For many years now I haven't felt the need to burden meetings with my personal problems. It has seemed to me that AA is not equipped, nor intended, to advise me on the many issues that life seems to throw up. For example, I just had a problem with my life insurance which I am sure the group could not have helped with. It just took a little direct action from me and it's solved. It never entered my head that this issue was worthy of the group's attention when people present have a serious life threatening illness to conntend with.
I felt the same as my wife went through her illness. My AA close friends knew what was going on, but it was not something for the group to tackle. Later, of course, I share my experience in dealing with "the certain trials and low spots" to bear witness to how the program and God have made it possible for me to get through these things more or less sanely and normally.
I know some members of my old group are shocked at this because they believe all problems should be shared in meetings, but for me it seems a problem shared (with the wrong motive) can be doubled rather than halved. And I have another problem with this, which crops up everytime I go to a meeting feeling a bit out of sorts - God.
Yesterday we had a wild sail across Cook Strait, and the admiral was giving me the silent treatment when we got back. Yuk, I just hate it when that happens. So I wonder off to the detox meeting trying to wotk out what I have done and what needs fixing. Maybe I'll share that I'm feeling a bit off at the meeting.
My practice, on the way to a meeting, is to offer up a little prayer asking God to help me say something that might help someone. The result is my petty problems don't even come to mind and, if I am asked to share, and I find myself focussing on whatever aspect of the program seems to be important to the other members, especially the new ones. I seem to leave the meeting feeling uplifted, and my little problem seems to be placed in perspective and usually gives me no further cause for concern.
Has God decided that I will be happier focussing on the needs of others rather than self, or have I just got into a bad habit?
I love your habit, it mimics mine ... ... ... and Yes, I think God wants us to focus on others rather than ourselves ... (when we have learned how, by staying sober that is)
Like you said, when I do that, it gets me out of me ... it helps me to stay off my 'pity pot' ... and it also makes me expand my 'gratitude' list ...
Bad habit??? ... ... ... a bad habit would be to leave God out of the picture, in my opinion ...
Love ya and God Bless, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Well, considering you've been sober just shy of a year or so the length of my life - I don't really feel equipped to offer anything other than thank you so much for sharing about it. The distractions I use to keep the focus off me have led me to a little codependent work and some melody beatie books. I got a minute or 2 of balance back in January I think...
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
