I have been so preoccupied with planning a vacation and mother's day that I just couldn't make it. I feel like I'm searching for excuses to get out of meetings even though I really haven't.
I feel kind of like I've let myself down and that i'm taking steps back into my sobriety.
Any words of advice as to not be down on myself for this? I'm almost at 90 days and I don't want to take any steps back or stressing myself out about not getting to meetings.
bizzaro, ... 90 meetings in 90 days IS so very important ... But everyone's different ... Depending on where you are spiritually in the program, you may find yourself beginning to participate in life again ... meaning that there are life issues that you can address now, that you were incapable of, just a few short months ago ...
Early on for me, I did an average of 8 meetings a week for right at two years .... Yep, you guessed it, I was 'sicker' than most ... and when my personal and professional life began to soar again, I found it necessary to back off the meetings ... At first, I felt guilty ... no reason to, but I did ... I felt as if I wasn't 'giving back' as much as I felt I should ... but as I learned from my sponsor, the whole idea of living the principles of AA was to be the 'Dad' or 'husband' or 'manager' that I was always capable of being ....
So today I attend on average, three meetings a week, sometimes four, because I enjoy it ... You may or may not be at the point where you need to 'balance' your time between AA, work, and family yet ... But the time will come, as they say, to do all things in 'moderation' ...
God Bless, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Yea the 90 in 90 is why I'm down on myself. But I feel like I have a new outlook about life stress issues. I just don't like missing meetings. Thanks for the input Pappy
You know what your doing, always time to correct things quick, ASP.
I attend my meetings even when we have visitors or guests. They understand and its just for a short time away from the,they are happy to do other things, even get their own space, peace and quiet :}
Take a look at the second from top thread /postings on here, you will find my share second from last. We stopped the meetings and went to hell on earth, and never got back for a further 5yrs. We lost it all ! Second time back for us thank God. 7+8yrs..We have both now over taken our last years in :}
I can not insist on the importance to keeping up meetings enough,please look for our share....Well done on you 90 days,that's wonderful and great awareness in understanding the importance, and the effect of missing them. Your needed in a meeting ASP to share on this one,it will help so many others, THINK,THINK,THINK :}
Keep coming back it gets better. :} Please up date us all too.
I've been doubling up when I miss - it does feel strange to not go for a day doesn't it? I am doing 90x90 right now too. I did about 35 days straight, then missed one... then another... then another... I noticed a change in my thinking right away - and started doing two a day asap. Now I realize that I just need to search within myself, and I will know if I'm okay to miss a meeting or not. You will find you can judge that too I bet. You will probably feel it when you need one, and I always remember, if I don't WANT to go, that's when I MUST! If I want to go, and can't - I'm usually doing okay. I went to the park with my Mother and kids instead of going to a meeting, and I'm online right now, looking for an evening one ; ) Someone very wise told me that this is about establishing AA as a part of your life, and getting into the habit of it... so for now, even if I'm okay, if I can, I go.
-- Edited by justadrunk on Tuesday 15th of May 2012 03:12:52 PM
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
I've been doubling up when I miss - it does feel strange to not go for a day doesn't it? I am doing 90x90 right now too. I did about 35 days straight, then missed one... then another... then another... I noticed a change in my thinking right away - and started doing two a day asap. Now I realize that I just need to search within myself, and I will know if I'm okay to miss a meeting or not. You will find you can judge that too I bet. You will probably feel it when you need one, and I always remember, if I don't WANT to go, that's when I MUST! If I want to go, and can't - I'm usually doing okay. I went to the park with my Mother and kids instead of going to a meeting, and I'm online right now, looking for an evening one ; ) Someone very wise told me that this is about establishing AA as a part of your life, and getting into the habit of it... so for now, even if I'm okay, if I can, I go.
-- Edited by justadrunk on Tuesday 15th of May 2012 03:12:52 PM
That's exactly how I feel, thanks for sharing. I'm just trying to convince myself it's ok and I haven't relapsed and that my thoughts are in the right place. I have made sure to flip through the big book as often as I can and I hit up one meeting this morning and have one tonight.
I've been doubling up when I miss - it does feel strange to not go for a day doesn't it? I am doing 90x90 right now too. I did about 35 days straight, then missed one... then another... then another... I noticed a change in my thinking right away - and started doing two a day asap. Now I realize that I just need to search within myself, and I will know if I'm okay to miss a meeting or not. You will find you can judge that too I bet. You will probably feel it when you need one, and I always remember, if I don't WANT to go, that's when I MUST! If I want to go, and can't - I'm usually doing okay. I went to the park with my Mother and kids instead of going to a meeting, and I'm online right now, looking for an evening one ; ) Someone very wise told me that this is about establishing AA as a part of your life, and getting into the habit of it... so for now, even if I'm okay, if I can, I go.
-- Edited by justadrunk on Tuesday 15th of May 2012 03:12:52 PM
Aye, well said. I travel a lot in order to see my kids, and on those weekends I find it really hard to find the time to go to meetings, but I noticed that if I didn't I'd start feeling a bit ratty. My head wouldn't feel as clear and I'd notice that I would start letting little things bug me in a way they normally wouldn't.
So now I make sure I make the effort, and in doing that I can see that all the other elements of my life run so much smoother.
I like the thought of meetings being medicine. It feels like that to me. I always feel better for being at one, and not so well if I miss them.
My second meeting today was kind of a big wake up call to me. It was all about step one and just thinking back to where I was three months ago and a year ago how horribly my life was going. But no, all high and mighty Nick had things under control. My life was all in order, my bills were paid on time, I was still cooking on a daily basis, I didn't have a problem. Skipping three days worth of meetings kind of made me arrogant and tonight's meeting really put me back in to my place.
Again I'm grateful for the accessibility of AA and the people on this board who give such great insight. I'm back on track and won't be "relapsing" on skipping meetings. I enjoy going to meetings and feel sane in a room full of socially insane people. Thanks again.
For me meetings is like the gas required to keep the flame alight. When I stay away from meetings, my reserve runs low and eventually the flame dies off completely.
For me meetings is like the gas required to keep the flame alight. When I stay away from meetings, my reserve runs low and eventually the flame dies off completely.
For me meetings is like the gas required to keep the flame alight. When I stay away from meetings, my reserve runs low and eventually the flame dies off completely.