Welcome June, glad you're here ... sounds like you're looking for a solution of some kind ... if it happens to be an alcohol problem, then you've found the right place to join in ... there are a bunch of miracles among us on this board ... we've managed to box-in the demon alcohol and go about improving our lives here ... IF you're seeking what we sought, then let the healing begin ...
If you think you may have a problem with alcohol, chances are, you do ... ... ... here, and in the rooms of AA, we learn the solution to our dilemma ... there is a 'healing force' among us ... stick around and see how we did it ...
Love ya and God Bless, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
I like that saying...if you think you may have a problem with alcohol, chances are you do.....thank you for sharing that with me. I needed to hear that.
I am going to go to a meeting this evening. I know what I have to do, but it is still hard work.
June - there is so much power in surrender - The whole "Can't beat em, might as well join em" worked well for me. I started seeing it as a gift to be able to identify as a sober alcoholic and to be around other sober alcoholics. It stopped being my shameful problem and AA was where I went for the solution.
I don't want to talk you out of going to meetings but, honestly, I generally assume everyone at meetings is an alcoholic regardless of if the meeting is open or closed. I know there are some that go to learn because of family, spouses, friends, and there are some students periodically but 99 percent are there for their drinking problems. Hence, the distinction of open vs. closed meeting is pointless if you have an issue of other's finding stuff out about you. Now if it's just you accepting the label of alcholic - well, I think that the requirement for closed meetings is basically if you think you have a problem with alcohol. It sounds like you are already there so you would be fine going to closed meetings even if you aren't ready to share "I am an alcoholic" out loud.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
Hey June, here are a few questions to help you with Step 1 ... ... ... 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol-that our lives had become unmanageable.
1. Do you require a drink the next morning?
2. Do you prefer to drink alone?
3. Do you lose time from work due to drinking?
4. Is your drinking harming your family in any way?
5. Do you crave a drink at a definite time daily?
6. Do you get the inner shakes unless you continue drinking?
7. Has drinking made you irritable?
8. Does drinking make you careless of your family's welfare?
9. Have you harmed your husband or wife since drinking?
10. Has drinking changed your personality?
11. Does drinking cause you bodily complaints?
12. Does drinking make you restless?
13. Does drinking cause you to have difficulty in sleeping?
14. Has drinking made you more impulsive?
15. Have you less self-control since drinking?
16. Has your initiative decreased since drinking?
17. Has your ambition decreased since drinking?
18. Do you lack perseverance in pursuing a goal since drinking?
19. Do you drink to obtain social ease? (In shy, timid, self-conscious individuals.)
20. Do you drink for self-encouragement? (In persons with feelings of inferiority.)
21. Do you drink to relieve marked feeling of inadequacy?
22. Has your sexual potency suffered since drinking?
23. Do you show marked dislikes and hatreds since drinking?
24. Has your jealousy, in general, increased since drinking?
25. Do you show marked moodiness as a result of drinking?
26. Has your efficiency decreased since drinking?
27. Has your drinking made you more sensitive?
28. Are you harder to get along with since drinking?
29. Do you turn to an inferior environment since drinking?
30. Is drinking endangering your health?
31. Is drinking affecting your peace of mind?
32. Is drinking making your home life unhappy?
33. Is drinking jeopardizing your business?
34. Is drinking clouding your reputation?
35. Is drinking disturbing the harmony of your life?
If you have answered YES to any one of the Test Questions, there is a definite warning that you may be alcoholic. If you have answered YES to any two of the Test Questions the chances are that you are an alcoholic.
If you answered YES to three or more of the Test Questions you are definitely AN ALCOHOLIC.
NOTE: The Test Questions are not A.A. Questions but are the guide used by Johns Hopkins University Hospital in deciding whether a patient is alcoholic or not.
In addition to the Test Questions we in A.A. would ask even more questions. Here are a few-
36. Have you ever had a complete loss of memory while, or after drinking?
37. Have you ever felt, when or after drinking, an inability to concentrate?
38. Have your ever felt "remorse" after drinking?
39. Has a physician ever treated you for drinking?
40. Have you ever been hospitalized for drinking?
Many other questions could be asked but the foregoing are sufficient for the purpose of this instruction.
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
WOW, that is quite a bunch of questions. I can answer YES to more than one of them.
Thank you for taking the time to point out those questions. It was very scary to read them. but even more scary are my answers. I guess I am not alone.
I guess it doesn't matter if I go to an open or closed meeting.
Hi June, Good Morning, and "June" is such a beautiful name..I just looked it up and although you may know this, it means.. "excited by change, adventure, and excitement. They are dynamic, visionary and versatile, able to make constructive use of freedom."
...it's great to have you here and I hope you know there is no reason to be fearful that others are going to know, find out, judge you about your drinking. Most of the people in our "open" meetings are alcoholics themselves and very few are there just to observe or that are family members to alcoholics. So you have really been doing what you are scared to do. Go to any meetings that you feel the most comfortable going to. An AA meeting is an AA meeting, whether open or closed. You are taking care of yourself and no one in those meetings is going to think bad of you for trying hard to take care of yourself. You remind me of me as I was scared to go to any meeting because of what others would think. Then I realized they are alcoholics like me and we're all there for the same reason--to stay sober. Please keep going and I hope you don't let your fears keep you from going. And there is no greater change, adventure, excitement and freedom than sobriety! Love and Hugs, BTY
if the disease yer tryin to hide and keep secret is alcoholism, its prolly not workin. yer goin to meetings where its not only a fellowship of alcoholics. its a fellowship of old bullshitters.
go to them closed meetings and yer prolly gonna see some of the faces ya see at open ones.
