We might next ask ourselves what we mean when we say that we have "harmed" other people. What kinds of "harm" do people do one another, anyway? To define the word "harm" in a practical way, we might call it the result of instincts in collision, which cause physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual damage to people.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 80
I had been to Eighth Step meetings, always thinking, "I really haven't harmed many people, mostly myself." But the time came when I wrote my list out and it was not as short as I thought it would be. I either liked you, disliked you, or needed something from youit was that simple. People hadn't done what I wanted them to do and intimate relationships were out of hand because of my partners' unreasonable demands. Were these "sins of omission"? Because of my drinking, I had "dropped out"never sending cards, returning calls, being there for other people, or taking part in their lives. What a grace it has been to look at these relationships, to make my inventories in quiet, alone with .the God of my understanding, and to go forth daily, with a willingness to be honest and forthright in my relationships.
"The alcoholic is absolutely unable to stop drinking on the basis of self-knowledge. We must admit we can do nothing about it ourselves. Will power and self-knowledge will never help in the strange mental blank spots when we are tempted to drink. An alcoholic mentally is in a very sick condition. The last flicker of conviction that we can do the job ourselves must be snuffed out. The spiritual answer and the program of action are the only hope. Only spiritual principles will solve our problems. We are completely helpless apart from Divine help. Our defense against drinking must come from a Higher Power." Have I accepted the spiritual answer and the program of action?
Meditation for the Day
Rest now until life, eternal life, flowing through your veins and heart and mind, bids you to bestir yourself. Then glad work will follow. Tired work is never effective. The strength of God's spirit is always available to the tired mind and body. He is your physician and your healer. Look to these quiet times of communion with God for rest, for peace, for cure. Then rise refreshed in spirit and go out to work, knowing that your strength is able to meet any problems because it is reinforced by God's power.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that the peace I have found will make me effective. I pray that I may be relieved of all strain during this day.
Thank you for posting this! "dropped out"? Yup, that's me. If people didn't meet my high expectations, I simply "punished" them by ignoring them. I was really punishing myself, and isolating further. And giving myself more justification for resentment. Very childish. It's going on my 4th step inventory immediately:)
I dropped out too. I felt worthless - didn't think I had anything worthwhile to talk about, write about, visit for - I was right. I didn't have a life - it was just drinking. Now I have a life - and confidence to make a call, and talk for a while.
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
