Tipster...you think or feel that God feels that way about you and then....could you be wrong? While God does God's part you have to do Tipster's part. What you're getting is the consequences of you doing your part not God doing God's part. You wanting what we have?
((((hugs))))
I've also done Dean's 90x90...it worked for him like it worked for me and many others. Try it...90 meetings in 90 days (or more...meetings that is in 90 days). See how that works out.
Try praying and begging like your drinking.
-- Edited by Jerry F on Tuesday 29th of May 2012 01:43:00 AM
-- Edited by Jerry F on Tuesday 29th of May 2012 01:44:11 AM
Ive had a major spiritual experience, but I was a very sick person when I began practicing the steps. Ive never had "god" grant me a wish but something is returning me to a place I was many many years ago...sometimes we go through things that are like a death and they are no fun whatseover, some people actually do lose everything, including life. I never felt the actual "experience" until I was on the very bottom, and that was after I had been in a hospital for a long time and was out drinking again as a broken down person in solitude and poverty... I found the program never worked until I truly WANTED it.. I truly confessed I was in trouble with alcohol and truly WANTED something else...and I begun having a spiritual experience.
-- Edited by Closer on Tuesday 29th of May 2012 04:11:26 AM
Well, my name is Angel and I'd be happy to touch you and shine a light in your eyes but ya know, it doesn't always work out so easily. :)
Okay, enough light-heartedness... I don't know why you have to suffer and struggle - but nearly everyone does. I'm not sure what you've prayed, begged and pleaded for - was it the burning bush moment? It may never come. Depending upon your belief system, God may have said 'no'. Or perhaps there is no God (which I only mention because you put god in quotes). Check out appendix 2 in the fourth edition of the Big Book it's on page 567. And good luck.
I've prayed for my desire to drink to be removed, but mostly, that just meant I was telling myself I REALLY REALLY wanted to not drink. I don't know the exact term, self fulfilling prophecy? Reverse psychology on myself? Hmmmm.... it's like, when I hated the taste of beer, but told people at the parties repeatedly that I liked it, so they wouldn't question why I would drink so much of something I didn't like. Soon, I started to crave the taste of beer, I still didn't like it, but my mind heard it outta my own mouth enough times and believed it.
-- Edited by justadrunk on Wednesday 30th of May 2012 07:00:36 AM
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
On average, the distance between the pit of despair and a spiritual awakening is about 12 steps. Once in a while someone will stumble over a special siritual experience on that journey.
Aye Closer, I understand that. Mine was similar. I was at absolute bottom. Lost everything that mattered to me and death was all that awaited me. I don't know why me and not others, but if the price of admission is to be where I was then maybe a slow awakening is preferable to the lightning bolt. Maybe when you are at that point a lightning bolt is needed because it's the only way to get your attention, whereas a higher bottom is a more flexible instrument that can handle the subtlety. Maybe. In any event trying to figure out the reasonings of the universe when we are but flecks of dust in it seems like a fruitless exercise.
But Tipsy I wasn't kidding in my first post - this program is a miracle. A real and powerful one. It's happening all around you everyday, and maybe you need to step back a bit and truly see it for what it is rather than trying to understand it, to get that awakening you are searching for.
Huh? Why does "god" feel that I should have to suffer and struggle? I've prayed, I've begged and pleaded. So...WTF?
Hey Tip, ...
Take a closer look at yourself before you start pinning your failures on God or anyone else ... Do you really have any 'respect' for the creator of the universe??? ... Do You pray to 'a god' rather than the 'God' maybe??? ... Do You beg and plead for 'wisdom and understanding' for a few days and EXPECT your demands to be met??? ... Do you expect to get what you want without diligent work and perseverance mixed with patience and humility??? ...
Can you stop crying and begging like a 4 year old long enough to grow a pair of b___ and stay sober long enough to reap the benefits of working the steps??? ...
(I wanted this soooo bad, and was 'f...d' up so bad that I felt it necessary to go to 660+ meetings in 660 days ... yep, nearly a meeting a day for two years) ...
How bad do you REALLY want your sobriety and all the promises that go with it ??? ... Let's be TOTALLY 'Honest' here!!!
And you expect 'bright lights and whistles or whatever' ??? ... I'd say you just bought yourself some extra time to wait for the 'bright lights' ... if, in fact they are to ever be granted to you ... Grow up Tipsy ... get with the program or start expecting to get what you've always gotten ... You are no exception to God's grace one way or the other ... stop trying to 'speed' it up ...
Pappy
__________________
'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Huh? Why does "god" feel that I should have to suffer and struggle? I've prayed, I've begged and pleaded. So...WTF?
Hey Tip, ...
Take a closer look at yourself before you start pinning your failures on God or anyone else ... Do you really have any 'respect' for the creator of the universe??? ... Do You pray to 'a god' rather than the 'God' maybe??? ... Do You beg and plead for 'wisdom and understanding' for a few days and EXPECT your demands to be met??? ... Do you expect to get what you want without diligent work and perseverance mixed with patience and humility??? ...
