Today, I was unreasonably angry. My job is mindless work. And my ego got the better of me as I proclaimed in my mind that I am better at my job than any and all other cna's. Also, my brain hates me more this week than any other time. And I just wasn't up for going to a meeting with everyone fidgeting and coughing and sipping coffee loudly or mispronouncing words. But I dragged my ass over to my sponsors place and we talked and my sponsee sister and I shared stories and hope and accolades. And when I got back home three hours later, I'm way more centered. I don't know what we talked about or when I began to feel better, but I do know I gained some perspective. Someone told me the meetings you want to skip most are the ones you need the most, and I think this was quite the example.
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sober: showing no excessive or extreme qualities of fancy, emotion, or prejudice
Today, I was unreasonably angry. My job is mindless work. And my ego got the better of me as I proclaimed in my mind that I am better at my job than any and all other cna's. Also, my brain hates me more this week than any other time. And I just wasn't up for going to a meeting with everyone fidgeting and coughing and sipping coffee loudly or mispronouncing words. But I dragged my ass over to my sponsors place and we talked and my sponsee sister and I shared stories and hope and accolades. And when I got back home three hours later, I'm way more centered. I don't know what we talked about or when I began to feel better, but I do know I gained some perspective. Someone told me the meetings you want to skip most are the ones you need the most, and I think this was quite the example.
Great Share, ... reminded me of me ...
It took me a long time to realize I was self-centered to the extreme ... Still wanted things to go the way I thought they ought to ... everything was about ME and then when someone pointed all that out, I came away with a different point of view ... and working the program of AA helped me to get rid of me and become what Papa(God) had in mind for me to be ...
God Bless,
Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Awww, Don't get down on yourself to much ... the only thing we need to change is 'everything', Heehee ... In the "Doctor's Opinion" ... he says that unless this person can experience an 'entire psychic change', there is very little hope of his recovery ... Took a while to get our 'thinking' in the shape it's in, so it'll take some time to get it to where it should be ... LOL
There are four books on my desk I see each and everyday, and I re-read them as necessary to refresh my thinking ... If you're wondering, they are: The Bible, the AA Big Book, the AA 12 X 12, and 'The Shack' by William P Young ... I also take these with me when I travel ... They all have become my very 'life blood' ...
God Bless, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
1. How do you read the bible and not get filled with resentment and outrage and 2. Did you read the shack from beginning to end or just the last half?
LOL ... The Bible is simply history of the beginning of mankind and is filled with many, many interesting stories ... The New Testament is the fullfilling of the promises made in the Old Testament ... If one were to read this with an open mind, the wisdom therein is immeasureable ...
The Shack, ??? ... I've read it no less than 10 times all the way through ... It's the last 1/2 that has what I consider an 'uncanny' wisdom about it ... So much so, that I have 'high-lited' it just like a college study book ... If you have not yet read this book, there's a depressing 'leadin' story that takes a big turn in the story about half way through ... then you simply cannot put it down ... (I 've said it before ... contained in this book were the words that lead me to an understanding and a concept of my God that I was only able to accept AA after reading ...)(I spent 13 -15 years in and out of AA until reading this book and then everything fell into place for me, allowing me not to drink now for over four years ...)
It is simple enough, I would not be alive today if I had not read the book ... I nearly died in rehab that last time and I know in my heart, I didn't have another relapse left in me ... I am a very different person today ...
Love Ya and God Bless,
Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
