I Need to Find A Sponsor....Any Advice?

betterthanyesterday52 · MIP Old Timer

I Need to Find A Sponsor....Any Advice?

Bob K · Senior Member

I always tell people that you don't look for a sponsor you listen for one. Listen to people talk in meetings and find someone you relate to and speaks of the kind of values you would like to have in your life.

mikef · MIP Old Timer

Yes I agree with Bob,,,I spent much time listening for my 2nd sponsor and our relationship has been a blessing ever since..There are many ideas about getting a sponsor but listening for one,worked best for me...:)

Senior Member

Ask God for help! He will send you the people in your life that bolster your program, whether they are sponsors or not.

Bob's advice is spot-on: LISTEN for a sponsor. Do they talk about working the steps, and how the steps have transformed their lives? Do they go to Big Book and Step meetings? Do they perform any service for the fellowship?

The key is patience, but as alcoholics it's easy for us to turn patience into sloth, and pat ourselves on the back for our virtue. It's a fine line.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Try This:

http://www.aa.org/pdf/products/p-15_Q&AonSpon.pdf

Jerry F · MIP Old Timer

"I never had one before when I was in AA..." I believe the reason for one and the urgency is in that statement. Only one of the things I was told in early sobriety was that I shouldn't attempt sobriety with the same head I drank with...that made a ton of sense to me and that is why what Bob said, for me, is golden. Listen to the ones that bring you peace and understanding and the desire to be sober entirely. Keep coming back here and posting (((hugs))) smile You are also right with..Women on Women and Men on Men.

RubyTues · MIP Old Timer

In my experience, a sponsor is put in your path. I agonized for ages about asking someone to be my sponsor and kept trying to think of different people then my sponsor was right in my path on a number of occasions and boom, I realized that was for a reason. She is a wonderful sponsor.

I also think it doesn't hurt to let it be known in your sharing or informal conversations that you are looking for a sponsor. Sometimes someone will suggest a person to approach.

Good luck!

betterthanyesterday52 · MIP Old Timer

RubyTues- Actually I did mention to someone a few nights ago I was looking for one and introduced someone to me at tonight's meeting. We exchanged numbers to set up a coffee meeting. I haven't heard or seen her much at the meetings I go to, though. I will add that to my things to pray about tonight b/4 bedtime, as someone suggested. Thanks for the site name Pythonpappy and thanks to all you guys and gals and your great suggestions!

RubyTues · MIP Old Timer

Awesome, betterthanyesterday, glad to hear it! I had coffee dates with a couple of AA-ers before I found my sponsor too. It's always good to build a wide program network.

Mr_David · MIP Old Timer

Pythonpappy wrote:
Try This:

http://www.aa.org/pdf/products/p-15_Q&AonSpon.pdf

Great pamphlet, Roger. I also agree with Bob: Listen to what others have to say, first. It may just be a determining factor in your decision making after all. Then, there's the involvement aspect. You know: How people 'act'. I think it's crucial also, if not more. Not only is it a very admirable quality, but an important aspect to any great recovery program, at least it has for me. Just remember one thing: People who 'work' the program are the ones who usually have what others want...peace of mind. It's what attracted me to my current sponsor, Matt. A man of integrity, indeed. I hope this helps.

-- Edited by Mr_David on Saturday 22nd of June 2013 11:13:28 PM