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Post Info TOPIC: Just wondering.....
Mr_David


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Just wondering.....
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Tracey C wrote:

Hi,

For the last 21 days I have been working a program called the Love Dare.  I came across it after someone recommended watching the movie Fireproof.  It is a christian based program, looking at our own behaviours and developing better relationships with our HP and others.  

For myself it has/is bringing up lots of character defects and my resistance at various times to accepting the love of my HP.  I mean how could he/she love me when I wasn't good enough for my own parents, even now.  Thankfully those thoughts/feelings don't come up as often anymore.

Basically the Love Dare is about  undertaking one dare each day eg Day 1 - Say nothing negative to your spouse.  Seeing my hubby's away working for 2 weeks at a time, I've been completing it with my children.  Being a homeschooling Mum, I have plenty of opportunities to complete it.  Amazingly though my phone calls with my hubby has been a lot better and when he came home it was the best few days together we had for a long time.  

I guess my question is have any of you used other programs/methods as well as the 12 step programs?  In one way maybe it is like a counselling session without going to one.  It does mention in the book that counsellors have suggested the book to patients.

Tracey

I've been part of another fellowship called "Celebrate Recovery". They've help me transition better to the Christian faith, more than A.A. I feel it's been worth the time and effort I put into it, kind of like A.A. But that's just me. I hope this helps.



-- Edited by Mr_David on Thursday 2nd of August 2012 09:37:09 PM

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Mr.David
Tracey C


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Hi,

For the last 21 days I have been working a program called the Love Dare.  I came across it after someone recommended watching the movie Fireproof.  It is a christian based program, looking at our own behaviours and developing better relationships with our HP and others.  

For myself it has/is bringing up lots of character defects and my resistance at various times to accepting the love of my HP.  I mean how could he/she love me when I wasn't good enough for my own parents, even now.  Thankfully those thoughts/feelings don't come up as often anymore.

Basically the Love Dare is about  undertaking one dare each day eg Day 1 - Say nothing negative to your spouse.  Seeing my hubby's away working for 2 weeks at a time, I've been completing it with my children.  Being a homeschooling Mum, I have plenty of opportunities to complete it.  Amazingly though my phone calls with my hubby has been a lot better and when he came home it was the best few days together we had for a long time.  

I guess my question is have any of you used other programs/methods as well as the 12 step programs?  In one way maybe it is like a counselling session without going to one.  It does mention in the book that counsellors have suggested the book to patients.

Tracey



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Stepchild


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I've never heard of it....It doesn't sound like it would harm you in any way...Identifying and working on charactor defects sounds like a useful tool to go along with the steps...Another way to practice the principles of the program I guess....Have you worked the steps with a sponsor already?

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Pythonpappy


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Sorry Tracy, ... I have never tried other 'formal' programs for alcoholism other than AA ... ALTHOUGH, I have tried many other 'methods' to get and stay sober from books that claimed you could get sober without AA ... None of them worked ... Short of eating 'bark' and drinking 'rain water' only ... I found i'd rather die drinking ... LOL



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justadrunk


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Hey Tracey - that's so cool you are homeschooling! We will be doing that as well, but not until after elementary at our Montessori school.
Anyway - yes, I have done something sort of like what you're talking about - it was a pretty simple addition to my program. No complaining. Can't complain PERIOD - to the hubby to anyone. It helped our marriage, I couldn't believe how many times I caught myself doing it without thinking. The goal is to make it 7 days, each time you fail, starting over. Kind of as a "get out of the habit of it" type thing. I slowly revert back to it, and then do the 7 days again periodically.

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Stepchild


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Tracey C wrote:

Stepchild - In a lot of ways it's very similar to 12 step programs  ie One day at a time, praying, letting go.  Actually the dare for today is to be intentional,  about making a time to pray and read your bible.  Then it asked the questions How do you think spending time daily with God will change your situation and perspective?  How can you make Him a bigger part of your day?  I don't think it will hurt me.

 I don't think it will either...As a matter of fact...I think I'll do that today myself.

I'm still curious if you have taken the steps?



-- Edited by Stepchild on Friday 3rd of August 2012 06:27:09 AM

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Tracey C


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Thank you everyone for your replies.

Stepchild - In a lot of ways it's very similar to 12 step programs  ie One day at a time, praying, letting go.  Actually the dare for today is to be intentional,  about making a time to pray and read your bible.  Then it asked the questions How do you think spending time daily with God will change your situation and perspective?  How can you make Him a bigger part of your day?  I don't think it will hurt me.

Python -  I wouldn't want to do that either lol.  

