I felt exhausted numerous times during the course of my 90 and 90. So I guess resting was my way of relaxing, finally. I had this mental obsession which caused me to feel tired most of the time. And when you combined that with my living arrangements, it made for a very unstable situation. This restless demeanor in conjunction with my alcoholism made my life a living hell. So sleeping was a welcome addition to my sober routine. If it were me, I wouldn't get too caught up with the whole sleep concept/idea unless I thought there was an actual problem. But, again, only you can tell dear. So think it through, okay.
You said earlier and I'm quoting here: "I'm on the right track, I think". Your attending meetings, are you not? And what about a sponsor dear, you've got one of those too, right? These questions are not meant to embarrass you dear but for us to get to know you, that's all. So if you've answered yes to at least one of the two questions then you should be fine. But if you've gotten off track, somehow, then get yourself back on board and double up on some meetings, that's all.
If you think there's another problem besides alcoholism then I suggest you get in contact with a therapist or some other sort of counselor. They're good at assessing any condition whether it be alcoholism or whatever. So you might want to take that plunge dear as well, but only if you need too. We're praying for you dear because we know how important meetings really are. So get back to basics and take charge again like you did in the beginning. It will be your next big move in the sober domain we call lasting sobriety, for sure.
-- Edited by Mr_David on Monday 9th of July 2012 02:04:26 AM
Hey guys:) just came back from a meeting and talk w my sponser. I feel great.. I'm enjoying meetings for the most part. Here's the thing.. I took some time off work just for a breather. It was much needed. The week was fine and I took the opportunity to go to new meetings.. On the right track I think. Funny thing though, the past two days I literally just holed up in my apartment sleeping. Like I didnt want to leave my house or be around people.I realized that this is exactly the behavior I exhibited when drinking ( of course, this time no booze). I realize that this is both stupid and dangerous for me, being so newly sober. It's not that I don't think or know that I NEED to go to meetings and not isolate, I just couldn't work up the energy. I'm just so exhausted. But when I go to meetings, I feel so much better. What the f is wrong with me? I'm just frustrated with myself I guess. Some advice or thoughts would be welcome:)
Hey Col...I went to at least 2 meetings a day for my first 90 days...And one meeting a day for my first six months....I didn't miss a day. I wanted this more than anything....Because for me...Getting and staying sober was the only thing that mattered. I'd be gone without it. The thing I learned in doing that....Was the meetings I didn't feel like going to were the ones that needed to be at the most. I just prayed everyday first thing...And one of the things I asked for was strength and willingness...And I got it. And I said thanks at night for that. My advice?....Do what you have to do...To get what you want to get.
Whenever I feel like that, God sends a newcomer or I will be asked to speak at a meeting. When I meet the new man, I gain renewed strength and forget about myself.
Well, I guess I got an "answer" of a sort. I have this daily meditations book from hazelden entitles "keep it simple". The reflection for the day ? (quoted from Epictetus).."first say to yourself what you would be; then do what you have to do". Pretty much exactly what you said, stepchild:)
I just went through a very tired phase Col - you are paying attention to yourself, how your body feels, how your mind feels. That's awesome! But tiring! LOL
I never really knew how my own "womans cycle" went through out the month! Like you - I've been drinking my adult life! I'm starting to realize I'm very tired the week before I get my lovely visitor - and I mean VERY tired. I can tell now that I'm pretty "on fire" for that week before and PMS sucks. I never really knew this because I was either drinking those symptoms away - or pregnant if I wasn't drinking! I was thinking "wow - this is crazy to just be learning about my body in this way in my 30's", but actually, we are young - and exactly where we are suppose to be!
Sounds to me like you're doing great ; )
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
the past two days I literally just holed up in my apartment sleeping. Like I didnt want to leave my house or be around people.
I do this occasionally to this day, like, once a week lol (I climb trees for a living so get exhausted, a friend of mine who does the same thing just did a half iron man and he said it was easy compared to what I do on a daily basis).
Anyway, I have done this periodically since I got sober, the key for me is to not "overstay my welcome" and to break out quickly, if I stay sleeping it's unhealthy, I get into an emotional "vapor lock" and it's difficult to break it, however, if I listen to my body, rest when I need to and then push myself into action within 36 to 48 hours I feel it's healthy.
For me getting sober (and staying sober) is a lot like a rabbit finding a burrow, I'm finally "safe" and can stop carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders, which I don't even realize I was doing, but when I feel "safe" I can finally relax, like deeply relax, which means rest, which means sleep.
I think all things in moderation are good, and for me that includes the occasional two days in pajamas recharging my emotional and physical batteries, and once again, this is just me, but my "cut off" is 48 hours, after that it's laziness and vapor lock, now I have done this for 20 years in varying degrees, and I don't know how much of this is tied into the fact I do have such an incredibly physical job, but I had to make peace with it and find a good balance, but I feel occasionally resting and just....I don't know...resting...being alone at home is such a good thing, for me the critical part is getting off my butt -after- that 36-48 hours, go for a walk, run, drive, mow the lawn, get the blood flowing.
I think occasionally recharging our mental, physical, and spiritual batteries is a good thing, but that is by no means a recomendation, just an opinion and my experience, it's one of the ways I manage my physical and emotional well being, take the rest when needed then kick myself in the pants and get moving before I go into "vapor lock", an object in motion stays in motion, an object at rest stays at rest, so I try to not stop moving for too long or I lock up emotionally and physically and it's detrimental, but avoiding the rest for me just postpones the crash.
It's OK to be human, it's OK to sit still, but it's important to pay attention to our bodies and minds, balance and moderation is a good thing
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Light a man a fire and he's warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
