What are my dreams Tasha? To write a great screenplay someday. Yeah, I know, it sounds all too surreal doesn't it Tasha? But the options are still available for any of us, wouldn't you agree? The only obstacle standing in our way is of course sober living. So I must remain sober in order to fulfill any of my supposed dreams, isn't that right dear? So please do just that, remain that way, okay. Other than that, it's about living life to the fullest today. At least it has for me. I can't imagine where I'd be today if it wasn't for my sober connections though. They've given me a life that is truly worth living, and for that I'm forever grateful. Some of my dreams are still in the works Tasha, but for me it's all about sobriety today, regardless. My dreams don't have an expiration date, and either does sobriety; it's something I need to work on every day. I'll continue to dream just as others will, and with the help of my sober friends near and far, I'll remain true to my primary purpose in life, which as we know is sobriety. I hope you will as well Tasha, for today.
~God Bless~
-- Edited by Mr_David on Saturday 16th of June 2012 11:03:54 PM
Biggest lie thats ever been written. Not trying to start some thing here cause I enjoy your posts tasha but Ive ate from food banks, Ive stole my dinners, Ive slept on the beach, Ive borrowed, begged, been on government cheques, lived in group homes etc and Ive had dreams in my life stronger than most people. Unfourtunatley I spent years drinking, drugging and suffering with a sickness worse than 99% of people will ever know, Im 27 and still sitting awake at 3am each night imagining "What it would be like"
Notice the pen and coffee cup photo, Ive been keeping journals, writing stories and music for over ten years, practicing guitar and right now im trying to get a special scholarship award for people with disabilities to attend a school, constantly thinking every second of my life for over a decade what it would be like if it ever happened, and earlier, I was out with a friend who was helping me get a few groceries cause I couldnt afford to buy them.
-- Edited by Closer on Sunday 17th of June 2012 12:52:49 AM
I'm going to go to Europe and look around the Med. I want to walk in the places that Alexander, Sulla, Diocletion, Hannibal and so many others that shaped the world walked. I come from a very young country where a 150 year old structure is ancient so I want to touch a 500 year old building knowing it's the new kid on the block sitting next to a 2000 year old one.
Always wanted to do it but I kept drinking the savings and then finally I knew that even if I did go it would be a waste of time and money as all I would see would be bars and clubs.
I'm about half way there money wise but I'm not in any hurry as I really want to be 100% comfortable in my sobriety skin before I visit the other half of the world.
Dreams are thoughts ... ... ... Thoughts of good things ... ... ... Dreams are the mind's imagination of 'peace, serenity, and happiness' ... (as a younger person, dreams may include people ... the 'dreamy' guy or the 'dreamy' gal ... ... ... all things looked for in the future ... and for some of us, things wished for in the past ...
All any of us have though, is TODAY ... Dreams can sometimes inspire hope ... Dreams can spark the imagination into action that will result in things being done to cause what we desire to come true ... Like the 'Wright Bros.' and their dream of flight ... or of the Nasa scientists and their dream of man walking on the moon ... etc.
Dreams as we sleep, however, are totally different issues altogether ... We may have dreams of the past and be terrorized by them, or dream of 'drinking/drugging' and find we enjoyed the few minutes of pleasure, only to be terrorized by the realization that a hangover/relapse was going to be a part of it ... (it may be so freakin' real that we start to sweat, or shake, or get sick to the stomach, before we 'snap' out of it ...) -OR- when these dreams occur, we can simply write it off as a simple 'thought' and be comforted that we have no worries unless we act on that 'thought' ... ('act' meaning that we take action to make the dream real) ...
Since I have a tendency to over-analyze everything, I just had to expand on this 'dream' issue ... ... ...
Dreams are good to have, great, in fact, if they are of the kind that visualize a better tomorrow ... If I had not dreamed it possible to live a sober life, and if you folks had not proved that that dream was a real possibility, then I'd, no doubt, have been dead a long time ago ... So, I am grateful to you guys, and others like you, for showing me that dreams can and do come true when you have faith, hope, and love in God ...
