Welcome to our MIP group. Of course, as you can see it does happen. Glad you made it back, many don't for that we need to be grateful. We all just have one day, you learned a lot in the 10 years sober that you can build on.
Personally, I bounced in and out for my first serveral months until I completely hit bottom. Thank God and AA have been sober since. I have never seen anyone come back in from drinking and say it was a good idea. Fortunatley I just never felt right unless I stayed connected at meetings.
It's almost always two things that take AA's back to drinking 1.) Self pity. Or 2.) back into self.
If I tell myself I can stay sober without going to meetings, I am telling myself; I don't need to work the steps (12 step work), stop helping others/ doing service work as I others had done for me (character). I start giving myself credit, get out of gratitude and stop taking care of the gift I have been given.
For me, not going to meetings means getting back into self and feeling self important, the very things we need to rid ourselves of in recovery. The fact is, AA is the only reason I have a good life today. How can I walk away?
-- Edited by Rob84 on Monday 12th of November 2012 08:33:11 PM
__________________
Rob
"There ain't no Coupe DeVille hiding in the bottom of a Cracker Jack Box."
I had 10 years sobriety. I then started feeling confident and stopped going to AA meetings. I now have around 2 weeks sobriety. Has this happened to anyone like me with several years sobriety?
You're back now right? So welcome back! Surely over the past 10 yrs you've seen many people like yourself, I sure have over the past year I've been hanging around.
Now your story just gets more interesting, and your eyes see a little bit more clear the "cunning, baffling, POWERFUL" so much more clearly - I hope and pray for that anyway - for you : ) That's how it went for me after relapse. Maybe your story will be enough to convince someone like me today, that I don't have to see what will happen if I let my disease gain the power it never stop desiring.
So thanks for coming back to the solution. I am so grateful for you and your bravery. Your 10 yrs are still just as inspiring, and you are building upon your program humbly right before our eyes.
Again - welcome back : )
__________________
Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
I see it all the time Bob. It was what it was, it is what it is, and it will be what it will be. Someone told me a long time ago...so you were running a good race and you fell down...get up and start running again. We're here for you! Another thing my sponsor told me...train up your sponsorees well for you never know when they'll become your sponsor! Keep comin back, my friend!
I could never get the several years in one package til now ... it took me 13 years off and on in AA to become willing to work the program ... I have a few years now without the need for a drink ... and one of my sponsees has 3 years now after 'going back out' after having had 13 years sober ...
This sponsee said exactly what you just shared, he had 13 years in his pocket and felt 'confident' he could work his own program for a while and not need to go to meetings anymore ... when he stopped his contact with his group, he also lost contact with his sponsor, and you know what comes next ... yes, he also let up on his spiritual contact with his 'higher power' (whom he calls God) ... he says it didn't take long for the feeling he could handle a couple drinks came to him ... a drinking 'binge' reminded him he still needed help, 'on-going' help from his AA friends ... You and he are the lucky ones, the ones that actually find their way back ...
I guess we don't have to spell out to you what you need to do ... go to meetings and when you think you've had enough, go to some more ... you know the routine, just do it ... Dust off your Big Book and re-read it ... and find the old 12 & 12 and re-read it ... but for God's sake, go to a meeting, tonight ...
Love Ya man and God Bless, Pappy
__________________
'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
It happened to me and like Pappy says, just get back in the saddle. Forget the pride you had in your number of years sober and thank your HP of the brief reminder and go on collecting sobriety one day at a time,
Tom
__________________
"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
Hey, welcome, Bob. Yep, I know a guy who will often say, "I should have 30 years sobriety." Seems he stopped going to meetings after 20 years, and yep, he drank again -- for a while.
