I have had a real awful go of the PMS stuff over the past year.
This will be my 10th go at it in sobriety. Every month for this week, I am restless, irritable and discontented TO SAY THE LEAST, and I attribute it to something lacking in my program, or something lacking in THE program all together. I start thinking no one likes me. It's the only time I raise my voice and can't handle the pressures of parenting. It's the time when I have to tell myself over and over to quit thinking like a psycho - no my husband does not go to alanon to meet woman! I have to force myself to use EVERY single tool I have aquired to stop the obsessive thoughts... the mood swings... the sleepless nights... all the ups and downs that month after month I blame on EVERYTHING else pertaining to AA - until that magical day when I get my period and I'm like "Ooooh!". Now it makes sense. Okay, so everything is fine, I've just been PMSing. Hrmf.
So that was all fine and dandy for the first 6 months or so. I was still getting used to having to actually deal with PMS instead of it just blending into the horror of being a drunk who's all over the place anyway - and couldn't possibly tell the difference between every day life and PMS.
After about 6 or so episodes, I realized that I do in fact have more than mild pms, and I should do something about it. I did some research, opting to try natural remedies before going to see a doctor.
I tried different PMS teas and better vitamins, and didn't find any relief. I added walks... still nothing.
Last month I added the vitamin 'Joy' to my power multi with high vit. d & b's - omega - and probiotic mix that I've been doing for years. Mostly for SAD - seasonal affective disorder which I experience in the fall and winter.
So this past week, was my PMS week, and I forgot all about it AGAIN. Today when I woke up and was like "OOOOooooh, that explains a lot" I also lept for JOY! I literally did! I rushed up to tell my poor husband who also suffers from my PMS that I MADE IT! I made it the whole week with only one melt down, and it really wasn't even that bad! I recognized it - the tools WORKED from the program, and I came through it pretty easily!
It was certainly still there, but it was not so bad that I would think I would need a doctor. I'm so happy! I'm over - JOYED!
I gave my husband 100 kisses and said "Can you believe it? That really wasn't that bad! I can live with this! It's getting better! I barely suffered at all!!!!!!" To which he said: "oh... I'm glad YOU didn't suffer much". LOL
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
I have similar experiences. I always forget there are a ton of biological reasons for why I might be feeling crappy, emotional, or whatever for a given day. I repeatedly get convinced "something" is wrong and start frantically thinking what needs to change in my environment to make me feel better.
I think this is just the alcoholic in me. For whatever reason, I believe we alcoholics are just prone to be uncomfortable in our skin this way. This is why we are on a never ending spiritual quest for serenity. I have always had this thing where I could be just going along and then it will hit me...."I don't feel right." My answer to that used to be to drink. Now.... Invariably, I wind up chalking it up to one of several possibilities such as "Oh yeah...I might be having an off moment cuz I have had a mood disorder (albeit well treated)" or "I might be feeling anxious cuz I just drank 4 cups of coffee" or "Maybe I feel tired cuz I am getting over a bad ass cold", or "I just worked 10 hours straight and didn't eat lunch." Common sense eluded me for YEARS about these things cuz as soon as I got any uneasy feelings, I drank them away.
Whatever problems I have today are nothing compared to the giant one which was my active alcoholism. That is what stopped me from ever even recognizing sensible answers to why I might be feeling like I was and what the solution to those problems might be.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
Soooo agree Pinkchip. I'm still getting used to the idea that not everybody has these reactions. While uncomfortable, it's become so normal. My instinct is to do anything just to make it go away no matter how destructive.
Yes! I can definetly relate. Considering I began my life as a drinker right around the time my monthly visitor began to visit I really had no conception of PMS or even a regular cycle without the pill. My hormones were way out of wack.. Ive crazy mood swings and acne every month since becoming sober. No need to mince words here- I'm pretty bitchy... And pathetically self- pitying- then "Oh wow! That's why! When a few days later my monthly frenemy visits. Also, I love what Mark had to say about applying common sense, and many of our lack of it during our drinking. OH!! Beginning my day with 3 or 4 cups of coffee may make me jittery and anxious?? Not eating for 10 hours while chain smoking may make me cranky?? It seems these little nuggets of common sense are big revelations to me LOL. But loving the learning process- sometimes I just have to laugh at myself:)
I have come to the conclusion that I suffer from PMDD which I'm tools gets worse as we get older. I have habits which are already contraindicated if toy don't want a PMS melt down, such as coffee, but you have inspired me to look into some natural means of treating what ails me.
Glad you are finding solutions!
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"And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone-even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned."
Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 84
An addict is WHAT I am but it does not define all of WHO I am.
Col...LMAO!!! Good old common sense. I can relate to so much of what you have said. BTW folks, auto correct is killing me. The word transcribed "toy" in my posts is supposed to read "you." If I created confusion, I hope that clears it up.
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"And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone-even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned."
Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 84
An addict is WHAT I am but it does not define all of WHO I am.
You guys are so great! Thanks so much! Spiritual disease responds to spiritual remedies....and if it aint responding to the spiritual cure....it might be PHYSICAL! Oh eyewwwwww.........I am the old lady in this room (depressing in itself :( ) But at about 47 years old, I noticed a whole new HORROR! Egads! Instead of having 25 good days and 5 bad days per month.....It flopped to 5 good to 25 bad.....Holy Hell what is THIS???? Effen menopause (aka mentalpause lol)!!!! How many menopausal women does it take to screw in a lightbulb???? ONE *!!#*!*#***!!!?!?!***^*# Damn it!!!!!! LOL! We dont sleep for about a decade, due to hot-fricken flashes! ( No wonder we're just a teensy bit grumpy...) And OH YEA! If you notice you are growing a beard, as fast as your teenage son.....you MIGHT be menopausal! Eyeww....fat,hairy, grey, blotchy, wrinkled (luckily your eyes go...so only OTHER people can see what has become of your face LOL)............ For us alcoholic women, who suffer with destroyed self esteem, on our best days.....well......I so did NOT sign up for this!!!! H O W E V E R.....Its just one more instance where I "get to" experience the "thrill of challenge for another opportunity for application of A.A. techniques" (Keys of the Kingdom)...................At ten years sober...I experienced a moment of Truth....I realized, in my guts, that had I taken just ONE MORE DRINK, I would have NEVER made it back....and on that day...I KNEW, I would not still be alive! Sooooooooo......I may be a beat up, menopausal widow in a wheelchair....but for a DEAD chick, I look pretty darn good!!!! Wheeeeeeeee! MENOPAUSE!!!! LOL!!!! Peace! Blessings and Sobriety on each of you! Love, Lady Eli! :)
