This is a phrase I hear often in the rooms- and it's true. I used to hear this being said, look around me nodding my head, and think "isn't that the truth!!" while looking down my nose at others. It took me a while to realize I should be looking at myself when these words are said. I didn't realize that I was playing the comparison game. I realized that I thought myself a great and spiritual person by identifying with every speaker. Like I was doing them a favor. On one hand, I could identify with every speaker, on the other hand I still thought myself different. Strange- the still foggy mess of my head. I'm a snob - always have been. It just occurred to me. I never thought that I was, but there it is. So many new things I'm discovering about myself! The great thing is I now have the tools to work character defects. LOL- the fact that I can now admit that I have them is a HUGE growth from where this sick puppy was 10 months ago:)
I use to go to a meeting in Houston, Tx that had a sign just outside the door that said, "Some of the worlds sickest people enter through these doors". Inside, just on the other side of the door was another sign that said..."And no one here thinks the sign outside applies to them".
I am here to tell you that there are some of us out here that are sicker than others ... But I learned that I shouldn't hold that against the new comer ... LOL ... I still sometimes sit back and hear stories that make me think, aaaw, that ain't nothin' compared to the insanity that I went through ... I learned that we are all equally sick and that we all equally need to help each other ...
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Yes, I've heard the "some are sicker than others" term used since my beginnings in AA, and I know I have used it also. I never really thought much about it until now.
I think it might be most often said when some of our members still exhibit some alcoholic characteristics even though they are no longer drinking. I always kind of took it as a reminder that "love and tolerance toward others is our code".
I think I just try to focus on the miracles as they occur, understandably some have a longer tougher road than others, but everyone can recover if they have the ability to be honest with themselves.
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Rob
"There ain't no Coupe DeVille hiding in the bottom of a Cracker Jack Box."
I found this old thread while searching online. I must admit I have used the "some are sicker than others" to excuse myself for my own behavior at times (like when I relapsed and said "well, guess I am one of those 'sicker than others' that just doesn't 'get it'". I also have found that it has popped into my mind sometimes about others' behavior. This post is a good reminder to me. I guess I have heard it so much in shares and read it it "stuck". I love what Pappy said above about all of us are equally sick.
.......leaving the rest ('cept what I need to keep me sober) and I am still one sober and grateful recovering alcoholic.
-- Edited by leavetherest on Saturday 20th of August 2016 09:30:25 AM
I found this old thread while searching online. I must admit I have used the "some are sicker than others" to excuse myself for my own behavior at times (like when I relapsed and said "well, guess I am one of those 'sicker than others' that just doesn't 'get it'". I also have found that it has popped into my mind sometimes about others' behavior. This post is a good reminder to me. I guess I have heard it so much in shares and read it it "stuck". I love what Pappy said above about all of us are equally sick.
.......leaving the rest ('cept what I need to keep me sober) and I am still one sober and grateful recovering alcoholic.
-- Edited by leavetherest on Saturday 20th of August 2016 09:30:25 AM
Good to see you availing yourself of the rich database of postings we have on the forum here. Much experience, strength and hope is available to all of us with but a click of the search button. That's part of what this forum is for.
It wasn't but a few months ago that you were calling out members here for digging up old threads to learn from and comment on. Now you are digging them up yourself. That's progress, I think. Keep it up, LTR.
Hey Pickle, forgot who commented on your updated avatar, but I agree, I like it too ... I don't know???, it just seems to have uh, 'class' ... ... ... LOL ...
Oh, LTR, our archives here DO have a treasure trove of great experience in get'n and stay'n sober ... good job of do'n some research ...
-- Edited by Pythonpappy on Saturday 20th of August 2016 08:20:21 PM
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
The archives here are like having access to a world of wise and practiced recovering alcoholics. Just like in the rooms, I realize that I rarely have an original experience in recovery, someone else has had almost the exact same thing happen to them and I can benefit from reading about how they got through it, or in some cases, didn't get through it and I can learn from that as well. I guess I'm not so unique after all...
I cannot remember calling others out on something so silly. Probably was downing a bottle of wine if so. Sounds like something a drunk would do. Actually I came across the above when I was googling. I don't know how to search for old posts on here and really have no desire to go and search for specific individual's posts. I am much too busy for that kind of thing.
I cannot remember calling others out on something so silly. Probably was downing a bottle of wine if so. Sounds like something a drunk would do.
You definitely did it. More than once. No good reason. As for the wine drinking, you would know best. If so, wouldn't be a rational excuse.
leavetherest wrote:
Actually I came across the above when I was googling. I don't know how to search for old posts on here and really have no desire to go and search for specific individual's posts. I am much too busy for that kind of thing.
Right. Actually, Google is a good search tool for our forum. The forum's search tool is clunky but very easy to learn, as you have found out.
I hope the alcohol doesn't end up taking me out. Besides, if I want to kill myself it is easier to climb to your ego and jump to your IQ.
Now please, as I told Marc, leave my inventory to me and I'll leave yours to you, otherwise, since the only thing you seem to understand is insults, put downs and inventory taking and choosing me to get out some obviously deeply buried hostilities, I will stoop down to your level for now and while I am still new in recovery. That'smy excuse--what is yours????
Oh, and wipe your chin, little boy.
-- Edited by leavetherest on Tuesday 23rd of August 2016 03:48:12 AM
but I think Pickle was simply make'n an 'observation' here, not take'n an inventory ... ... ... in my humble opinion, this is noth'n more than adding fuel to the fire ... but that's just me ... controversy is something I 'try' to avoid now-a-days ... it doesn't help me spiritually, you know??? ... ... ...
