Just called a previous sponsee for a chew of the fat. He tells me he's a/ drinking, b/ threatened his partner and c/ intends to travel to another city and is 'tooled up'. (i.e. has weapons and is prepared to use them)
I do not believe him on point c. it's possible, but I think it's drunken ranting - apparantly his brother has been shot, his other brother has just come out of jail and he was going to the other city to redress the balance. Also claims he was attaced last night, wrested the gun off his assialant and popped him in the leg with it (I take that to mean he shot the other feller) - again, I think this is bulshit drunken ranting.
all this he was bellowing on a train station platform. I told him to go home. Maybe he's been overheard and busted by now.
Just dawned on me that as I told him to go home, maybe due to points a and b I've unwittingly put others at risk.
well as he hadn't been kicked out the house last night maybe that's up to his partner to address.
Can't get a hold of my sponsor just yet to ask his guidance, so thought I'd write this out here. Need to talk to sponsor.
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It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
Tough one Bill. But, yes it appears you've done what you can. We carry The Message not The Alcoholic. Time to step aside and give this one to a loving God and see what he has planned. Stay well and your Sponsee may return for help and a willingness to listen and try something different. Then you can continue on Carrying The Message. Also, worth pointing out that your biggest problem today isn't yours.
Oh man BB, ... you give a whole new meaning the the words 'tooled up' ...
I agree with Mike B ... we can't carry our sponsees, just teach them what we know and live the example they need to see ... WOW ... not sure I'd want to have any 'private' sessions with this dude ... ... ... I carry a weapon too, but have never even thought to be aggressive, it's just for protection, and I never carried while drinking either ... Well, honestly, when I was drinking I could never afford to carry ... it's just as well, that way no-one got hurt ... except from my drinking, of course ...
It may be enough of a cause to get the 'authorities' involved? ... maybe? ... tough decision here ... I certainly would want him to injure or kill someone ... I know, the anonymity thingy ... but man, I might have trouble just sitting on my hands and ignoring the situation, ya know? ... I know, I know, he could be making all this up too, then you'd come out looking like a shithead ... Tough deal here man ... wish you the best!!!
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
well Pappy - i don't know his last name, don't know his address - what do i do, call the plod and say there's a bloke I don't know his name, i don't know where he lives, but he's off his face and bubbling on about this and that..........
it's easy when you're on the ground and a drunk is trying to drive away - snatch the keys, call the law, but when you're 250 miles away.........
Like i said, rang aa trusted friend, talked it through, decided I done all I could.
I told the guy to go home and call me when he got there. So far he hasn't.......I feel i've done all i can..........i told him when i left england, well before in fact, that he needs to find a new sponsor........so far none suit him.........
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It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
AAAAAh, ... there's a distance problem to consider ... I thought you and he were in the same city and, you know, you might could get a car plate number or something ... Sorry, my misconception ... in that case, I also believe you've done as much as you can already ...
Only thing left now, is pray he doesn't hurt somebody nor himself ... it may be good that you have some distance from him ... you know, in case he goes all bonkers or something ...
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Great post Bill : ) My sponsor - now sober 10 yrs - also mentioned to me the other night that she only has one other sponsee that stayed sober other than me ( 4 yrs) - and I don't really count for much at 6 months lol. It's eye opening!
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
Thanks for sharing. I agree with the second string sponsor for this guy. If you want to do something else, just go to a meeting and help a drunk that wants to stay sober.
Rob
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Rob
"There ain't no Coupe DeVille hiding in the bottom of a Cracker Jack Box."
Thanks Bill for the memories. Been there and done that myself and while I can remember what took place they can't...LOL I also had the other end of the stick too where I was the drunk and tooled up. Going at it with an active, lit up alky is fantasy land. I didn't listen to those trying to care about me and the ones I was trying to care about didn't either. Ain't it a grand chemical we are addicted to? Turn him over...Let go and Let God. Great attempt.
Tough one Bill. But, yes it appears you've done what you can. We carry The Message not The Alcoholic. Time to step aside and give this one to a loving God and see what he has planned. Stay well and your Sponsee may return for help and a willingness to listen and try something different. Then you can continue on Carrying The Message. Also, worth pointing out that your biggest problem today isn't yours.
Amen Mike. It's time you cleared the air of this one, period. It's up to God now.
I'd try and call him sober and assess the real threat value. (if that's possible and if he is going to ever be sober) If a client said that to me in a session, I would have to call the police. As a sponsor, your duties are not spelled out that way. There are no "duty to warn" laws for sponsors. Laws in UK are different too. I'm thinking you are more concerned with your moral duty though rather than legal. If you believed him to actually have the capacity to commit violent acts and that anyone was in imminent danger, that would change your course of action. Otherwise, I think you are okay.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
So he called me, in tears, begging to come see me - sure, no problem, trains run up here - well he doesn't have the money - well I ain't lending him it - been caught out too many times before by others - so he scrounged the money from someone and.............. went on the lash.
Still drinking, still smoking, no sponsor suits, I called his missus to find out if he was on his way up here, poor lass at her wits end, but another one that won't take help, so I've done all i can, she's as safe as she wants to be, he's off his face somewhere and I'm getting on with the business of being me.
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It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
