one thing that came to me today is "what are the defects that are most glaring in my life?" and after thinking about having them removed, as step 6 talks about, i thought "what exactly am i doing to work on them (changing my behaviour concerning that defect) and i realized i have acknowledged them and have shared them with another human, but have dropped the ball. i am not actively changing my behavior. i have been waiting for God to remove them without me being an active part in/of that process. i am thinking it works kind of like keeping a 'conscious contact with my God.' i need to keep a conscious contact with my behaviours and acknowledge the ones i skim over by telling myself they aren't so bad and end up ignoring them. i have been waiting for them to magically disappear. yes, i still look for the easier softer way. this is a program of faith, yes, but i have to Walk (action) in faith, not substitute faith in this 12 step program for working this program that is saving my life and growing spirituality in my life. i keep coming back, i have to, or i forget what my life is all about. sheila
Hey Shelia! Excellent job of moving along in the solution(something we will do over and over again)
The early key we find in this step is "WE were entirely ready",a process often taking place over our lifetimes.. For me,entirely ready is a culmination of reaching a spiritual state where we are not just aware of of our defects,not just really tired of them and not just confident God(of our understanding) will remove what should go but all the above...
I know for me I really resisted some things,(gambling,certain areas of life I kept maintaining,some fears well if that goes how about this?? more like(for me) survival skills than defects but I know for me I could rationalize myself into just about anything!(still lurks)WE should also remember that our defects are part of each of us.We may always revert back in stressful situations,our humaness..In the 6th WE are preparing to ask God to remove them in our next step.WE continue to look for gradual improvement and not immediate faultlessness(I know I beat myself up a lot) WE learn to live by not just getting through the storm but learn to live by walking in the rain..Anyway enough already Mike,good job JJ keep up the good work.Thanks for sharing.....
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
You contantly have to be working on them...We'll never be perfect...But any progress is good. I look at them like that whack a mole game...As soon as I start getting a handle on one...Another one pops up. All I know...Is I'm a hell of a lot better than I was when I started this program.
Like you mentioned If i keep in the 3d, 10th and 11th steps, trying to carry out God's will and improving conscience contact. The character defects seem to stay more in remission.
Progress not perfection, stay homest and willing.
Rob
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Rob
"There ain't no Coupe DeVille hiding in the bottom of a Cracker Jack Box."
