"I lived to be forgotten because I'd forgotten how to live"
Joseph Meyering, Sr.
(I talked myself into believing that my life was meaningless. I had lived to be in my early 50's and I felt like a complete loser. I couldn't understand why I was allowed to live so long and have feelings of such complete worthlessness. I had always had thoughts that it would be nice to have confidence in myself and be happy in life. I never seemed to get there, though. I had put trust and faith in alcohol for so long to make me feel better about myself. I thought I had to have it to get through each day. Since I have been sober, I have learned that I trusted and depended on the wrong thing. Alcohol wasn't the "friend" I thought it was for so long. It betrayed me over and over. The longer I drank and the more I drank the more problems I had. When I finally realized and admitted to myself that I was powerless over it and accepted the fact that there was a power greater than myself that could help me stop drinking, my life dramatically changed. I stopped drinking and am learning how to live again. My life is meaningful. I am not a loser and worthless after all. My confidence is being restored day by day and I am happier than I have been in years and years. I don't have any faith in alcohol and don't need it in my life to feel better about myself, nor do I have to have it to get through each day. Alcohol isn't any friend at all. It is my enemy and I cannot allow it to betray me anymore.I know how to live again. It's a really great feeling, too! My faith is now where it should be...in my Higher Power, who is God for me, who is helping me stay sober day by day. My friends are other alcoholics who I meet in the rooms of AA and on this board, who support me, as I do them, in an effort to recover from alcoholism. I am a grateful recovering alcoholic.)
My faith is now where it should be...in my Higher Power, who is God for me, who is helping me stay sober day by day. My friends are other alcoholics who I meet in the rooms of AA and on this board, who support me, as I do them, in an effort to recover from alcoholism. I am a grateful recovering alcoholic.)
BTY
It is my belief that our 'faith' is only in its infancy ... we must cultivate it daily to get where it is we seek to be ... there is always room for faith to grow ...
Great post BTY ... does my heart good to see your continuing progress ... and it is helping me to see more things in my life that could use some improvement ...
Love ya and God Bless,
Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
I realized later after I re-read my posting (I still second guess so much of what I post, emails I send, etc., because I am worried I won't express what I am feeling or will word it the wrong way. Always have had that issue with myself.) Anyway, I realized when I read "my faith is where it needs to be...." that some might interpret it to mean I was happy with the degree of faith I have (which I know I need to work on and become more spiritual which I realize will take daily work and a lot more praying on my part). I should simply have said that I am happy thatI have faith in God and not in alcohol anymore.
I truly felt this is what you meant in your 1st post ... I really wanted to express to others that our faith, like our AA program and principles, needs daily attention and practice, else we tend to 'rest on our laurels' ... ... ... meaning sometimes we get the false feeling that we have arrived at our destination and can let up on our spiritual program, we can't do that ... that becomes a danger sign when we do ...
I knew what you meant, I just wanted to expand that thought ... you're do'n great ... love seeing your posts ...
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Big Smiley Face to You Pappy....
I have heard others share that "I've got this" in the meetings.
If that works for them, I am happy for them.
For me, however, I don't ever want to tell myself "I got this"....I know me well enough to know that when I think I've "got" something, I usually either don't really have it like I think or do, or like you mentioned "rest on my laurels" and get lazy and have to pay for it later. I want to keep working at it (and as you have read from postings by me, I am not working as hard as I need to for that matter).
Thanks bunches, Pappy, and love ya!