Take Care and God Bless, Pappy
P.S. Another great topic Tasha, Thanks ...
-- Edited by Pythonpappy on Sunday 17th of June 2012 10:17:06 AM
__________________
'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Thanks Natasha. I found that with God all things are possible. Sobriety became possible when it seemed impossible, and when I gave up myself. Not only did God get me sober, but He provided me with the best life I have ever known.
Having dreams for the future sure does contradict the "live in today" movement and mind set of AA doesn't it?
Even so, I find it a wonderful way to get to know people. I never had goals or dreams until now. I was sure I would never accomplish any of them, that I would drink them away, so I just didn't bother. The only time I thought of the future honestly, was when I was picking out what music I wanted at my funeral. Sometimes I would make recordings of myself singing or reading books, so my children could listen to them after I had drank myself to death.
For me to start dreaming of the future is a very new and wonderful feeling. I feel them now, through my HP's gift of life to me. The undercurrent is always "I have been given a second chance". The first thing that entered my heart and mind was to become a music therapist. I think my gift of song writing could benefit all sorts of people in need of inspiration and hope. Especially people like I once was - the dying. Whoever/However that might be. I can picture myself at peoples bedsides playing my guitar and singing, or working with people who have special challenges in life. Probably never something I will do as a monetary job, but from what little I've done this in the past, I know it is a HP's work through me.
Also, I dream of living more off the land and making less of an impact on God's earth. Last year when I was rotating chickens each morning at 6am, sweating and shaking for a drink, I gave up. Now I know I could feed nutritious pure food to myself and many more people off the few acres I own. I always gave up on gardening like everything else in my life. I was drinking while plucking feathers with my family, and little help. I am capable of this kind of work today, and I've wasted that gift far too long. I dream of building a greenhouse, and having fresh vegetables year round for myself and neighbors (what a treat in Wisconsin!). I gather eggs in the morning, and make my breakfast. Last week, I gave many dozen eggs to members of my home group. It felt good to know they would not be hungry that day. I dream of a full breakfast: eggs, milk, bacon, fresh berries, and much more some day!
I have dreams for the AA club which hasn't been touched in 40 years. Everything is ready for some paint, deep cleaning and love.
There is so much more - and it's also just a dream of being the best I can be today, with the gift I've been given today. Today is yesterday's tomorrow... so really all we have. But I have enjoyed dreaming of things other than my demise.
Thank you all for sharing, and Closer - your honesty is wonderful - thank you for posting what you did. One of my old fears was loosing a finger or hand, meaning I could no longer play the piano - but now I see that God's work will always be the greatest joy no matter how it "plays out" and the possibilities are endless!
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
Do it Do it! Be a therapist! All the cool kids are doing it.
In all seriousness, it does start feeling like you literally have been set free from self-imposed prison. I have seen lots of people (including me) just break down in tears reflecting upon how miraculous it is that they are no longer a slave to the bottle. Freedom is scary but so wonderful.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
Having dreams for the future sure does contradict the "live in today" movement and mind set of AA doesn't it?
Not the way I see it. Otherwise we'd be cautioned about doing the weekly shopping. Plan for the future, by all means, but live in the day.
I read something really interesting in rehab about living in the moment and the crux of it was that you can't be happy tomorrow. You can only be happy right now. So sacrificing happiness now for some payoff in the future ("If I work 80 hrs a week now in a job I hate then in ten years I can retire and be happy") is something that can't work except by accident, but if you are enjoying and focusing on the moment while being aware of the future you can have the best of all worlds ("I really love doing what I do and because there is some money left over each week I might put it aside and holiday in Tahiti next year").
So while I put money aside for the trip I may or not make (life - that thing that happens while you make other plans), I'm not busting a gut or keeping myself to such a strict regime that TODAY suffers because of it.
My 2c on it anyway, and remember that I read that when my head felt like it was going through a washing machine so I might have missed the whole point of it and made my own version up. Still, it has a good beat and I reckon I can dance to it so unless someone can show me how I'm way off the mark I'm going to stick to it.
