Hi Pappy!  That posting about love smacked me in the head and took me right back to the forgiveness in my 4th and 5th Steps...and then in Step 9.  That's not a bad thing....it's a good thing.  Old dried up crap doesn't stink any more, and any of the crap I had in the past is old and dried up a long time ago.  It's been dealt with.  Here's what I'm talking about:  My mother died after I was born, so in order to help out my dad, my aunt and uncle raised me until I was 5 years old.  They loved me as if I was born to them, and treated me like their own child.  The household was filled with love and I felt constant love from them, and I felt a great love for them.  My dad came to visit regularly and we had much love for each other too.  In other words, love abounded everywhere in my life.  Even as a little kid, I knew what love looked like, smelled like, tasted like, and felt like.  Love and I were very familiar with each other.  Then, it all went away one day.  My dad finally got remarried and I was sent to live with him and his new wife and her two kids.  Long story short, the stepmother had no love for me....to put it mildly.  She didn't want me....but she had no choice but to let me stay because my dad wanted me.  The love that had once abounded in my life and filled my life was gone.  Until the day she died, my stepmother never did love me because I wasn't her own child.  But, I was able to gain her respect and admiration as an adult.  At Step 4, I had resentment for her that I had to take care of and I became able to find forgiveness.  That saved my ass.  Another thing I had to deal with was that protective "shield" I'd put around me all my life.  A survival thing I suppose.  Anyway, it was working the Steps that changed all of that inside me.  One thing I know is that EVERYBODY has something that hurt them as a child.  Few of us get to happy adulthood without some childhood hurt.  When I dealt with the hurt through the Steps, everything changed.  I have a wife and three kids who know I love them every day.  Hey...thanks for letting me share all this Pappy.  I liked it.  Blessings, Mike D.