When an alcoholic stops drinking, its cause for rejoicing.
Unfortunately, sobriety is not guaranteed to last. It takes hard work and commitment and a keen eye for dangers.
One danger to the non-drinking alcoholic is the dry drunk, a set of habits and attitudes that take the joy out of life for the alcoholic and those around him or her. Those habits often precede a relapse into drinking, even if the alcoholic has been sober for years.
A dry drunk can be successfully treated. Here are some signs that will help you recognize the condition, and some suggestions on how to cope with it.
Warning Signs
During their drinking years, alcoholics develop many abnormal attitudes and behaviors, which come with them into sobriety, and are characteristic of the dry drunk. Often, family members dont recognize the symptoms of a dry drunk as anything unusual, since they have become so used to the abnormal behavior of the alcoholic.
Some typical signs of a dry drunk are:
* acting self-important, either by having all the answers, or playing poor me.
* making harsh judgments of oneself and others.
* being impatient or pursuing whims.
* blaming others for shortcomings one suspects in oneself.
* being dishonest, usually beginning with little things.
* impulsive behavior which ignores whats best for oneself and others.
* inability to make decisions.
* mood swings, trouble with expressing emotions, feeling unsatisfied.
* detachment, self-absorption, boredom, distraction or disorganization.
* nostalgia for the drinking life.
* fantasizing, daydreaming and wishful thinking or euphoria.
* less participation in a 12-step program or dropping out altogether.
Solution
Talk to your sponsor, go to meetings, meditation, seek out therapy, and dont drink.
This syndrome is unfortunately very commom, and highlights the untreated emotional issues underneath the addictive disorder
Thank you for this post. Unfortunately I have had, and currently do have dealings with somebody in my life who fits this to a T. I'm too new to sobriety to really do much, as this gentleman has been in and around AA for years with no sponser and refusing to do the steps. I include him in my prayers. It sounds terrible to say, but I kind of use his experience and behavior as motivation for my own path in sobriety- an example of what not to do, if you will. It's difficult to deal with, however. All I can do is pray for him.
The "dry drunk" is a miserable state for the non-drinking alcoholic to be in. There is no serenity, no peace, no "recovery". Just a dangerous slippery slope that more often than not eventually ends up with a return to drinking. The dry drunk is not "just" a result of not "working the program" sufficiently--it has a number of biophysical underpinnings that are "invisible". So people can be showing symptoms of the dry drunk in spite of being fully engaged in the A.A. program of recovery. Conscious efforts at relapse prevention, by working the program/the steps, and also by using some of the tools like via some of Hazelden's books or my favorite, Terrence Gorski's Staying Sober: A Guide to Relapse Prevention (and seeing a good doctor who knows alcoholism) can be life-saving. The prolonged dry drunk state is why spouses end up saying "I like you better when you were drinking." And ain't that just awful!
I was actually having a conversation about that with someone the other day. I gather there is some debate on the issue. The Big Book uses the word 'recovered' a lot.
I think that's recovered from the malady, not the disease ??? ... may discuss it at length tomorrow, LOL
There are plenty of threads (use the search function) on "recovered vs. recovering", please don't start another one. Those of your that are "recovered" good for you, please don't try and convert the rest of us.
-- Edited by StPeteDean on Thursday 7th of March 2013 07:26:43 AM
