Are you serious Ruhig? Did you say a caveman? Wow, I'm not so sure about that. You might want to rethink that whole caveman thing, unless you're clubbing people over the head that is. As far as the other thing goes, I can certainly relate. My first wife was an angry woman who just happened to be full of herself as well. She would use distraction techniques just to see how pliable I was. So I'm not really surprised by all this Ruhig. People are just that, people, so pay them no mind, okay. And besides, you're becoming a productive member of society anyway, so let that petty stuff go, alright. I would concentrate on more important issues anyway, like sobriety. So my suggestion Ruhig is actually quite simple, keep a sober perspective instead. And, of course, never, ever, give up hope. We won't either should you.
-- Edited by Mr_David on Sunday 3rd of June 2012 11:34:10 PM
Ugh. I can't get rid of this anxiety. I cleaned the apartment. Ran for an hour, took an hour and a half bath/shower. I read my myth book. After 5 hours of trying to feel productive, clearing out nervous energy, I was ok. And THEN, after taking a nap, the FIRST thing out of his mouth is EXACTLY what started all this anxiety. So, I try to reply with as much faith and spiritual soundness as I can muster [any one heard of fake it till you make it?] universe will reward foot work, it's always the darkest before dawn, if we do what's right karma will come full circle. But now, I have become a caveman. Responses come out as grunts, groans, huffs. But here is what I've realized in this situation: 1. My "spirit" ( for lack of better word) is comfortable within my hometown and I have traded my checkbook for this comfortability. 2. No one got violent, verbally or otherwise, tonight. 3. I honestly do not want to use right now, I'm praying for a sensory deprivation chamber (still looking for outside things to quell the inside, but atleast I can say I truely don't believe in drugs/alcohol anymore) thanks for letting me share... May the force be with you.
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sober: showing no excessive or extreme qualities of fancy, emotion, or prejudice
You reminded me of one of the things I went through in early sobriety ... I don't know if it was just anxiety though ... I think as my body began repairing the damage that alcohol did to it, I began to have more energy and I had more time than I knew what to do with ... I found it became a real chore to find things to occupy my 'freakin' time ... when I wasn't drinking all the time, wow, i realized I had time coming out my 'ying-yang' ... LOL ...
So I set about cleaning the house, rearranging closets, fixing things that had been 'put off' for ages ... I washed windows, painted the house, repainted the woodwork, the ceiling, etc. ... well, you get the picture ... I reread all my AA literature ... read a bunch of new novels ... oh wow, the list is unending ...
The point is, is that there is a 'transition period' from our old selves, and our old routines, and our old 'way of thinking' ... a 'transition' that takes a little 'time' to complete ... once completed, we find ourselves in a state of 'peace and serenity' and all our new problems have ready solutions ... our program will teach us all we need to know ... It's a great new 'way-of-life' ... just hang in there until the miracle happens and you have a chance to live the promises ... They will come, as long as we work for them ...
Love Ya and God Bless, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Thanks for your replies. I checked the bank today. Were not as bad as we thought we were. Three day rule [learned this from oldtimer] day 1- feel your feeling. Find a way to properly express it (reading your replies were a huge help) day 2- evaluate situation. (went to bank) and looked at our options. Day 3- make decision, take action. ... ... ... Thanks for putting things into perspective for me. May the force be with you.
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sober: showing no excessive or extreme qualities of fancy, emotion, or prejudice