Can you stop crying and begging like a 4 year old long enough to grow a pair of b___ and stay sober long enough to reap the benefits of working the steps??? ...
(I wanted this soooo bad, and was 'f...d' up so bad that I felt it necessary to go to 660+ meetings in 660 days ... yep, nearly a meeting a day for two years) ...
How bad do you REALLY want your sobriety and all the promises that go with it ??? ... Let's be TOTALLY 'Honest' here!!!
And you expect 'bright lights and whistles or whatever' ??? ... I'd say you just bought yourself some extra time to wait for the 'bright lights' ... if, in fact they are to ever be granted to you ... Grow up Tipsy ... get with the program or start expecting to get what you've always gotten ... You are no exception to God's grace one way or the other ... stop trying to 'speed' it up ...
Pappy
Lol, I like this guy :)
Sure...I can give all that stuff a try.
I had Spiritual Experiences start happening in my life once I started The 12 Steps. The Awakening came upon completion of The 12 Steps. I maintain The Awakening by carrying the message to other Alcoholics and practicing The Principles in all my affairs on a daily basis.
Anything short of Step work didn't work for this Alcoholic. Today, I stay in the middle of The Program. It's harder to fall out that way. I pray, turn over my will to the best of my ability, consistent meeting attendance, Home Group, work with a Sponsor, Sponsor others, Service work, Steps 10-12 on a daily basis and pray again at night. Works well.
You are, if nothing else, entertaining ... You have been around here a lot longer than I have been and you bring up some of THE MOST interesting AND controversial subjects I've ever seen or been a part of ... and for that, I am grateful ...
Whether you're aware of it or not, You have been responsible for some very 'soul searching' moments for me in the past ... And I have sometimes even used your 'web name' in our local meetings in relation to things you've shared so as to make a point ... (I do not mention any particular site in conjunction with your 'web' name) ... If nothing else, you've helped give me back a sense of humor when I thought my sober world was starting to get dull ...
So, ... ... ... I just wanted to 'thank you' for helping me to grow in my program and to be even more 'desiring' of sobriety than ever ... My hat's off to you sir ...
God Bless you Tipsy, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
I didn't get the big bright light...I got glimmers. A few at first, some brighter than others, and more and more as time has passed. I now bask in this lovely glow as long as I work on my relationship with God. More shall be revealed. :)
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I think there's an invisible principle of living...if we believe we're guided through every step of our lives, we are. Its a lovely sight, watching it work.
Huh? Why does "god" feel that I should have to suffer and struggle? I've prayed, I've begged and pleaded. So...WTF?
Hey Tip, ...
Take a closer look at yourself before you start pinning your failures on God or anyone else ... Do you really have any 'respect' for the creator of the universe??? ... Do You pray to 'a god' rather than the 'God' maybe??? ... Do You beg and plead for 'wisdom and understanding' for a few days and EXPECT your demands to be met??? ... Do you expect to get what you want without diligent work and perseverance mixed with patience and humility??? ...
Can you stop crying and begging like a 4 year old long enough to grow a pair of b___ and stay sober long enough to reap the benefits of working the steps??? ...
(I wanted this soooo bad, and was 'f...d' up so bad that I felt it necessary to go to 660+ meetings in 660 days ... yep, nearly a meeting a day for two years) ...
How bad do you REALLY want your sobriety and all the promises that go with it ??? ... Let's be TOTALLY 'Honest' here!!!
And you expect 'bright lights and whistles or whatever' ??? ... I'd say you just bought yourself some extra time to wait for the 'bright lights' ... if, in fact they are to ever be granted to you ... Grow up Tipsy ... get with the program or start expecting to get what you've always gotten ... You are no exception to God's grace one way or the other ... stop trying to 'speed' it up ...
Pappy
Lol, I like this guy :) Sure...I can give all that stuff a try.
You remind me of a guy I used to know who was into some sort of "I dont give a F" hip hop thing...Im not sure whatever happened to him but I dont remember the last I heard being very good. If you want to have a good life where your "Feeling like a man" or whatever it is, Id seriously suggest you work this program with sincerity and see things through anothers eyes. God and religion are really no joke, and I really wouldnt ever mess with something greater than yourself. Id be willing to bet your a guy who wants to succeed and be a great success more than anything else but every single time somethings holding you back. If you have the power to clean up your life and get to your goals you should go ahead and do it! The 'Bright Light" experience your wanting isnt something you should be desperate for, it might even come at a time when your wishing your your old self more than anything on earth, and youll more than likely wish it never happened in the first place. If your looking for god to turn you into some sort of "special person" or "spiritual" person you are seriously in the wrong. Something tells me you have the power to do what your wanting to do, but you never will, and believe me if you wait until its so awful that you actually are seeing the lights, youll understand something, and I doubt youll want to.
If your someone who can make a change now, and WANT to make a change, you seriously should do it. I dont think your aware of how ugly it can get.
((((hugs))))