The twelve steps how important are they in recovery?
I ask this question in the sure knowledge that in my personal opinion they are paramount.
I have left A.A in the past having failed in my sustained recovery and I'm convinced that had I been following the suggested path that the steps lead one on I would not have taken the first drink .
Now I am not professing to have all the answers or trying to be the font of all knowledge but for this alcoholic who has returned to A.A having laid the steps aside and picked up ,the only way I can see to be comfortable in my sobriety is to follow the suggested program and try, to the best of my ability, to combine the steps along with regular attendance at meetings as the path to the serenity which we all pray for at the end of every meeting
Am I being overly simplistic and over bearing in my stance .
I only bring this up because I shared my feelings on the matter at a recent meeting and felt that afterwards I was given the cold shoulder by some members .
I really don't wish to offend any one in the group and always state during a share that it is my personal take on A.A and how I feel that it would work for me.
That cold shoulder feeling was my perception being self centered and selfish when I came in - thinking it was all about me - and that all the others should act perfectly and run to me and hug me and shake my hand and gush over me and every word I said and everything that was going on in my life. Finally - when that kept not happening, I had hung around and stuck it out long enough to try and take action with getting to know people myself... instead of waiting for them to approach me. I also read about 'how to be approachable'. I realized I was also giving off unapproachable vibes - and I also wasn't putting in the effort. Not saying that this is you - that was just my experience, and how I remember it - but that could be wrong too.
Anyhow - welcome to the board - glad you're here and please do keep coming back : ) Your post was pretty spot on for me - I need to do the steps, a mini run through with all my problems and blessings - and continue to attend meetings regularly - how else will I GET TO practice 12th step work? So yes - good thoughts in my opinion. Thanks!
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
Welcome to the MIP board, hope you keep coming back.
I wouldn't worry about anyones reaction after the meeting, chances are you are reading too much into it. Like our book states, many of us can be overly sensitive about things. I know that was the case with myself.
To be happy and content in sobriety I need to continue to practicing these principles (steps) in all my affairs. The key is adopting them as a design for living and putting them into action.
I do think there is a cognative/behavioral therapy and group support element also to AA. I think early on in recovery these things combined with adopting some basic spiritual practices helped me stay sober long enough to get a working knowledge of the 12 steps and grateful recovery.
Like Tasha mentioned, I need to be at meetings continuing to do 12th and 3d step-God's work.
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Rob
"There ain't no Coupe DeVille hiding in the bottom of a Cracker Jack Box."
The twelve steps how important are they in recovery?
I ask this question in the sure knowledge that in my personal opinion they are paramount.
I have left A.A in the past having failed in my sustained recovery and I'm convinced that had I been following the suggested path that the steps lead one on I would not have taken the first drink .
Now I am not professing to have all the answers or trying to be the font of all knowledge but for this alcoholic who has returned to A.A having laid the steps aside and picked up ,the only way I can see to be comfortable in my sobriety is to follow the suggested program and try, to the best of my ability, to combine the steps along with regular attendance at meetings as the path to the serenity which we all pray for at the end of every meeting
Am I being overly simplistic and over bearing in my stance .
I only bring this up because I shared my feelings on the matter at a recent meeting and felt that afterwards I was given the cold shoulder by some members .
I really don't wish to offend any one in the group and always state during a share that it is my personal take on A.A and how I feel that it would work for me.
Hi Insanicdrunk, ... ... ...
You will find what others think of you and your program here in AA is none of your business ... trying to figure out what or how others think is a big waste of time ... time better spent on building your relationship with God, a God of your understanding ... ... ...
How important are the 12 steps ??? ... they are NOT a 'once and done' deal ... they are a 'way of life' that ensure our continued recovery at the very least ... they help us mature in the love of helping others ... once the 12 step process has been completed properly, then transform ourselves into helpful human beings ... we learn selflessness and how it affects the way we see life itself ... alcohol disappears from our life and we take on a positive attitude ...
If we remove the practice of the 12 steps, as you said, we are likely to return to our 'old ways' ... our 'old way' of thinking is what we strive to stay away from ... and we cannot do that without the 12 steps in our lives daily ...
Love ya and God Bless,
Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Welcome Alan! Nice to have you here with us. What other's think of you is none of your business. What other's say and do is more about them and their reality than it is about you.
AA is a 12 Step Program. A program of continuous action. For me, I have a daily reprieve from Alcoholism based on the maintenance of my Spiritual condition. To maintain that Spiritual condition I need to practice the 12 Steps(Principles) in all my affairs. I needed to change. In order to change, I need to do the work. Without change, more of the same. I did plenty of research on this.
