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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Alcoholics Anonymous -> Alcoholics Anonymous -> Old friendships, visiting each other families.
Post Info TOPIC: Old friendships, visiting each other families.
Pablomoses


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Old friendships, visiting each other families.
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confuse  Took a nap at 6pm.....not a good thing for sleeping the night through, so here goes some writing.

Hung out with my friend who I've known since he was three and his brother.  We are 48, his brother is 54.  We went to see their father, who they had just put in a home that specializes in dementia/Alzheimer's .

Hanging out in convalescent hospitals is pretty reality based.  If we don't die from something else, if our family can't/won't take care of us, or we're getting over some serious illness it's where we will end up.  I watched my father for 2 years and 11 months in a home like this/these,  Sometimes getting great care, sometimes getting awful care.

Their father was a physically abusive alcoholic during their entire childhood and into their adulthood.  To see them still love and care for him is amazing.  They are sober today.  AA/Al anon meetings have saved their lives in their own words.  I'm sure they feel conflicted about their father, yet, they showed him love and compassion.  I believe these meetings/rooms gave them the ability to look beyond what they went through in their lives, and be compassionate to a man who beat them and their mother regularly in an alcoholic and hung over haze.

It was quite a trip down memory lane.  I used to "numb out" when the beatings began.  He never hit me, but I did see a lot of beatings take place.  We all shared stories and common memories.  They lost a brother to a heroine OD, I lost a brother in a drunk driving accident.  It is not a club anyone wants to belong to.  Losing a sibling in their 20s and 30s because of an addiction is awful.  We discussed what those tragedies did to our family dynamics.  It was a good six hours that we spent together.

All in all, being with them was illuminating.  I came away with the fact that we all struggle.  Some get help and some continue to struggle.

We also visited my 56 year old brother who is still out there after numerous attempts at sobriety.  That is a subject of a whole other post. 

I guess I do have question for the forum.

 

Do you ever get amazed at the similarities that you discover from people in recovery?  Do you find those epiphany moments where you think to yourself, "wow, that is exactly how our family was?"  If not exactly, then it always seems to be very similar.

 

I am proud that my friends and I broke the cycle of addiction and are in recovery day by day.

I credit this program and my HP for getting me/us through for today

 



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Mike B.


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Thanks for the post Paul!  Being Graced by God and the power of The Program is a wonderful thing.  The foregiveness, love and tolerance is beyond belief sometimes.  We can let go of the past that weighs us down and live in The Moment.  Sharing our past without regret or shame.  We all have a past.  Everyone does!  I'm truly amazed by the love that comes from people who are in The Program and working it.  The most enjoyable people I know today.  The instant connection between two recovering Alcoholics is remarkable.  The connection quickly goes beneath the surface stuff to new and deeper levels.  Thank you for sharing your experience.  Stay well my friend! smile 



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gonee


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Thanks for sharing this. I need to be reminded how deadly this disease is. I thank God for good sponsorship, AA meetings and a solid 12 step program. Without these there would have been repeat devastation in my life.

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Stepchild


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Pablomoses wrote:

 Do you ever get amazed at the similarities that you discover from people in recovery? 

Everyday...It also amazes me how long I lived thinking I was in this mess alone. Awesome share...Thank you.



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mikef


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Thanx for sharing,blessings of this day and absolutely.................My thoughts on being unique are long in the past. smileHave a blessed and productive day brothersmile



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Pythonpappy


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I'm going to say it's creepy ... I used to come to meetings and meet someone for the first time and within a few minutes I knew that they knew everything about ME ... I have found that we can be worlds apart and 'still' know each other intimately ... it's like they even know what I'm thinking ... alcoholics are like that ... I used to think I still had some things hidden away in the closet of my past, but no, the alcoholic knows all too well exactly what my past holds ... like I said, it's creepy ...

And those of us who are in recovery know even more about each other ... that's why when I travel and visit other groups, it's like 'instant family' ... like home away from home ...


Thanks for the post Pablo, take care and God Bless,
Pappy



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justadrunk


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Love the post. Amazed? Absolutely - every day.

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Rob84


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Hi Paul,

Thanks for sharing the story. The amazing thing is that the two brothers cared for their father and rid themselves of any resentment toward him.

I didn't grow up in a alcoholic home, but my brother is also a alcoholic. His journey in recovery started just about 6 years ago.



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Rob

"There ain't no Coupe DeVille hiding in the bottom of a Cracker Jack Box."
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