Steve, good on you for reaching out, coming back, and being humbly ready to start again. If you get sober, even a couple years down the road, the 8 months (that you think that you lost) won't matter at all. Like I said in the PM, you'll just have to work your program as if you are single, going to meetings daily and getting your obsession back to sobriety, doing all those things that you've heard other doing to get and stay sober. You can do it. I relapsed every month or two, for two whole years. I could never make it to 3 months, until I got divorced and it was just me alone to sit in my sh*t, get a higher power, work the steps with all earnestness and recover. Get busy my friend, you can do it.
-- Edited by StPeteDean on Wednesday 8th of August 2012 05:23:56 AM
Hard to admit, especially since I was doing so good and many members I was talking to in PM even said that I might due to my EARLY marriage...(was this a setup to faIl)? I dont know I just pray you all can forgive me and accept that I am coming back honest and open, after 8 months of sobriety I F'D up but I am back here again, from day one, thanking my HP I am alive and hoping I can learn from this... one day at a damn time.. what else caN i DO? 8 MONTHS SEEMS SO LONG TO DO AGAIN... ;(
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God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
"Though I know how hurt and sorry you must be after this slip, please do not worry about a temporary loss of your inner peace. As calmly as you can, just renew your effort on the A.A. program, especially those parts of it which have to do with meditation and self-analysis."
Glad you made it back, MANY don't! What are you going to do different this time? Just For Today you never have to drink alcohol again!! Peace in God's grace and mercy
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
So many people don't make it back. I am really glad you did, Steve. Thanks for helping to keep me sober today. :)
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I think there's an invisible principle of living...if we believe we're guided through every step of our lives, we are. Its a lovely sight, watching it work.
You've learned a lot no doubt. When I relapsed, I was so concerned with not being able to say I had more time than what I did. But now I realize, I don't need a big stamp that says I have a certain amount of sober time, for people to like me, or respect me... if I like me, and I respect me. I'm just working to stay sober TODAY like you, and everyone else. I appreciate your honesty - I know how hard it is to choke out those words.
For me, the lesson that appears as a gift from my HP was to not get ahead of myself, to stay humble about sober time always - and know the warning signs and when I need to kick my program into high gear - and learn how.
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
Hey Steve, Honestly. Every day you are sober is a day sober, and every day drunk is a day drunk. I relapsed after a loooong time sober and although it was not a wonderful event, it was a short event in a long chain of sobriety. Do not get hung up on the length of success, just honestly try to succeed each day. I really think I am preaching to the choir here because I have seen your honest work and transformation, and I have no doubt you "know the drill". This lapse was just another reminder to you what great lengths your disease will resort to, and how it will sneak up on you. Press on. Tom
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"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
We all have moments of weakness ... We've watched your progress and know that you have the basics ... just go back to practicing the principles in all you do ... be sure to take in as many meetings as you possibly can ... I learned that if I slacked off going to meetings it was like I started running low on 'Ammo' for the next 'conflict' ... and if you run out of 'Ammo' then alcohol is right around the corner to capture you ... Looks like you escaped his hold, so lets get back to work and do what you and I know works to keep our guns 'full' of 'Ammo' ...
Glad you didn't stay out too long, and I'm even more glad of your returning with "TOTAL HONESTY"
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
One thing that comes to mind Steve is over the corse of your membership on the board, you've been in and out a few times. I don't recall any threads from you saying that you're considering drinking. There is this concept called "telling on yourself". Part of that is picking up the phone and calling people (sponsor, people that give you thier number in meetings...) to tell them when you start having "stinking thinking" and that you're wanting to drink. Usually those thoughts come and go, so if you can pick up the phone, or come in here and talk to someone, they can usually talk you through it, till the urge passes. Seems were only getting two kinds of messages from you. "I'm doing great" or "I'm no longer sober" and nothing inbetween. This disease compels it's sufferers to maintain secrecy so the denial came exist. When we come clean with others , the denial goes *Poof* and it's gone. If you feel like drinking tell us, call you sponsor, and get you @$$ to a meeting.
continue to be willing to tell on yourself, Steve. it is not how much time we have, it is staying sober today that counts. we love you and there is nothing to forgive, you are an alcoholic and drinking is what we do, until we start making different choices. AA helps me make the healthier choices, and my AA friends support me in making good choices. i am so much happier without alcohol. alcohol never made ANYTHING better, only worse. it numbed me and enabled me to keep on making deadly choices. we love you and want you to be healthy and happy. hugs from sheila
I found sobriety worked a lot better when I stopped swapping one addiction for another and learned to walk a mile in my own shoes
There's a reason for all those funny little sayings you hear in AA like "no new relationships for a year" and "Work the steps"
That being said, Welcome Back, took me awhile to make it back when I went out, and I had to stand at the door fumbling with the key for a long time before the door just seemed to open on it's own, it's hard to explain, we can't force that door to open (sobriety) but sure as hell if we aren't banging on it day after day when it opens we wont be there, the key is willingness, which is different then despair and "I want", willingness means being willing to follow suggestions....like no new relationships for a year.
It takes what it takes Steve, you did good, now don't despair and build on what you had, rather then throwing it all away, you keep coming back your relapse will be a positive thing, wallow in self pity and remorse and I'm here to tell you it will get a LOT worse before it gets better, and it dont get better for most of us, keep coming back Steve, don't drink even if your ass falls off, If Tipsy McStagger can get sober, ANYONE can get sober (yes, this is a challenge)
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Light a man a fire and he's warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
Your 8 months were not in vain, Steve. Look at what you've learned during that time. Yeah, you had an interruption in your sobriety, but your back Steve and that's what matters most of all. Welcome back...
Steve - Glad you are back there are too many that don't. I used again after 15 months I didn't relaps I went out to use luckly it was only a couple of week ends. My concern at the time just before I picked up the bottle was how many days do I have, not what could the consequences be. After 35 years of sobriety it isn't how long other than today. I didn't loose those 15 months they will always be there they just aren't added on to now. What I learned wasn't forgotten, people were wtill there all that changed for me was the realization that I hadn't been working a program and the result was alcohol won as I didn't have the spiritual program/life to fight my addiction.
Do what yo know to do and keep coming back and it will be 8 months in 8 months but today is the day that matters.