Tasha - We've been homeschooling now for around 9 1/2 yrs.  It's certainly been a journey.  At the moment I school 4 children aged 7 - 13 and our 4 yr old does it occasionally. Our eldest has finished now (she's 21).  She's out living her own life now.    I do love it and they all seem to be  learning well.

It is like what you mentioned.  Each day it's something different to work on.  It certainly points out my weaknesses.

David - I looked up Celebrate Recovery.  It seems interesting too.  I tried going to church on and off over the years.  After a while it just didn't seem to fit me anymore.  This seems to have a different outlook to it.

 



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vixen


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I participate in Celebrate Recovery as well. It is 12 step based and ties in perfectly with my AA fellowship. :)

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Pythonpappy


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Okay, I found two groups within ten miles of me ... one meets Tues. 6pm and the other meets Thur. 6pm ... different church bldg.s ... Does this sound right? ... and is it like our AA meetings? ... (the first ones I found were in Australia ... My time constraints make those a little harder to get to ... LOL)



-- Edited by Pythonpappy on Friday 3rd of August 2012 03:02:10 PM

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Pythonpappy


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Is this 'Celebrate Recovery' an 'on-line' program or something much bigger??? ... Are there local chapters or groups or whatever??? ... I'm curious AND interested!!!

Thanks,
Pappy



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Mr_David


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Pythonpappy wrote:

Is this 'Celebrate Recovery' an 'on-line' program or something much bigger??? ... Are there local chapters or groups or whatever??? ... I'm curious AND interested!!!

Thanks,
Pappy

Their actual groups Pappy and not just online. They meet in similar settings as does A.A. You can check out the group finder below if your curious enough or if your interested in joining yourself. Here's the link:

http://www.celebraterecovery.com/



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Mr.David
Pythonpappy


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Thanks Mr. David ... I'll check it out ...



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Neophyte


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I looked up the first 3 days... This is great! This may also help me be more open minded about the bible.

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Mr_David


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Pythonpappy wrote:

Okay, I found two groups within ten miles of me ... one meets Tues. 6pm and the other meets Thur. 6pm ... different church bldg.s ... Does this sound right? ... and is it like our AA meetings? ... (the first ones I found were in Australia ... My time constraints make those a little harder to get to ... LOL)



-- Edited by Pythonpappy on Friday 3rd of August 2012 03:02:10 PM

Yeah, Pappy it does sound about right.  Celebrate Recovery has a 12 step format similar to an A.A. meeting, just Christian based that's all. I hope you check it out. Australia is a bit far for me too (LOL).  



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Mr.David
Tracey C


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Stepchild I was just starting looking at my 4th step inventory, when I came across the Love Dare.  I haven't had a sponsor since Easter.  We had a falling out and I haven't found another one yet.  I am a bit hesitant about finding one actually.  How can I rely on someone when they're know better than off then I am?  My first one used to call me for advice (I do readings for people) and my second one went against myself and my children.  She was also one of my children's sponsor's too, as she was an alateen sponsor.  After this my daughter was very hurt and didn't want to attend her meetings anymore.  Thankfully she has, where she just ignores this lady.  I'm having a bit of trouble sorting it out in my head.

 

Mr David I love the Celebrate Recovery group too.  I looked them up and downloaded a book.  Wow, just wish we had a group near me.  The closest one is about 3 hrs drive.  In the meantime I'll settle for answering the questions and see if I can contact anyone from the group.  



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Stepchild


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Tracey C wrote:

Stepchild I was just starting looking at my 4th step inventory, when I came across the Love Dare.  I haven't had a sponsor since Easter.  We had a falling out and I haven't found another one yet.  I am a bit hesitant about finding one actually.  How can I rely on someone when they're know better than off then I am?  My first one used to call me for advice (I do readings for people) and my second one went against myself and my children.  She was also one of my children's sponsor's too, as she was an alateen sponsor.  After this my daughter was very hurt and didn't want to attend her meetings anymore.  Thankfully she has, where she just ignores this lady.  I'm having a bit of trouble sorting it out in my head.

 I guess you learned something about having the same sponsor as your daughter...That doesn't sound right to me anyway. As far as finding the right one...For me it came down to letting go of ego...Getting out of myself...And most important....Trusting God. I asked for the right one to take me through the steps....An thank God....That's what I got.



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Pythonpappy


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Hey Tracey C, ... ... ... Read that AA 'Sponsorship Pamphlet' ... it's got some great info in there ... and what I did this last time coming in, is I went to every meeting I could make the first 30 days and looked to see who had the kind of sobriety I was looking for, AND who was there at most of the meetings, AND who had a few years sobriety behind them ... AND whose 'higher power' was God ...

With that, we worked well together ... and that was 4 1/2 years ago ...



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