((((Col)))) been there...done that and remember those growing up lessons which were crazy and then humorous.   Go "thru" them and you'll come out the other side in gratitudes because you are awake and aware and clear about what is going on.  Its for me a relapse of sorts...not the chemical kind for sure but the chemicaled training for sure.   When I was drinking my habits...mind, body, spirit and emotions became "usual" daily behaviors for me...drink in hand or not and so I practiced that stuff and not much of anything else...I lost sanity and sobriety and so coming out of it was retraining...program retraining.   I sold or gave away the spot light I tried to stay in the glow of  when at the same time I felt compulsed to act as if no one else was on the stage I occupied.   Retrain...practice, practice, practice...learn new ways of thinking and seeing and listening and talking...do what others do that are different and more successful than what I did.  Recovery.   No it's not all about you or me for that matter.  We don't have to be right...we can choose happy instead.  There is lots of literature out there...lots...from Mother Teresa to Bill W to Og Mandino and more...take your time...be patient and turn down the bright lights and sit in the shade for awhile.   Great post ((((hugs)))) 

Nice post Col!  Oh yes!  That bad neighborhood between my ears.  I was told never to go there alone.     But, I still do... because I'm an Alcoholic with a diesase that centers in my mind and effects the way I think and act.  Without help, it's too much for me.  That's why I'm here.  If I wonder too far from God or The Program, I start to believe the lies my head tells me.     Then, I'm heading back toward a drink instead of away from one.  Thanks for posting, this is what it's all about.