So, there's this guy I know, I've known for close to 2 years. It's a sordid, complicated relationship that began as a coworker friendship that dissolved into a very messy situation involving lots of gossip and a lot of sexual harrassment on his part. I pretty much all but quite this job because of this, working only occasionally with him. Well, due to unforseen circumstances, I will be working with him again more often. When I met him he was 3 years sober and very vocal about it.. He relasped. As I was still in the midst of active alcoholism while all this stuff was going on with him, I didn't realize that much of his behavior was due to his picking up again. Flash forward to tonight at work... I'm looking to pick up shifts at the restaurant we work at, and he asks me to pick up a particular shift because he wants to get his 1 year medallion. Of course I'm going to. He then tells me (while I'm trying to walk away, cuz I "dont like this person" haha- I'm a jerk) that he feels like he should feel happier about getting one year, and he can't seem to get beyond the 3rd step. Well, since the only reason I'm even speaking to him at all is that I'm working the 4th step (lol.. He was on the resentment list) I realize the strange way my HP is in this situation. See, this man, though I "don't like him" is a BIG part of the reason I found AA and realized I was an alcoholic ( long story- I've posted about it here a while ago- no need to rehash). I realize I'm not at all angry with this guy anymore. I realize that we are talking recovery and he's showing respect for me and wants some guidance or help. I also realize that this is how the program works- he helped me by planting the seeds of AA, and now I can help him in his own journey. AND I don't have to "not like him" anymore haha. Strange, huh?
I've heard a lot of stories in my association with AA over the years, but wow, if this does come close to 'taking the cake' ... sounds like things work out a lot better when you guys help each other, but I know, he has to respect your boundaries or it could cause some really sh!tty stuff to happen ... continue to take 'baby steps' here ... sounds like you are doing great, glad to hear it ... thanks for your share ...
Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
In Recovery 'More is continually revealed" Thanks for sharing how WE do it..................Jimi sang about it while back ,,he said' Have you ever been experienced,not necessarily stoned ,but beautiful!! Keep doing the work, its beautiful..............
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
Furthermore, this is a guy and situation that I've spent much time pondering and speaking to my HP about.. Very strange that the only reason I was working there last night-or at all anymore is because I got the ax from my other job. I was about to quite this particular job altogether (largely due to past issues with this coworker). Just before i began my shift I was having a talk with my HP, asking that I have an open mind and heart. Odd. Also, Jimi Hendrix was on the sound system there last night! Not that song, but still so weird you should quote him, mike!!
Col - I've had the situation you just described more times than I can count. Through AA we get to see some of what's going on inside people we would normally dismiss or be constantly irritated by. When I start trying to understand them or see them as just folks with problems...they stop being annoying to me. They become struggling and human at worst and sometimes even likeable at best. I suspect others may have had the same experience with me being the annoying person to them LOL
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
Haha I don't know what you're talking about Pinkchip, but I'VE never been irritating or annoying! I think about that sometimes when I think of what a hot mess I was when drinking- I mean I was straight up insane. All of the people in my life who put up with me? Wow. Guess its my turn to be a little understanding and non judgemental.
Sex ... relationships..love...hate..resentment...all the passions it would seem are resident in your current personna..I was there in my first 90 days..39 years ago..I wonder if Virginia V did in fact stay sober blaming me for whatever..using me as a convenient foil for picking up a drink
Don't be a fool..whatever you do..however you solve or deal with your respective lifes problems..just don't pick up a drink
