Well, I woke up this morning. It's all still here. Landlord, room, mess, shoulder.
Last night I wanted to get drunk. The thing is that,,, even though we might not take a drink,,,, a dry drunk can be just as bad. I can do a great dry drunk,,,, carry on and all without the drink. That is just as much the reason I sat on my hands,,, to keep in emotional balance and confine myself to constructive behavior.
I thank you all for helping me to remember my program and to work it. I'm going to have to do the same thing today.
'Easy does it'
'Do my best and God does the rest'
'First things first'
'Step by Step'
amanda
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do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
Well you call it a dry drunk, I call them my "isms' Sometime I know I'm working on letting them in, and I will just take my little "isms" to a meeting, and for the most part, talk about it, and leave those little dark creatures, right there in the meeting room, and leave, get in my car, and feel they are not coming back with me for the drive home. It usually works for me by listening for a solution from out of someone else's stuff, totally unrelated to mine, but there is the answer, I needed to hear. Get back home feeling a lot more sober than when I left.
hope things are going a little better for you today, but if you cannot sleep in your own bedroom I can see the GRRRR. in that. To me our beds are our little sancuarys. So I will wish you the speediest way of getting back there. Do you know anyone that might give you a hand, if you asked??? Sounds like your shoulder needs to be protected.
Let us know how things are progressing.
Someone bought this beautiful coconut Palm Plant for Christmas, and I was not at home, he left it out on the edge of my driveway, unprotected by any covering. And when the temperature dropped to the very low 30s for three nights, i just went out to look at it, but it was so heavy, I could not move the poor plant in because of really bad neck and back problems that I keep under control by not lifting things that would pulls those nerves all to hell if I did. I finally had a friend, a woman who stopped by to say hello, and asked her to give me a hand, we both picked it up and finally got it inside. The lower baby leafs look pretty sad, but it did not die. I don't like asking any one for help, goes against my whatever. But I had to, or this really lovely gift was going to die.
It must be the coffee, I'm really in a bla, bla, bla mood, oh well, most of you are getting use to the long version, not the short, from me TeHe.
Did you Read Jens poem to us last nite, Made me laugh so hard, all the kindness that came my way last night, made be sleep well for the first time in a week.
I just call it LIFE. Shit happens. We get pissed. I know plenty of "normals" who'd have a drink over a realy bad day, difference is they can have A drink, I need a few 1000!!!
Feel better and hold on.
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* We eventually realize that just as the pains of alcoholism had to come before sobriety, emotional turmoil comes before serenity. *
