. Don't worry about the order...The key is not intentionally witholding something. Trust God...As you understand God....Ask for help....And clean house.
Thank you all so much for the guidance and suggestions! I have done the best I can for now and will be finishing the 5th Step (what I have for now) tonight. Being the typical alcoholic I am, I needed the remainder that it doesn't have to be perfect, it's not all or nothing, and that my HP will guide me. I'll update later and let you know how it went. Again, thanks so much for the support and encouragement!
Beautiful...Sending you prayers for honesty, openmindedness and willingness louanne....You can never have too much of those.....Love to hear how it goes...Somehow I see better results than your first attempt.
The step is to make sense to you and your hp...The other person will witness it but it's for you really. There are non addictive meds for adhd such as straterra. You don't have to suffer without treatment. Also, it may not need to be totally chronological. What about major categories of early childhood, adolescence, young adult, and adult?
-- Edited by pinkchip on Tuesday 25th of March 2014 06:52:08 PM
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
I have been doing the Steps for nearly 25 yrs. I think I may be getting better at them ......
The thing that means so much to me is where it says in HOW IT WORKS "There are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest".
I started getting honest and getting to work. like the oldtimers told me:
Great post and subject...I also am ADHD and have done 6 4th steps and therefore fifths too. Attention Deficit is a real defect and what I learned to do is slow down and be patient while also keeping up my determination to live the program. I never leaned the time limit either so that was grace. I did my last 9th step apology 22 years after I committed the wrong doing and it took almost that long to focus and remember it. You'll make it if you don't take that first drink which means working steps 1 2 and 3 habitually. Keep on with the practice. (((((hugs)))))
Good morning Louanne...I hope your fifth step went well for you. You are going to hear a lot of things in meetings...As well as on this site....That just aren't true. That aren't in the clear - cut directions contained in the book. I hear them all the time.....One thing I go by is how they recovered....Exactly. If I can't find it in the book....I disregard it.
On page 25 they mention...
There is a solution. Almost none of us liked the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process requires for its successful consummation.
What they are saying here...Is there is an endpoint...A successful consummation....From the process of self searching (Step 4)....Confession of our shortcomings (Step 5)...Leveling of our pride...(Steps 6 through 9.)
The goal we want to reach..
Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps
We hear the promises read in meetings as well the ones in step 10 about the problem being removed...All come after working the first 9 steps. One time. If we've had this spiritual awakening. This entire psychic change. The action has been taken. No where does it say they need to be taken again...ADHD or not. In fact they tell us this....
If we have carefully followed directions, we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us. To some extent we have become God-conscious.
That is from page 85...Right after we've done the ninth step. If we haven't followed directions carefully...Then maybe there is a need to take them again.
Sounds to me like you are following them just fine. Keep moving forward.....And I suggest you do what I did....Because I heard a lot of things that confused me early on....Stick with the directions in the book.
