Yeah, I would look down on me if I wasn't me. I'm worse on myself than I am on others in this regard. That's the really screwy part. That's the HUGE reminder (gift) for me, of just how judgmental I am. Just how much character assassination I need to work the steps on, and ask for this defect of character I have to be removed. In time, His time, not mine - humbly ask - not demand - with the idea that I can be then better equipped to do His work - the work I was meant to do - not want to do - or think I have control over doing. I have such a long way to go, but I'm having fun trying to get there : )
The drill for me: We are ALL just who, what, when, where and why we are what we are suppose to be. It's just outta my friggin hands! LOL Accept it - serenity prayer!
Hope your noggin feels better soon : ) and thanks for the post Mike - I loved it.
-- Edited by justadrunk on Wednesday 10th of October 2012 02:10:08 PM
__________________
Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
I've learned through The 12 Step process and working The Program of AA that a power outside myself exist. He was always there for me, but I would walk through the gifts and treated them as accomplishments. The lessons sent my way(many of them painful) I blew through and failed to heed the warnings. These to me where set-backs alright, but my pride and ego kept me from moving forward with learning from them because of my self centered and shelfish nature.
Today, I accept the gifts offered as just that- gifts, not accomplishments, but received with gratititude. The lessons I try to learn from and work with my HP to ferrett out the causes and conditions and resolve with his help to do better in the future. The lessons today are much more subtle than the past- thank you God and AA. But the subtle one's still exist. They always will. I had one today. I was at the gym lifting and I started to drift and my mind focused on an individual that I thought less of in my head. I assassinated his character for a few seconds. Not good. My head was't where my feet were. I went back to finish my set and BANG- smacked my head of the barbell. I looked up and thanked him. I get the message. But, boy that figgin hurt.
Yup, I relate to what your saying. I find my higher power constantly is with me and the gifts I recieve from him I need to look for, its not in the form of material things, but I seem to find my higher power seems to dictate the outcome of things, the way things work out in my life is a lot to do with how and what Im doing, and its constantly looked at by my hp. I thought I was crazy at first but Ive found that there is something greater than ourselves in this world, and everything we do and say matters, without going to an idiotic degree, you gotta watch things.
I had a similar situation just yesterday. I, yes stupidly, made a little fun of someone in my head even went so far as to compare them to me. Not nice at all but I quickly learned my lesson. I made such a bad performance at the same thing I was comparing too just earlier and it brought me down MANy notches. It is funny how life works out that way. I am no better or worse than anyone else and I need to remember to keep myself in check. And when I didn't this time I was shown a bit of humilty for it.
Great insight Mike. I second the pride and ego thing as well; it's something I need to work on every day. The A.A. preamble states: "There's no perfect adherence to these principles" just a set of ideals we strive for everyday. Now that's something I can live with. Thanks again for reminding me of that. Heads up next time.
Not good. My head was't where my feet were. I went back to finish my set and BANG- smacked my head of the barbell. I looked up and thanked him. I get the message. 
But, boy that figgin hurt. 
