It takes practice Tasha, ... ... ... just as you, yourself, practice the piano in order to master the skill needed to produce beautiful, moving, music ... we must try to learn these skills too, in order to not get burned ourselves ... when resentments pop up, and they will, we learn that to hold onto to them or to even use them to seek revenge, it always turns out we do more damage to ourselves than we will ever do to the individual at issue here ... ... ...

Sometimes I see people staying sober purely on a resentment ... their anger so great as to prove to someone else they can do it ... this is not the type sobriety I want ... I want the kind where peace and serenity actually have deep meaning ... a calming effect rather than sitting around in turmoil over some silly control issue or resentment issue ... It took some time for me, but I can truly say today, I do not 'rent' space in my head for thoughts that are negative that involve someone else and their problems ... it only becomes my problem if I invite it into my thinking ...

It's just like what I've heard around the rooms of AA, 'holding as resentment against a person is like me holding a red hot coal in my hand, getting ready to throw it at that person ... I'm the only one getting burned' ... ... ... and that has truly been my experience in every sense of the word ...

SO, ... ... ... it's NOT so hard if we practice ... practice these principles in all our affairs ...


Love ya and God Bless,
Pappy

justadrunk wrote:

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I have one big resentment and that one seems to be staying put. Better than resenting everyone and everything like before I guess : )

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 Oh my, ... ... ... yes, I guess you're right, but ... ... ... as it says above:

Most of us have been at the receiving end of an injustice at some time in our lives. Most of us know someone who's complained of an injustice we've done to him or her. Life can be a breeding ground for resentments, if we let it.

"Yes, but this time I really was wronged," we complain.

Maybe you were. But harboring resentment isn't the solution. If it were, our resentment list would resemble the Los Angeles telephone directory. Deal with your feelings. Learn whatever lesson is at hand. Then let the feelings go.

I just wish you success in putting that one to bed ... sooner the better in my book ... if this is still about 'inlaws', then just consider they are in another world, apart from yours ... you can keep your part of the world clean without having to be influenced by theirs ... and you well know that what they think about you is none of your business, so go your own path toward serenity and give any of that negative stuff up ... God is better at handling stuff like that than we are ... let Him/Her deal with it ...