I've tried The Program piece meal in the past and the results were not good. Old think, attitude and outlook came back quickly.
The twelve steps how important are they in recovery?
In AA Recovery?....For myself they are the program that keeps me alive....And able to enjoy a life without alcohol....Something I didn't think was possible. Those promises come at the end of step nine...Beginning of step ten...for a reason....That's what I needed. I needed to let God do for me what I couldn't do for myself...Or die trying on my own.
Step Nine Promises
If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us - sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.
pg 83-84 BB
Step Ten Promises
And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone - even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality - safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.
pg 84-85 BB
I've posted this before...But it's one of the best descriptions of the steps I've seen...Written by one of the original 100 members of AA that started the first group in Cleveland...He called that group....Alcoholics Anonymous...After the book. Enjoy!
I've Never Quit Being Active by Clarence Snyder A.A. Grapevine, November 1999
On February 11, 1938, I had my last drink. I was a chronic alky, and through a long, involved miracle, I met my sponsor, Dr. Bob, one of our co-founders. He put me in Akron City Hospital, where I met the alkies who had preceded me in the Fellowship.
Fifteen months later, I organized the Cleveland, Ohio AA group. The activity in the Cleveland area was hectic. I spent practically all my time obtaining and following up on publicity for AA, lining up cooperation with civic and church groups, hospitals, and courts, and helping new groups to start.
So what do I do now, thirty years later? I have never quit being active, although my position in the Fellowship has modified over the years. I attend an average of two meetings per week, when I am home. I am also asked to speak at various groups. In addition, I am invited to take part in numerous group anniversary programs and AA roundups around the country (and sometimes out of the country). Many people call upon me for counsel and advice on both personal and group problems. I have an extensive correspondence, since I have made so many friends in AA from coast to coast. Once in a while, I sponsor someone. Cases where about everything has been tried, by everyone else, often wind up in my hands.
I have not found the program to be difficult, and I maintain that if it does seem difficult for anyone, he is not doing it "right." Certainly, when I came to this Fellowship, I was in no position or condition to handle anything difficult! I kept things simple. But I must add that when I first began I was well sponsored.
I took measures now summarized in the first nine Steps of the program: admittance of need (the First Step), surrender (Second through Seventh), and restitution (Eighth and Ninth). Having done this, I no longer had a drinking problem, since it had been turned over to a Higher Power. Now I had - and still have - a living problem. But that is taken care of by the practice of Steps Ten, Eleven, and Twelve. So I don't have to be concerned about anything but a simple three-step program, which with practice has become habitual.
Step Ten enables me to check on myself and my activities of the day. I have found that most things disturbing me are little things, but still the very things which, if not dealt with, can pile up and eventually overwhelm me. My daily checkup covers good deeds as well as questionable ones; often, I find I can commend myself in some areas, while in others I owe apologies.
Step Eleven is done after my daily inventory. I usually need the peace resulting from prayer and meditation, and I do receive guidance for my life and actions.
Step Twelve, to me, does involve not only carrying the message, but extending AA principles into all phases of my daily life.
I learned long ago that this is a life-changing program, but that, after the change occurs, it is necessary for me to go on making the effort to improve myself mentally, morally, and spiritually.
This is my simple program, and I recommend it to anyone who wants a good life and is willing to do his share of helping.
C.H.S., St. Petersburg, Florida
If I could give you any advice as far as the steps are concerned....Find someone that is living them...And ask them to take you through them as laid out in the book....It's life changing.
Excellent post Stepchild ... ... ... reminds me of ... :
But the actual or potential alcoholic, with hardly any exception, will be absolutely unable to stop drinking on the basis of self-knowledge. This is a point we wish to emphasize and re-emphasize, to smash home upon our alcoholic readers as it has been revealed to us out of bitter experience. ... pg. 39 BB
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
You know what I like about that story Mike B. ?....The way he simplifies the program....God knows this alcoholic tried to complicate those steps when I started....Overthink things much?????....Uhhh Yeah!...I still study that book....And the more I study that book and practice what's in it to the best of my ability...The more I'm seeing....It's really pretty simple. I only have to get one step completely 100% right....And that's the first one. Amazing stuff. I thank God everyday they put what they found down on paper.....What a gift.
Absolutely, me too! Simple Program for complicated people.... I still can complicate it at times, but I remind myself to keep it simple. It's improving over time. Thank you God! No need to reinvent anything here, it's worked just fine the way it is for 78 years. I heard a speaker the other night answer the question of how to work The Program; her reply- " I'm going to take you through The Steps as they are laid out in the BB". " No need to blaze new trails up the mountain, we'll use the well worn one. " I like that........
