Before recovery, I spent much of my past life feeling less than others. I wanted to be more and do more, but I always felt that other people had more intelligence, more talents, better skills, and greater achievements than I. In some cases, I was absolutely right. In life, we'll always find that there's someone smarter, or faster, or better than ourselves. But, as I lived my life continuing to compare myself to others, I grew to be more jealous and found myself disliking more and more people...and disliking myself more and more. By the time I was ready for this Program, life was one humiliation after another, and I had such low self-esteem that I really despised myself.
Then, through working the Steps with a sponsor, I humbled myself before God, and that was when His Power came in to my life. As soon as I acknowledged my weakness, I was filled with Power. That was when I discovered that my Pride was the source of all my low self-esteem. The fact is, God has done more in me and through me than I've ever been able to achieve myself. Today I can be comfortable with who I am, and love others for who they are. That makes for a much happier me.