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Really? You're defending Tanin? Maybe he wasn't taking my inventory in this one....maybe it was just stirring that pot.....and maybe I must have imagined all the past postings where he was taking my inventory and picking apart my words and I had to fend for myself.
Sure wish someone would defend me for a change.
It is easy to avoid controversy when it is someone else being picked on. This board has been used as an instrument to do just that--what is this--the military??? Where people come here (who are already broken enough) only to be torn down to nothing (when they already feel like nothing). I have noticed over and over where people including me get ripped apart by him and Marc. And I have noticed, in the past, as well as right now, when I finally break and try and fight that "fire" with fire, and stand up for myself, my post (not the other person's) gets deleted and/or I get reprimanded. Of course, deleting has not happened in a while with all of Tanin's "no censorship". Even posts which are extremely inappropriate and should be deleted remain here.
Anyway....is everyone scared of him and Marc? Both have a fairly lengthy history of chasing away others with loads of great ES&H, who are seriously wanting to help newcomers and others who are suffering from alcoholism. (And I know, I know...I have managed to chase away a couple myself, who insulted me and couldn't handle me standing up for myself. I got a PM questioning why I said "your honor" to one of those people in a post--no mention whatsoever of him telling me I had my head up my ass because I didn't want to go to meetings and was selfish because I didn't want to "give back". So I owned that "I'm the bad guy here"....felt guilty and was willing to make an amends on my part if the guy came back.
This board is losing good folks who really have a strong desire to help one another, and letting those two egomaniacs take over. It is losing newcomers who come here and look for help instead of being harassed. What a real damn shame!
Bus driver! Bus Driver! Let me off! I didn't realize I was on the route to crazy!
Sure I'll be referred to as the "Drama Queen" having her "pity party".....won't be the first time. Maybe someone with a lick of sense will get some of what I said above....I don't really care anymore.
...and I just realized how appropriate the title of this posting is, because all of this is making me sicker....(as if I wasn't sick enough).
.....I have been praying about all this and after doing so, I have decided that it is best that I refrain from posting on this board so that not only do I not set myself up again, it is so I don't fall back into thinking it is okay to act out and have the same behavior which disturbs me. I have a lot of work to do on myself and there is not much help I can give to others as long as I allow myself to be get worked up like I did earlier.
I will continue to come on here to read the postings by some of the folks which really helped me and I really and truly appreciate those people so much.
-- Edited by leavetherest on Tuesday 23rd of August 2016 10:59:20 AM
One of my old ideas is that I know what's best for me. The part about some of us have tried to hold on ... is about me. I am that some even well into sobriety. I brush these teeth, I know what it takes to put this body to sleep, I wake up and carry it, what on earth could you tell me about what's best for me? Are you nuts?
*insert and snip my hideous life before aa found me*
Direction, faith, and a piece of mind are just a few of the attributes that I have gained by having the willingness to say and look at my life when it was ran by me, that I have no frickin idea what's best for me because now, I wouldn't trade these attributes in for anything.
My name is Pattie and I'm an Alcoholic, Welcome to all of the newcomers and thank you for the ESH shared through these wires. I have found in and out of the rooms that there are many sick people in this world, in all forms so I must apply the principles of the program and put the serenity prayer into action.
Page 67 in The Big Book always helps put me in my place when I am dealing with trying to understand this dilemma -
Though we did not like their symptoms and the way these disturbed us, they, like ourselves, were sick too. We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend. When a person offended we said to ourselves, "This is a sick man. How can I be helpful to him? God save me from being angry. Thy will be done."
We avoid retaliation or argument. We wouldn't treat sick people that way. If we do, we destroy our chance of being helpful. We cannot be helpful to all people, but at least God will show us how to take a kindly and tolerant view of each and every one.
Now does this mean that I will let a monster into my world...no, this would be the part that I can change...I would not allow it, but I'm sure not going to poke a stick at it. As a sober alcoholic I have the choice today to not allow these monsters into my world...or my mind, this was not the case when I was drinking. As for my own sickness, this is a concrete program that I can apply to my life on a daily basis to keep my side of the street clean so that I may walk in the sunlight of the spirit.
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We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed
I came to this old thread because Marc placed a link in a posting of his.
There are 2 comments regarding this thread that I would like to make:
The first is for leavetherest, this is in fact a very benign forum, which is another way to say that the participants demonstrate a great deal of sobriety. Check out some others.
Second, I had a minister point out that a church isn't filled with Christians per se, but sick people (of varying degrees) trying to get better. The same could be said of AA. I know, I am saying the same thing, but it puts a positive slant on things. I try to remember to be grateful and thus to find the positive things (while ignoring the negative ones whenever possible).
I also wanted to share my experience this afternoon. I was walking a friend a few blocks to her home after a very hot meeting, 92 degrees outside and no AC on the second floor of this church. Maybe they were showing us what hell might be like? I think we alcoholics already know what hell is like, but it would be egotistical to say that they did this just for us! Anyway, we stopped at street corner across the street from where she lives to wait for a traffic light and someone I knew from the 2 local Alano Clubs suddenly appears with his dog and we had an AA meeting on a hot muggy street corner. I have always said that you only need 2 or more alcoholics who get to together to stay sober to constitute a meeting, coffee, heat, snacks, a roof over your head, and literature are (a bonus, but) not required. I will now add AC to that list.
The idea is based on the long form of the Third Tradition: "Any two or three alcoholics gathered together for sobriety may call themselves an A.A. group, provided that, as a group, they have no other affiliation."
-- Edited by SoberInMI on Saturday 17th of June 2017 09:34:32 PM
