Today I swung my front door wide open and placed my Stevens 12 gauge shotgun
right in the doorway.
I gave it 6 shells, and noticing that it had no legs, even placed it in my... wheelchair
to help it get around.
I then left it alone and went about my business.
While I was gone, the mailman delivered my mail, the neighbor boy across
the street mowed the yard, a girl walked her dog down the street, and quite
a few cars stopped at the stop sign right in front of our house. After about an
hour, I checked on the gun. It was still sitting there in the wheelchair, right where
I had left it. It hadn't rolled itself outside. It certainly hadn't killed anyone, even
with the numerous opportunities it had been presented to do so. In fact, it
hadn't even loaded itself.
Well, you can imagine my surprise, with all the media hype about how
dangerous guns are and how they kill people. Either the media is wrong,
and it's the misuse of guns by PEOPLE that kill people, or I'm in possession
of the laziest gun in the world.
All right, well I'm off to check on my spoons. I hear they're making people fat.
'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Nice! Thanks Pappy!
BTW..My real name is Dori
