A husband walks into Victoria 's Secret to purchase a sheer negligee for his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price -- the more sheer, the higher the price.
Naturally, he opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500 and takes it home. He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on and model it for him.
Upstairs the wife thinks (she's no dummy???), 'I have an idea. It's so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, but I'll do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for myself.' (What???!!)
She appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose. The husband says, 'Good Grief! You'd think for $500, they'd at least iron it!'
He never heard the shot.
Funeral on Thursday at Noon. Closed casket.
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Hey Pappy...do you know this woman? If so, can you see if she still has that thing and will sell it to me for $50 since it doesn't sound like she needs it anymore? I can wear it while watching my comedies and eating my Snickers bar........
OK....seriously, that is too funny and I cannot believe I haven't heard this one or the other 100 you just posted.....shows me I have really fallen behind on the jokes department. again (And never mind about the "garment"...I just realized I need a little ironing, too, and it is much more satisfying to eat my chocolate without looking at the repercussions of eating my chocolate.
-- Edited by betterthanyesterday52 on Monday 3rd of February 2014 07:53:29 PM
Hey Pappy...do you know this woman? If so, can you see if she still has that thing and will sell it to me for $50 since it doesn't sound like she needs it anymore? I can wear it while watching my comedies and eating my Snickers bar........
OK....seriously, that is too funny and I cannot believe I haven't heard this one or the other 100 you just posted.....shows me I have really fallen behind on the jokes department. again (And never mind about the "garment"...I just realized I need a little ironing, too, and it is much more satisfying to eat my chocolate without looking at the repercussions of eating my chocolate.
-- Edited by betterthanyesterday52 on Monday 3rd of February 2014 07:53:29 PM
We men are not immune from needing an iron either, LOL ... and I won't bother to mention other parts that have succom to gravity's pull, LOL ... 'chocolate' IS the great 'distractor' ... yummmmm !
__________________
'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
and I cannot believe I haven't heard this one or the other 100 you just posted.....shows me I have really fallen behind on the jokes department.