Wow Angell you do have some time on your hands. . Maybe you are comparing their (writers of the big book) outsides with your insides. They speak of ideals, you speak of progress. We never get there, because we're human and flawed individuals. We'll never be saints. We can be/will be a heck of a lot better than we were, but the journey never ends. I think that if you're enjoying the ride, something is going right.
-- Edited by StPeteDean on Monday 11th of June 2012 05:59:13 PM
My wife is recovering from surgery and I'm staying close by this week. As she's doing alot of sleeping, I'm finding myself with alot more time than normal and it's got me thinking. Thinking leads to posting and so...
Let me first say that it is my own life that is prompting the questions in this thread - no one elses. I'm just sharing some of the dialog that's rattling around up there.
It is occasionally pointed out that the Big Book was written by a bunch of folks who, because AA began in 1935 and the Big Book came out in 1939, did not have any more than four years sobriety and the average amount of sobriety in the group was eighteen months. This might be the case but as an author, I can attest to the fact that from finished product to published is not an overnight event - though who knows, maybe the publishing world has changed since 1939. Anyway, my point was just that there is a very good chance that the authors of the Big Book had significantly less time than even the relatively young 'four years'.
Anywho... the phrase 'progress not perfection' is not new to anyone who has been around the meetings or who has read the literature but it's a pretty vague phrase. "I didn't drink today" is progress over what I was like the day I came in but it's not alot of progress over yesterday.
What progress did the early AA-ers make in order to write such a book? Am I progressing anywhere near as fast? Am I using the phrase 'progress not perfection' as a crutch to inch along this spiritual path when I am capable of jogging with short periods of sprinting?
I am the only one capable of answering these questions of course, but I think they are some good questions to ask and this is me sharing what's going on inside my head with this particular fellowship to hold myself a bit more accountable - so thanks for being here and helping me along my journey.
I think our very mindset is what Bill was thinking when he wrote that ... If we accepted nothing less than perfection, who then could stay sober ??? ... The Big Big Book says 'all have fallen short of the glory of God' ... so it is something we 'strive' for but only get as a result of 'grace' (meaning sobriety/salvation) ...
Progress IS necessary for us to maintain our goal ... A great teacher one time said, 'because you are neither 'hot' nor 'cold', I will spew you out of my mouth' ... and I believe the meaning/lesson here is that we are to continually to seek progress(growth) lest we become 'stagnate'(lukewarm) and go by the wayside ...
In the past, I have seen 'the goal' as unattainable ... In my walking exercises I recently started, there are a couple of hills that pose a challenge to me ... I have found that if I keep looking at the top of the hill, it's hard to ignore the leg and calf pain I have ... and my mind starts telling me it's too far, you can't make it ... then I thought, one day at a time, why not one step at a time ??? ... I took my eyes off the summit and looked at the ground and just put one foot in front of the other ... one step at a time, I made the top and continued til I got back home ... One step toward my goal was progress ... If I stopped taking the next step, I'd never reach my goal ...
Now you know what goes through my mind every morning ... LOL
God Bless, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
I have no idea! So how's that for progress!!!???? LOL Seriously - I'm just teetering at the point of knowing there is so much I don't know. BUT - at least I know that now!!
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
StPeteDean - Did a fellow whose name begins with 'Saint' just say, "We'll never be saints?" Just asking. :) Absolutely enjoying the ride Dean, as I expect you are....but there is nothing more important (to me) than spiritual growth and I enjoy discussing it as well as challenging myself - taking inventory on my effort and focus in that direction etc., etc.
Justadrunk - Knowing that I didn't know was the single greatest step forward that I've ever taken.
Thank you for that share ... LMAO ... ... ... Oh Lord, Saint Pete Dean tellin' us we'll never be saints .... HA! ... thanks again Angel ... you just made my day ... I know, I know, ... it doesn't take much to amuse me ... heehee
Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Saint and Angel. Very funny! Angell, you sound like me when I get to much time on my hands. I think, think more, think more and then need to rationalize the answer- damn it. Obession of course. My head is like a bad neighborhood. Not good to spend to much time there on my own.
For me it's Spiritual Progress not Spiritual Perfection. It's also sometime quickly, some times slowly. Sorta like; we're on a journey not a sprint. I see progress over long periods of time. If I just look at yesterday I may be setting myself up for failure. I've used year increments and it seems to work well. What was I like 1 year ago today, compared to where I'm at? What am I doing, think and feeling?
. Maybe you are comparing their (writers of the big book) outsides with your insides. They speak of ideals, you speak of progress. We never get there, because we're human and flawed individuals. We'll never be saints. We can be/will be a heck of a lot better than we were, but the journey never ends. I think that if you're enjoying the ride, something is going right.
Obession of course. 
My head is like a bad neighborhood. Not good to spend to much time there on my own.