Amazing coincidence. I just put down what I hope will be my last cigarette.
Some thoughts I have are:
I have You, God. I can overcome anything. Help me love myself. Help me stop treating myself this way. I know I can do better than this. The people who slander me really have no control over my insides. My sick parents think ill never get out from under but I will - I have You, God. I known the people who have harmed me are sick. Help me Love them (from afar for today).
Replacing cigarettes with food and coffee won't work either. It's time for me to own the woman I am and have some COURAGE.
We only live once. Make it a good one.
-- Edited by odat on Saturday 11th of May 2013 04:32:26 PM
I had a couple of cigarettes with a friend yesterday and I haven't smoked in six years! I'm feeling alcoholic shame and guilt. So weird and not a good feeling. I didn't even really enjoy the smokes so I won't be repeating it but I don't like this feeling.
yes, the alcoholic "thinking" is there and active at times in my life, too. if i feel stress, i may go online and buy stuff, trying to relieve my uncomfortable feelings, but not really think it through very clearly, it is an automatic reaction, just like drinking was when i was active in my addiction. sometimes instead of online buying, i will start craving pastries or snack chips, trying to physically take care of an emotional problem that i may be avoiding. eating and spending money, the flip side of my alcoholic behavior when i am not working my program. thanks for posting, it helps to know we are in this together. it should be very obvious to me when i do that, but a lot of times it catches me by surprise. after spending money and eating fattening foods i often feel sick, empty and guilty, and the problem is still there waiting to be acknowledged and worked on. i have tried to do God's job and when i fail, He is there to guide me back to where i can be of service to others instead of stuck in my own head.
Day three without a cigarette here thanks to God and the Serenity Prayer. :)
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I think there's an invisible principle of living...if we believe we're guided through every step of our lives, we are. Its a lovely sight, watching it work.
Hey RT, The beauty of it is you recognized it, summed it up, and learned from it. How did that happen? The sanity of the program. Remember when we did not have that? How did we survive? Tom
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"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
Hey RT, The beauty of it is you recognized it, summed it up, and learned from it. How did that happen? The sanity of the program. Remember when we did not have that? How did we survive? Tom
Love this. So true. Progress, not perfection!
All my best wishes for kicking the habit, Odat and Vixen!
