Hi Tracey C, my name is Sheila and i am an alcoholic. my fears kept me drinking a very long time, far after it was enjoyable. Wolfie shared today in his post from the Daily Reflection, "Fear is often the force that prevents me from acquiring and cultivating the power of faith. Fear blocks my appreciation of beauty, tolerance, forgiveness, service, and serenity." - daily reflection ..... and for me, AA is helping me let go of fear so that i can find the real me and the only way i could begin to do that was to become willing to do whatever it took to sober up, get a sponsor, and work the steps. 12 step programs can help anybody, and i am glad you have a program to help you grow and be the Tracey C you are meant to be... what God wants you to be.... no one else is in charge of you, except you. you go, girl! jj/sheila
-- Edited by jj on Saturday 21st of April 2012 05:38:21 PM
This morning I woke from a deep sleep, with the sudden realisation, that I am where I am because of me. Not from anyone/anything else. Soley from the choices I have made for my life.
In the Laundry List book Step 5 reads - We admitted to our Higher Power, To Ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our childhood abandonment.
It goes on to say - Out of a searching and blameless inventory of our parents we come to see how we reacted, adapted, revolted and restisted -and ultimately abandoned ourselves. When we review the nature of our parents' illness, we come to see how many of their behavior patterns replaced our youthful innocence and spontaneity; we see all the desperate adaptations, all the frightened defenses we built, all of the repression, frustration and flight. Through these parent-taught mechanisms we truly abandoned ourselves.
Oh my. I have been abandoning myself all throughout my life, trying to please my parents, my husband even trying to please the God of my understanding at that time.
I have been abandoning myself all throughout my life, trying to please my parents, my husband even trying to please the God of my understanding at that time.