Yes it happened to me, I drank twice after long term term sobriety, the first time after 3 years, the second time after 7 years, making it back was harder in a way, but once I made it back staying was easier and in a very big way I didn't "lose" anything time wise, as a matter of fact I learned a LOT, I was able to help sponsor people like you when factory models couldn't (because we do share our experience, and factory models don't have experience with slipping after long term sobriety).
just do the deal and you'll have your first year under your belt in no time....unless you aren't done yet...in which case, hang on, it gets miserable..but for me, I been around 20 years 15 of which I have been sober, I'll take it :)
__________________
Light a man a fire and he's warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
We're happy you made it. I'm sorry to hear about your recent relapse. But then again, you're not alone. I was a revolving door member of A.A. myself for many years and with very little sobriety to go by. I had 3, 5 and even 7 years at one time before the bottom dropped out, and I wasn't alone. My current sponsor had 15 years also before he slipped; now he has 20. And the list goes on and on.
The ones who 'do' slip made one crucial mistake; they stopped going to meetings -among other things. I guess they forgot how powerlessness really works. Some of those people got back up rather quickly and continued on with their routine as if nothing ever happened. Others, however, weren't so lucky; they just faded away like the sun. So keep your guard up as you proceed.
The key to anyone's success is to admit your mistake (first) and then move on from there. It's a crucial step towards lasting sobriety. You can make 'this' happen once again -just like before; all you really need is some encouragement and a great sober network. The rest you'll learn along the way. Welcome back...
-- Edited by Mr_David on Tuesday 13th of November 2012 03:15:16 AM
I'm well into my third decade of recovery and thank God, never thought that I could stay sober on my own. I hear way to many stories of those who go to AA, stop drinking, then stop going to meetings. Sometimes they come back, sometimes you read their obituaries, but most you never hear from again.
The bottom line for me is that AA gives me a daily repreve from my alcoholism, so I have to continuously work the program.
Welcome home, Bob. :) It's lovely to have you here.
__________________
I think there's an invisible principle of living...if we believe we're guided through every step of our lives, we are. Its a lovely sight, watching it work.
Thank you all for the encourgement. All of you have some very good advice. I can tell you are on the right track. I'm going to a meeting in 45 minutes.
Welcome back Bob! Glad to have you here with us. This reminds me of: we'll see how our experience can benefit others. Your recents events are now part of your past. Your E, S & H. They'll become an asset to you and others in The Program. What a gift which is in disguise at the moment. Keep coming back and share your journey with us.
Thank you, Bob. I need to save this thread. Ive been feeling better the last 3 days which I need to be careful of because it's making me arrogant. I'm feeling stronger than alcohol. I know I'm not, but that little enemy in my brain is telling I am; I've beat it in 18 days. Really, I'm doing better because I'm reading the big book daily, taking time out for self-care, and practicing the slogans until I can get to my next meeting. I need to hear from others like you that without AA and my higher power I will lose myself again. Today, I am grateful for your share and one more day of sobriety. Love, Chaya
Hello Chaya, I just returned from a meeting. It was a very good meeting. This group has 26 meetings a week and is only 5 minutes away so I don't have an excuse to not go to meetings. I have been looking forward to meetings. I always feel better after a meeting and I am still sober.
Yep, Bob, it happened to me too, at 17 years, 11 months and a week sober. Same story: stopped going to meetings gradually at about 16 years. It was a tough road returning for the first 18 months or so of this new phase of my sobriety. In fact, it was my serious discomfort, especially in meetings, that drove me to find this board after I had been sober for over a year. It has now been over six years, and all I can tell you is that "it gets better." I learned to be less concerned about sobriety "time" and more concerned about each day in which I am living and sober. My relationship with my Higher Power has been significantly strengthened during this past 6 years, principally as a result of a diligent practice of Step 11.
By the way, when I came back to A.A. in September 2006, my sponsor took me to a meeting where a woman who had been sober 39 years and relapsed was taking a 30 day chip. It can literally happen to anyone when we cease growing in A.A. and rest on our laurels. You and I are blessed to have made it back. Welcome back!!!
I had 10 years sobriety. I then started feeling confident and stopped going to AA meetings. I now have around 2 weeks sobriety. Has this happened to anyone like me with several years sobriety?
Keep coming back and share your journey with us.