I sit down to write here on this AA forum, and really, I have nothing much to say. But I made a personal commitment to myself that during this 90x90 day period, I would also post here each day. Partly because the writing is healing. Partly so I can peek back at myself... laugh at myself... learn from myself... get over being embarrassed to be myself.
The thought just popped into my head - hmmm.... what to write about... a drink would sure help... WHAT????
Yep, still an alcoholic. Oh well, today it's just like a crazy extra arm that flaps around from the side of me, once out of control, now a useful third hand.
Do I like having 3 upper apendages... being different? That doesn't really matter. It's what I do with what I have.
Thanks to those of you who gave me the support I did not earn. I'm grateful to be who I am today, and for you.
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
Thank heavens we do not have to earn anything, or be worthy, or be perfect, or fall down in shame or guilt or self-loathing, in order to receive the gifts of this fellowship and the blessings of sobriety and a great 12 step process for daily living, through thick and thin. Gratitude is contagious--thanks for passing it on!! :)
Hey, ... I figured out a while back that I am as likely to 'will' away my alcoholism as a leopard is to 'will' away it's spots ... LOL
So yep, I'm still and alcoholic ... ... ... The difference is I choose not to drink 'today' ... Tomorrow???, who the hell knows ... Just not today ....
God Bless, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Tasha - There is an AWESOME benefit to posting regularly here on MIP - In a flash I can find you something you might find humorous but also meaningful:
This is my first post on MIP over 3 and a half years ago: 12/11/08
"I am so grateful to finally be able to post on this site. I have been reading the messages and posts from some of you for about a month now. It has been a struggle and today I have 72 days. In my fellowship, that means I have a pinkchip that will turn red on day 90 God willing. This 72 days has been a period of great turbulence, but also tremendous growth. Not going to get too much into my story. I just wanted to say hi and that I look forward to being part of this forum and gaining wisdom and possibly giving back some of what has been given to me from reading the wise posts of others. I have really enjoyed the posts on the Language of Letting Go....and basically hearing about how some of you people with time get through life without drinking. Thanks."
**I don't think that on day 72 of sobreity, I'd ever imagined I would now have over 1000 days sober. I'm not much for writing in a personal journal so this "E-Journal" of my sobriety journey is pretty damn cool Lol.
Mark
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
Thank heavens we do not have to earn anything, or be worthy, or be perfect, or fall down in shame or guilt or self-loathing, in order to receive the gifts of this fellowship and the blessings of sobriety and a great 12 step process for daily living, through thick and thin. Gratitude is contagious--thanks for passing it on!! :)
Thanks Lee for writing what I was trying to compose myself, you saved me some time. We certainly did earn our chair here, each and every one, the fortunate few that found this place, and stayed.